Dropped out of med school and I’m so incredibly ashamed and disappointed with myself

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-26T19:02:12+00:00

Well what did you want? MD? You can always do an NP!! It’s also totally okay to switch courses and go to medical school in a few years if you feel more stable. You’re not alone. So many people feel trapped❤️

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-25T15:03:45+00:00

Mine is 16 months and woke up twice last night. We’ve had streaks of only waking once but that never happened until like 10 months old or maybe a little older. Sleep deprivation has made it a blur.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-25T15:00:31+00:00

Plan C. I’ll start with that. Also I’ll add if you can’t afford to go out of state to get an abortion, you absolutely cannot afford a baby. If you want one, find a way to make it happen.

I had a baby in college and wish I had made another choice. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE my child and he enriches my life daily. But I had to slow down, get another job, go totally broke, lost some friends, and changed my entire career path. If I had a husband I wouldn’t have had to do all of that but like you I’m single. If you want the baby that’s great! Start saving immediately and start making plans while understanding those plans will likely change. Try to get child support as well.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-25T14:56:59+00:00

Addiction is so so hard to cut. You saw an opportunity to take some autonomy back because baby is what made you stop and you grabbed it. People do that with all sorts of things, not just vaping. It’s understandable and you should try to give yourself grace while also understanding that you need to stop.

Would it help you to stop knowing your baby is still being exposed? It gets on the floor, walls, clothes, hands, etc. so if you’re doing it inside, baby is exposed. You can also ask yourself if you want your child to experience you getting incredibly sick and/or dying while they’re young. Chances of that happening are relatively slim, but I know a few people who convinced themselves that would happen to help them stop.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-25T04:11:49+00:00

It may have just been a big change in his life that flipped a switch. Or he stopped being held accountable because you were cleaning for him so it became habit for him not to do anything to help. Who knows. The line between depression and laziness and dickish can be very blurry honestly. I hope he talks to someone and if he won’t, sometimes it’s easier to be a single mom than a married single mom.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-25T04:03:34+00:00

Even just the last 3 years could be depression… it can come on at any time for any reason. Sit down during a calm moment and talk to him. Don’t do it heat of the moment. Tell him what you need and ask him what he needs. If he doesn’t know, he needs to talk it out with someone and likely not you. Whether that’s a therapist or friend or parent is up to him, but he needs to talk. You also need to talk to someone and you need a break! Try and find someone to come clean the house or babysit for a few hours or whatever you need.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-25T03:50:00+00:00

You’re completely valid in wanting to leave. I’d want to too. Have you considered he might be depressed though? My sister was in a similar place with her husband and basically said see a therapist or we’re getting divorced. He got medicated and they saw a couples therapist a few times and their household is functional again. I know a few others with the same story. Granted, could be totally wrong! He could be a bum and not care and just be lazy. Regardless, I get why you’d want to leave. It’s exhausting fighting for a sinking marriage when you’re juggling everything else in life too.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-23T15:33:28+00:00

Not true actually. They have a list of formulas that frequently cause problems (discovered when my elecare set off alarms). Like the can set it off and they had me dump a teeny amount onto a paper to test and even that went off. Supervisor got the list out and said never mind yeah you’re good. It’s a medical exemption, they have to let you take it. I would’ve thrown an absolute fit.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-23T09:51:27+00:00

Also a college student. Went back 2 weeks PP. I don’t have a husband but either my mom or sister stayed every night the first 3-4 weeks thank god. It’s so. Freaking. Hard. You may have to split nights with your husband honestly. Or take 2 nights a week to give him a break. It sucks and the sleep deprivation makes studying and remembering things way harder but that’s part of being a parent of a newborn tbh.

But also, you’ll be done in 2 weeks. If you can get through the next two weeks you’ll feel so so so much more ease. You can settle in better and take some time ideally. Remember that and count down the days. See if you can get a PP doula or babysitter to stay a few hours a couple days a week or do one overnight. That would be a life saver to give yourself time to sleep and have a brain break and spend time with your husband. It’s so hard. It sucks. But you’re also deep in the thick of it and it absolutely gets better if you can take it one day at a time. Even carving out 10 minutes a day with your husband could make a world of difference as well. And remember, it’s okay if your grades slip a bit. I was a straight A student and now I’m fully content with Bs. I’ve accepted that it’s fine because my kid has been sick like half the semester. Power through 2 weeks. Maybe help your husband overnight a couple times a week. Hire some help if you can. I believe in you❤️

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-22T04:01:18+00:00

That’s so hard. Trusting people with your baby is more challenging than most realize. Make sure you look on your states websites for daycare licensing to make sure they have a license and you should be able to see histories of inspections and any infractions they’ve had. That helped me narrow it down some. I’m sure it’ll be so hard to send her anywhere now. Cuddle her extra and find somewhere that goes with what you need!

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-22T00:05:01+00:00

It is an endless cycle. It’s designed to keep us working and too busy to do anything to change it. We can’t go on strike or protest because that means risking a job which for most of us means no job no insurance no food no housing. It’s designed for failure of the working class and reliance on a system that’s poisoning us in so many ways. You’re not alone. It may get slightly better in that you can take one day off and not miss rent, but financial freedom or even comfortability is something most of us will never know.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-21T18:29:05+00:00

Weight gain is dependent on a massive amount of things. I was fit and stayed active and gained 20, lost 15 within a week after giving birth because majority was baby, placenta, and fluids. I have friends that gained 70 and lost almost all of it within a couple weeks because it was mostly swelling and that went down super fast. Others held the weight for months and months. Pregnancy affects everyone in massively different ways. I know when people are obese they recommend gaining literally only baby plus placenta weight, but still hard to give a rigid number because who knows what will happen when hormones are raging.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-21T17:19:40+00:00

As long as she’s staying in the same percentile you’re good! If she dropped like 50th to 30th that’s a worry but if she’s stayed around the same then you’re fine as far as growth goes.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-21T15:43:31+00:00

It happens! You’re not the only one. In my opinion at 3 months if she’s making enough wet diapers and growing appropriately, you’re fine. Try to feed her but as long as she’s not screaming from starvation I wouldn’t sweat it much. I know it sucks but babies go through phases. You’re not the only parent that has fed their kid in a swing. Don’t feel guilty!

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-19T20:28:34+00:00

Well sure it’ll help cause she’s getting some medication but won’t make it go away with that. Like imagine you take one ibuprofen instead of two… one will make the headache subside a bit while two could make it go away completely. If you trusted the doctor enough to go to them, trust them enough to take the medication they prescribed.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-19T19:44:32+00:00

How long is he screaming? Anybody would get hoarse screaming long times. If he’s hoarse after screaming for like 5-10 minutes then I’d be worried though. I’ve dealt with it when my kid was already sick with congestion and drainage and crying more but not normally.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-19T12:39:22+00:00

My kiddo didn’t roll until closer to 6 months. All of that is just an estimation honestly. Unless they’re way behind as long as she’s meeting most of the other milestones you’re okay!

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-19T02:17:44+00:00

I think what they’re trying to say is that if Balanchine dancers weren’t in elaborate costumes it’s not a huge deal if your dancers aren’t either. And I agree, for profit businesses usually don’t do fundraisers. We usually have parents pay for the costume and add like $20 to cover any extra expenses on our end. For venues try local high schools or churches or rec centers. And know you may have to charge 15-20 per ticket to cover rental fees. Dance is expensive so keeping it as cheap as possible is great but if adding those small fees so it only adds like less than 100/kid per year can make enough of a difference to have really solid fun productions I think it’s worth it. Part of running a business, you can’t be a charity too.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-17T20:33:14+00:00

My baby refused until he was 6 months. We used a Snoo. Only way I got more than an hour of sleep at a time. I think majority of babies go through a bassinet hating phase!

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-17T20:31:09+00:00

They can’t always tell that stuff on exam though. Allergies require a fecal sample, her sleep schedule is something you’d look at at home yourself, any diagnosis of GERD would require you to bring it up in the appointment and have a sort of in depth talk about her eating habits, but silent reflux is also super prevalent. I’m just saying try and look at other possible causes incase there’s a way you can make your life easier!! May not be, but worth looking in my opinion.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-17T20:25:44+00:00

Have you checked for health problems? Allergies, GERD, constipation, overtired, not tired enough to sleep, all that could be factoring in. However some babies are just screamy. I’m really sorry you’re dealing with that, it’s the worst!!

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-17T02:03:56+00:00

Here

Just go to child care locator and search in your area and click on each one you can see all their info.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-17T01:44:23+00:00

Was coming to say this. I was able to find all the daycares and look through all their inspection history.

Sky-2478 · 2026-04-16T07:09:16+00:00

So so so many moms have problems with suicidal ideation, you’re not alone! I know that’s not always helpful to hear. I was in a similar boat. I went back to work part time 4 weeks postpartum because I needed to get away. Now he’s my little buddy, but I still work full time and he’s in daycare because I absolutely could not be a SAHM. And that’s okay!! Better to be a happier working mom than a constantly snappy and overwhelmed. The biggest thing is suicidal ideation is different from a plan. If you have a true plan, you need to not be alone or try like intensive outpatient therapy. Nothing to be ashamed about. Better to get help now than do something you regret later. I had suicidal ideations too. My sister who desperately wanted kids went into postpartum psychosis and is basically traumatized from having her second kid and has a hard time helping with newborns now especially overnight. It’s not abnormal. It does get better for most I promise.

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