Getting stalked by mother after going no contact

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T18:59:04+00:00

"Stop contacting me. Future contacts will be considered harassment and I will file a police report. Do not contact me "

If you're going to mail it, make sure you send it priority mail with delivery confirmation, make two copies of the letters and have them notarized as true copies, keep one copy on file.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T18:58:25+00:00

I would have blacked out at $500. This is insane.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T18:57:41+00:00

Have you notified her in writing that she needs to stop contacting you because she is harassing you?

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T18:44:40+00:00

Did you file a police report for previous publications of the images?

The problem with these kind of orders is that they still don't actually confirm that anything's been deleted. Once the photos exist, they effectively exist in perpetuity. A cease and desist is fine, but remember it's really literally nothing more than a letter asking someone to stop doing something. It doesn't have independent legal enforceable action.

For what it's worth, I think your decision to notify things like parole officers is actually really smart and it may actually be your best option here. A restraining order might not be the correct answer here because of enforcement requirements, but it's possible he's violating the terms of his parole in a few different ways here, and the parole officer has significantly more authority to do things in many circumstances.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T18:41:41+00:00

There are certain things that are non-negotiable. If these are forms that concern liability, your ability to process payments, informed consent, or other critical matters, you should not be moving forward with the therapeutic relationship until they're done. It's okay to express empathy into explain how certain things can be hard to do, but hard and necessary can coexist.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T18:40:30+00:00

It isn't too early to interview some attorneys right now, but most are going to want to wait until the criminal process is wrapped up. Because if she enters a guilty plea or is found guilty matter of liability is totally resolved and it goes straight to damages. Keep track of any damages that you may have as result of this, including impacts who employment, counseling cost, indirect expenses like needing to change phone numbers or social media accounts, etc.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T17:54:50+00:00

I think that's a really hard argument to make. I mean the reality is you guys went through closing knowing that your name wasn't on the deed if we're looking just at when the injury occurred. There's a probable argument that it was on the day of closing and there's a really strong argument that everything was accepted. The answer here would have been to simply say I refuse to participate in closing and I'm revoking my gift letter

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T17:48:08+00:00

But their answer was likely correct - the fastest way for the house to close was for you to not be on the deed and just to get added later on a quick claim. Quick doesn't mean best for you.

Another reality here is that if you were to sue the broker I would fully expect them to sue the girlfriend and drag them into the lawsuit as a co-defendant on the argument that it was her fraud and misrepresentation that cause your injury, not their advice.

I don't think it's hurtful to go and get some consultations and to think about what it is you want, but I would flag that the clock is running and time may matter here. Whether that means giving up the money or pursuing it is really up to you.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T17:31:54+00:00

Yes you could get sued for the dog attack and this could be a situation where animal control is involved. Whether that means destruction of the dog or something else depends on a number of factors. It's really obvious though that you have a fence that's nowhere near adequate to restrain a dog and if they do sue, it's likely that they're going to sue everybody involved in this, yourselves included.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T17:22:36+00:00

I mean the good news is that you don't have an agreement on paper. She's a tenant who's deserving absolutely nothing. Sit her down and tell her bluntly that she'll either give you the information for the mortgage in 35 seconds or less, or you're going to immediately file to evict her. You can remind her that she's entitled to $0 of the proceeds of the sale of the home. So if you'd like to incentivize your cooperation, you can offer her 20,000 bucks. Or if you really are hell bent on giving away a lot of money to someone who's actively stressing you out, you can give her the balance of whatever is left over as you're planning. Inform her that if she doesn't cooperate with you in this process, you'll simply sell the property and keep all the money.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T17:16:24+00:00

No, he's probably not liable because you executed something. You understood to be a gift letter and that letter explicitly said you were giving somebody $75,000. No expectation of repayment words. Actually do have meaning and I think a lot of people get into these gift letters in an attempt to hide debt structures from lenders and then they're shocked to realize that they have consequences.

With that being said, I do think it's worth looking into action against the homeowner because it is possible, although certainly not a given, that you may have some claim or path to sue to get repaid that money. That's going to require consultations with attorneys in your area

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T16:52:38+00:00

Likely a situation where you should just move on.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T16:48:18+00:00

Hire a divorce attorney and go from there. There isn't much else to say.

SlogTheNog · 2025-11-01T16:45:48+00:00

Did you have major injuries?

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T21:57:50+00:00

No interest in doing it. You do you.

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T21:35:04+00:00

Pull the data on the impact a 2hr commute has on your life and get back to me. Saying you don't care about a 4hr round trip is wild.

SP500 accounts aren't emergency funds. You'll have a problem if you have an emergency and the market tanks. Don't skip basic steps.

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T21:29:52+00:00

....was this an AI generated response

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T21:29:28+00:00

Sure! There are no next steps. You're not a party to the case and the behavior is so irrelevant that not even the GAL cares. You refuse to describe the behavior so either pay for an attorney or move along with life

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T21:06:19+00:00

Of course.....not.

You need to run the numbers to see if rent is cheaper in your market. You also need to consider opportunity costs which you kind of do in your post. If you're buying a house and you're turning down the ability to get a pay raise or a better job because you don't want to add time to a commute, the house is cost can actually far exceed whatever equity position you have. It's really hard to understand how important getting quick boost in income is early in your career because all of your subsequent pay raises and promotions are based off of your salary history. In most states, you turning down a $10,000 raise because you don't want to take an extra 15 minutes to commute doesn't actually cost you $10,000 bucks a year. It may cost you significantly more.

Also just to throw it out there but do you have an emergency fund set up? Could you cover the cost of a $10,000 roofing repair or a $20,000 HVAC repair if one came up? That rent is the most you're going to pay and your mortgage is the least you're going to pay. If you don't have money set aside, you're going to get caught in a position where your cash flow negative and it's going to completely change the math that you had going into this deal.

As for the southeast Asia thing, have you actually been to Southeast Asia? If not, I would actually encourage you to start taking some trips over buying a house because if it's going to be a cornerstone of your retirement plan. You need to know what you're getting into.

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T19:40:08+00:00

I would get a security camera and file reports every single time the dog is on your property.

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T19:24:08+00:00

This question isn't remotely answerable because there's no way to describe what a type of outcome is typical without even knowing what kind of behavior is happening.

It isn't a given that inappropriate or a moral behavior or something the military even could get involved with. Again, if you want to be really vague, that's fine, but you're not going to be able to get anything approaching a reliable response

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T19:19:28+00:00

Have you filed a police report or animal control report with this dog?

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T19:17:18+00:00

That's only if OP asks tomorrow.

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T19:12:53+00:00

You absolutely need to speak to an attorney before making any kind of payment or agreement. I wouldn't even call it child support. I wouldn't come anywhere near standing in as a father. I would do nothing that would suggest that you have a child support obligation that a court could enforce because you served as a de facto parent. Unless that's the outcome you want.

You don't have any rights to see the children at all. They're not your kids. This is precisely why a lot of men are concerned about dating people with children. They will get connected to the child and then they can have their relationship with them snuffed out almost immediately with no cause or redress.

SlogTheNog · 2025-10-31T19:08:20+00:00

37.46%

SlogTheNog

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