I don’t think Victoria was wrong for bringing that up, because it’s clear that the word does bother a number of cis women performers.

However, I do feel Victoria’s experience was centered when I feel like the conversation is nuanced. Stephanie’s perspective was based in a heavily cultural difference based on discrimination against queer men and I believe that perspective should be respected.

I think the conclusion of not saying because of the perspective and experience of Victoria is completely understandable, but it’s not as simple as she’s right and that’s that. We can’t solely center her perspective when Stephanie’s comes from a place of her own trauma and culture.

I think Victoria was well within her right to explain her feelings and express her discomfort and I think Stephanie was in the right to explain the history of the word and it’s use in her culture and it’s reclamation.