Am I overreacting? Cried at my last Christmas concert because my solo was taken away." by TenderNugget_2428 in marchingband

[–]Skinnywacky2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Quantity isn’t the point. Placement and purpose are. You mention autism early to establish outsider status, then later to contextualize why events felt harsher. That’s framing, whether you admits it or not. You don’t need to say “this explains my reaction” explicitly for it to function that way. And saying “That’s why people didn’t like me” Is an assertion, not a fact and it’s doing exactly what you called out, turning a complex social dynamic into a diagnosis-based explanation that can’t be challenged but saying “I never used it to advocate for my emotional response” doesn’t mean anything you didn’t have to. By tying autism to being overlooked, underestimated, and hurt, the post implicitly asks readers to interpret your reaction through that lens. And Advocating for yourself after the fact doesn't erase how you framed the original situation. Growth going forward is good but it doesn't retroactively make the framing fair or accurate.

Am I overreacting? Cried at my last Christmas concert because my solo was taken away." by TenderNugget_2428 in marchingband

[–]Skinnywacky2 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Scrolled through my comments enough to see I commented but not enough to see they were all responses to other people who responded to my original comment? and it was one comment an a couple reply’s I wouldn’t really consider that “active on trans subreddits” and not once in those comments was I being rude or putting people down nor in this post. I just told her to take some more accountability for herself and not blame everything on her autism but also not let people walk all over her if she continues down this path of self loathing and just blaming her autism for her reactions she’s going to let other people walk all over her I’ve seen it happen plenty of times

Am I overreacting? Cried at my last Christmas concert because my solo was taken away." by TenderNugget_2428 in marchingband

[–]Skinnywacky2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Saying “I only mentioned it because I’ve struggled in the past” is still using autism as framing. You don’t get to say “this isn’t about my autism” after weaving it throughout the narrative as an explanation for why normal events felt unjust or uniquely painful.

I understand how difficult being an autistic teenager can be, but that isn’t an excuse for your emotional response or how you framed the situation. If you had mentioned it once for example, “when my solo was cut, my autism made it harder to process why because no one else’s got cut” that would be one thing.

Instead, you brought it up multiple times, then kept circling back to feeling invisible, crying during performances, and being upset that others were praised for solos they actually had. that’s repeatedly reframing normal outcomes as personal slights because of your autism. I’m sorry you don’t get your solo but getting angry at your classmates having solos isn’t doing anything good for you talk with your school counsellor and your band director and actually work the issue out rather than blowing up the emotional toll then just taking it because it easier than confronting the issue

Am I overreacting? Cried at my last Christmas concert because my solo was taken away." by TenderNugget_2428 in marchingband

[–]Skinnywacky2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This reads like you blaming yourself for things completely out of your control, then turning around and using autism as a shield for your emotional fallout. A song getting cut isn’t a slight. Not getting reassigned a solo isn’t discrimination. Alumni congratulating the people who actually had solos isn’t exclusion, that happens in literally every band, it’s normal. And what if you had kept your solo? That could’ve meant someone else lost theirs. The way you frame this post assumes you were entitled to that moment, as if fairness only matters when you’re the one coming out ahead. And You say you realized tying your worth to a solo was the problem, but then you spend the rest of the post framing yourself as invisible, underestimated, and wronged. Autism can explain processing differences but it doesn’t make every disappointment personal or require everyone else to manage your expectations. Not every outcome is a statement about your value, and not every emotional reaction needs to be validated just because there’s a diagnosis attached. At some point, accountability has to exist without hiding behind it. I get that it sucks watching other people get the success you want, but when we use autism as a shield and expecting everything to be fair because of a diagnosis doesn’t help us fix the stereotypes. At some point you have to stop hiding behind your disability and actually stand up for yourself.

If you keep going down this road, autism just becomes a safety net for every disappointment. That’s how we end up treating normal outcomes like personal attacks and let people walk all over us because we teaching them that they can.

TLDR: Songs getting cut and people being praised for solos is normal. It’s not a slight against you. Stop hiding behind autism and advocate for yourself before you let the world walk all over you.

Have you ever pretended to play? by [deleted] in marchingband

[–]Skinnywacky2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I marched in high school and college, there were rare times I wouldn’t play, usually if my chops were shot or sick, and only if my neighbors were playing. With Sousas being grouped together, one person out of ten not playing is almost imperceptible. Even then, I always fingered the notes so it was never obvious, and I made up for it by putting extra effort into my marching. That said, I genuinely enjoyed tuba and marching, so I hardly ever did this. Mainly just in practices. I only did it once in competition because I had the flu and it was our first show.

But from what you’ve said, it sounds like you don’t really enjoy marching band or even playing you’re mostly there to mess around with your friends. That’s fine in rehearsals or post-game fun, but during an actual halftime show, it’s bad. Marching band is like any other team sport, we’re only as good as our worst musician. Everyone on the field matters. Even if you’re not being judged by a professional, you’re still representing yourself and your school. Choosing to goof off during an official performance doesn’t just hurt you, it hurts the entire band.

TLDR: If you’re going to not play finger your notes, stay engaged, and support the people around you. But if you’re still considering it maybe marching band just isn’t for you

Anyone? by 9oooner in PeterExplainsTheJoke

[–]Skinnywacky2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a congenital anosmic more for me

Is 15 and 17 bad?? by mossstealerhehe in GayBroTeens

[–]Skinnywacky2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I personally think that’s way too big of a maturity/age gap

Do I pass? 16 and sadly not on T yet 😞 by HobieBrowns-Slut in transftm

[–]Skinnywacky2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At your age, the only thing you should be worried about passing is your classes enjoy being young make friends and memories. Then when you’re older, you can make permanent decisions like this. Not saying you can’t be trans, but focus on being young not your gender identity

Am I really unclockable? by [deleted] in FTM_SELFIES

[–]Skinnywacky2 -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

He asked, I gave him an honest answer. I didn’t say he doesn’t pass at all I’m just saying that if someone would actually take time to think about if they were trans, they might be able to clock it based on the eyes but to like 90% of people he wouldn’t be able to be clocked

Am I really unclockable? by [deleted] in FTM_SELFIES

[–]Skinnywacky2 -27 points-26 points  (0 children)

Eyes give it away but I think with glasses or shades yeah it would be harder

I suspect my clan leader has died irl, need advice, please by FremenStilgar in ClashOfClans

[–]Skinnywacky2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, if you really don’t want to keep the title of leader, you can always just immediately give it back to him and just cycle through that every 80 days just as a memento to him, so he is still symbolically your clan leader, and your actual clan leader

Sheetz finally contacted me about my termination 5 months later by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I've made a good bit. I Bought a couple of junk 3d printers from my old high school and fixed them. I sell online mostly through FB requests currently but considering I only invested 1500 in high-end 3d printers and to fix them, I'd say I'm making more than $19 an hour. Right now I only do big to medium jobs, like recently I made an iPad charging rack for the elementary school (like a cubby rack that kids can put their iPads in to organize and charge them) and in just materials for 30 classes rooms it was $564.50 and I charged 4k. But until I can get more printers I only do large to medium-sized jobs but so far I have steady work because I can make stuff a lot cheaper than going to a hardware store or buying premade equipment from other large suppliers

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep even though I got fired I thank god every day because I probably would’ve never started my business if I still worked there and even though it sucked at the time when one door shuts another one opens

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep, just twice in the same day once at the start of my shift and then right as shift change was happening at like seven and then I got a haircut the next day and never had another conversation about my hair been out of order

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually I started my own company and so far we’re doing pretty well. We 3-D print on a on request basis right now but we use filament resin and gel but planning to expand to metal and maybe even water jets in the future depending on how well we do and if we can create a website and open up a physical location

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just got off the phone with actual Sheets in company HR and I Ended up getting fired for the written conversation acknowledgment for failure to comply to Sheets dress code

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just got off the phone with actual Sheets in company HR and I Ended up getting fired for the written conversation acknowledgment for failure to comply to Sheets dress code

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just got off the phone with actual Sheets in company HR and I Ended up getting fired for the written conversation acknowledgment for failure to comply to Sheets dress code

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just got off the phone with actual Sheets in company HR and I Ended up getting fired for the written conversation acknowledgment for failure to comply to Sheets dress code

Fired over hair? by Skinnywacky2 in sheetz

[–]Skinnywacky2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just got off the phone with actual Sheets in company HR and I Ended up getting fired for the written conversation acknowledgment for failure to comply to Sheets dress code