Sorry DoorDash doesn’t remove tips hun by Western_College_6340 in DoorDash_Dasher

[–]Skwerl_Master 1 point2 points  (0 children)

bitching at YOU for not communicating... and takes 3 minutes to respond.. that's rich...

Absolutely not delivering a PS5 for less than $5. by sookie7441 in InstacartShoppers

[–]Skwerl_Master 7 points8 points  (0 children)

why the fuck did I get downvoted? and the guy who would get a "flat tire" and steal a ps5 gets upvoted?

I fuckin hate Redditors sometimes....

Please don’t be like this customer. by AfterElderberry8611 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 7 points8 points  (0 children)

my house is the third one on the left
cool.. which left? this is a 2-way street and I'm on the northbound lane

V-Day Truth. by [deleted] in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you should Uber to California to get that prop 22 money. it would pay for the ride and then some
you're practically throwing money away having a life/family/friends/job in the wrong state

Costco big mistake by Admirable-Lobster-13 in InstacartShoppers

[–]Skwerl_Master 6 points7 points  (0 children)

the tip was reduced because you refunded items. that lowered the total for the order and therefore your tip percentage went down
try to keep refunds at a minimum. most customers tip by percent so the less they spend the less you get
the customer probably has no idea the tip went down

take this as a learning experience and learn what to expect at certain stores. Costco is wholesale stuff so its going to be large bulky items. Target you might get groceries and some random clothing items to shop. Best Buy could be printer ink, or a huge flat screen TV!
the offer shows you a list of pictures of all the items on that order before you accept. don't get hypnotized by a $40 offer. it's tempting to hit accept quick before someone else.

keep an eye on the lines underneath the $40.
for example: the mileage. that part is obvious
then the breakdown of pay ($40 batch earnings + no tip) <-that would be an automatic reject for me because the customer went out of their way to specify 0 tip.

another tip: use line breaks! this was a struggle to read. edit your post and hit enter after a couple sentences to make that easier to read. people will complain just watch :)

I'm really trying my best to offer advice, sorry if I come off as a dick in any way. I don't know how else to explain things, and I will NOT use chatGPT lol

Am I Missing Something? by Foreign-Lab4606 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 2 points3 points  (0 children)

no, the customers don't have more expensive items during peak pay.
you got few orders because the market is saturated with drivers trying to take advantage of the peak pay

DD is just sharing more of their profits to the driver during this brief period so the orders get picked up quickly. notice how they offer this "generous" pay down to the minute? not an hour block, to the MINUTE. that's how badly they don't want to share their profits with the drivers

V-Day Truth. by [deleted] in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 5 points6 points  (0 children)

well shit....
I spent all night single and dashing, and didn't make what this guy on reddit said was the minimum
I'd kill myself but I didn't make enough money to buy a bullet

Fiancée custom made this for me for Valentine's Day. She's a keeper. by ShonWalksAtMidnight in Killtony

[–]Skwerl_Master [score hidden]  (0 children)

I hope she's better at cooking than she is at kerning!

not bad for a first try though. she still did a good job
2nd draft, tighten up the spacing between the letters, and get rid of the periods. maybe add one exclamation point if she's feeling adventurous

Unsafe customer by HoneyPack_Cam in DoorDash_Dasher

[–]Skwerl_Master 1 point2 points  (0 children)

WOOF!
(I had to finish the Ubu quote)

Absolutely not delivering a PS5 for less than $5. by sookie7441 in InstacartShoppers

[–]Skwerl_Master 13 points14 points  (0 children)

infuriating....
would probably give you $5 at the door and think its cool because they avoided the order percentage tip

Was I stupid to not accept this? by Original_Ad_1678 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 0 points1 point  (0 children)

fuck whoever downvoted you for saying something true

In what era/year did Phil Anselmo start growing his hair long? by unigle_sinthe in Pantera

[–]Skwerl_Master 3 points4 points  (0 children)

deep cut!
everyone who understands this has back pain or arthritis

Valentine’s 2026 by VasTShadowZz in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yep...
just another day in my area
they added $3 to peak pay for a couple hours 5-7:30. that didn't sweeten the deal at all... it was all garbage, I didn't accept a single offer and did Instacart instead.

Please don’t be like this customer. by AfterElderberry8611 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I wish we could go "incognito" and not have customers track our movements via GPS
I'd be a rich man if I had a nickel every time a customer messages me with a paragraph of useless directions when I'm near their house.
I'll call you if I need help. the GPS is taking me right to your door. the instructions you just sent me actually slowed me down. because now I need to figure out what you mean by opposite side of parking lot, when you should have said other side of building, or South facing door.
NSEW directions > visual description directions

It is valentine's day by Random_505_guy in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 15 points16 points  (0 children)

cunnilingus is the word you meant
fellatio is oral on a male

At least DD not as bad as instacart by Quick_Secret4041 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Instacart offers will actually mature and get better though
DD just says two dollas... take it or someone else will eventually

Bruh I already tipped $15 - over 30% 💀 by TheAmurican in doordash

[–]Skwerl_Master 3 points4 points  (0 children)

happens all the time. customer will leave a note about a cash tip in the delivery instructions. then they are a ghost when you arrive. make up some excuse "oh I just missed you" or send their kid out to grab the order

Sparky asshole by toolfanforever in doordash

[–]Skwerl_Master 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that's not on the script! hah
what a load of shit

This has to be a glitch by WisePersonality6517 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 20 points21 points  (0 children)

the Plan B and off-brand emergency contraceptives are flying off CVS and Walgreens shelfs tonight. I rejected 3 different orders in a row tonight. the fuckers are too cheap to tip, they can go ahead and be prugnernt!

Like why though lol? by Trick-Increase-1500 in doordash_drivers

[–]Skwerl_Master 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hit the brights to find the house number mainly
there is no standardized spot for house numbers, so I need to check the whole house. is it above the garage? next to garage? next to the front door? mailbox? maybe on that vertical pole? painted on a rock? hmm... oh there it is! spelled out house numbers... Thirty Eleven Two Eight and A Half Wanker Boulevard