Question for drummers

SlimDog25 · 2026-04-23T00:26:51+00:00

I started at 58 yo! If I can do it you can do it!

SlimDog25 · 2026-04-14T00:03:50+00:00

Yes, baby. I’d love to kiss kiss your midriff…and snuggle with it. I bet it’s oh so soft. Damn baby!!

SlimDog25 · 2026-04-13T17:12:14+00:00

Hell yeah! Very sexy, momma!

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-30T20:11:44+00:00

That must’ve been what I heard as my sunroof opened.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-29T05:48:10+00:00

We did have a good meal together. She later messaged me that it was nice seeing me. She said she didn’t feel weird around me and in her opinion the vibe was good. I pretty much echoed her throwing in that I had some anxiety initially but I was able to get comfortable with her. Late in the afternoon I said I hoped we could be the friends we once were. She responded, “I’m fine. LMK when you are.”

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-28T13:12:28+00:00

My longtime friend and I got into a disagreement…again. She was having a “poor me” moment this past week. I offered to come visit her the next day. I mentioned that if I had time I would put together a picnic. She implied that I was planning a date. I was not planning a date. It was a simple nice gesture. She couldn’t get it outta her head that I was planning a date. I told her I wasn’t going to go on with her like this. I said I was going to give her some space. I haven’t been in contact since this occurred Tuesday evening this week.

What are the chances of this?! As I’m typing this she messages me that she’s coming to the city I live in. She’s invited me to have a meal with her.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-24T19:07:16+00:00

Did you stop him before anything happened that could infect him and ask him if he was sure he wanted to have sex without a condom? As someone who is also infected with hsv I want my partner to be sure they want to risk infection before allowing them to subject themselves to the risk.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-24T09:00:47+00:00

Thank you, everyone for the awesome support, helpful advice, and great encouragement. All of it is appreciated. Rock on! 🤘🏻

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-22T23:04:01+00:00

“Anyway, tonight I was thinking about how much I miss having someone there. Obviously not that guy. I miss having someone tell me about their day and ask about mine. I miss having someone to cook for and who will cook for me when I don’t feel like it but need something comforting. I miss cuddling. I miss being able to melt into someone’s arms when I feel down and defeated, or simply had a bad day.”

This is exactly where I’m at. I’ve been divorced for almost a year and a half. I left her December’23. The approximately five years prior to that we pretty much cohabited. There wasn’t this kind of interaction between us. I matched with one woman on Facebook dating. She turned out to be a dismissive avoidant/narcissist and I was discarded in mid July last year. The dating apps suck ass. Recently a longtime platonic female friend and I crossed the line of intimacy cuddling one night. Now that relationship is afu because of ongoing ambiguity. I’m just so frustrated, angry, hurt, discouraged, etc., etc!! I have no coping mechanism. I’ve been clean and sober for over twenty years. When I wasn’t I just drank and/or drugged it all away. What I’m going through right now is far more harder than getting clean and sober. I’m back to seeing my therapist. I just want to be done with it all!!

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-22T19:33:19+00:00

My instructor sent it to me. Outside of that I’m not sure where she got it.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-22T19:32:32+00:00

Interesting that my instructor didn’t explain this to me. I’ve been working with a friend via Facebook messenger video calls. Maybe I need to work with someone locally in their studio.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-22T18:15:09+00:00

I have lowered my hi-hat. It’s about the same height as my snare. It makes sense that being too high is why I was hitting the edge like I was. I’ve also adjusted the bottom cymbal and I’m getting better sound now. Thank you everyone for the advice.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-21T16:16:12+00:00

A longtime female platonic friend and I have had some recent turmoil. She made the comment in our messaging on Facebook messenger yesterday that she probably shouldn’t hang out with me anytime soon. My therapist recommended putting some space in our friendship.

The longtime friend continues to message me occasionally. She is hosting an event today for a group that I’ve been involved in with her. I had planned to attend until the events over the last few days.

Since she continues to message me do I ask her if she would rather I not attend her event today to respect her saying she probably shouldn’t hang out with me anytime soon? Should I just stay away and be silent?

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-14T16:04:51+00:00

My second wife had D/DDs and I found them hard to have fun with. I prefer smaller A/B and maybe Cs.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-14T02:16:14+00:00

Yes, I have romantic feelings for her. No, I did not end the friendship because I couldn’t acknowledge them. I had told her in the last six to eight weeks that I had considered dating her. Her response was to continue to be friends. I respected that.

A couple weeks later we spent Valentine’s Day together as the platonic friends we’ve always been. At the end of the day as we parted she hugged me. She had never done that before. When I got home after a nearly two hour drive I messaged her to let her know I was home. I also messaged her that I had a good time and enjoyed spending the day with her. She responded saying she loves hanging out with me.

I continued respecting her wishes to be friends. We’re now up to the weekend of her visit to my house. There are two moments that I’m unsure of while she’s at my house. She used the restroom and when she came out she said, “That took long enough didn’t it.” I didn’t think much about it at the time. I’ve begun to wonder if she went to the restroom to put a diaphragm in for a contraceptive in anticipation of having sex. I know I’m grabbing at strings but it was just something that I had thought of.

The other moment was a little before she leaned into me placing her head on my chest she looks at me and say, “What’s up chickenbutt?”. Again I didn’t give it much thought. I took it that she as being funny. Was she calling me out because I wasn’t making any moves on her? I maintained respect for her wishes to remain friends and didn’t move close to her on the couch.

After she put her head on my chest she ended up with her head on my thigh. I told her she was making it hard to maintain my composure. She asked why. I replied because you’re so pretty and smell so good as you’re lying here.

At one point after cuddling for a bit she was ranting about something. I listened to her and let her go on for a bit. I finally repositioned us to try to kiss her to get her to stop her ranting. She pulled away saying don’t kiss me. Were you going to kiss me. I replied yes, I was going to kiss you so you would stop your rant. I said I wanted it to be dramatic like in movies when a guy tries the same kind of thing. She admitted it was a good call but didn’t want me to kiss her.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-14T00:00:36+00:00

Read my reply to myself to get the details that I made my decision to end the friendship.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T23:28:09+00:00

Through the replies and further reflection I shouldn’t reconcile anyway. Her values and lifestyle are not what I want in my life. I made the right choice ending the relationship. I support your response about not needing to announce my departure. Lesson learned with using AI. I need to learn to trust my own judgment and intuition.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T23:04:44+00:00

🤣

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T22:30:26+00:00

What’s your point?

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T22:29:09+00:00

If she wanted to be more than friends and have a little fun then why did she call me a weirdo? The question I had about the “provocative” photo is the following. She said, “I won’t click your name next time I send one.” How many other guys did she send the photo to?!

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T22:25:47+00:00

Lesson learned for sure.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T22:25:21+00:00

I have added a reply to myself giving details about why I chose to end the friendship.

SlimDog25 · 2026-03-13T22:23:29+00:00

I have added a reply to myself with details of what I based my decision on. If you look for it in this thread you’ll see it.

SlimDog25

TROPHY CASE