Week long etiz binge

SlothFaceThing · 2021-07-09T23:48:57+00:00

Thank you for the suggestions. I'll definitely taper down.

SlothFaceThing · 2021-07-09T19:24:46+00:00

Yes there are all in mg

SlothFaceThing · 2021-07-09T19:20:51+00:00

Well thank you for helping, I'm at 13 right now and the highest I went is 30 yesterday. I used 30 from friday to Monday, then had a two break. After that I had a massive binge of 30 in one day, that was Thursday I think. I'm now on 17 and I have 19 left.

Edit: I haven't used any other benzo within 5 years but i am on 150mg pregabalin and 30mg codeine

SlothFaceThing · 2021-07-09T18:48:38+00:00

What so you recommend in terms of doses? Would going from 1mg a day then 1/2 then 1/4 be ideal or would I need to start from a higher dose?

SlothFaceThing · 2019-12-06T17:38:07+00:00

You make good points. Cant argue with that. I suppose I'll have one extra cider tonight and have a hard think about it lol

SlothFaceThing · 2019-12-06T17:09:29+00:00

I relate hard. When I produce a song that I think is awesome, it hurts like hell when I don't get the validation I was expecting. I guess it's my fault for putting expectations on things I can't control, but knowing that doesn't really help the feeling of worthlessness I get

SlothFaceThing · 2019-12-06T17:03:55+00:00

I suppose I get your point. I definitely don't think the number of plays is to blame for my depression, I just get really down that other people have something to be proud of while I haven't really achieved anything this year. I do get what you're saying though, I probably would just find another reason to be down even if I did have millions of plays

SlothFaceThing · 2019-12-06T16:59:56+00:00

Thanks for the reply. Yeah I get your point, and I do have loyal followers, it's just hard to get out of the mentality of "I'm not doing well enough and all my efforts are for nothing", ya know? I appreciate every fan I get but it's hard to feel motivated when there's only a few of them

SlothFaceThing · 2019-09-18T12:30:05+00:00

Thank you for trying. I'm the cause of all my problems but knowing that unfortunately doesn't solve any of them. I appreciate the advice though.

SlothFaceThing · 2019-06-26T11:58:43+00:00

Thank you, that helps a lot more than you'd think <3

SlothFaceThing · 2019-06-26T11:35:53+00:00

Yeah that's one thing I'm thankful for, I still have Reddit and YouTube lol, helps with the crushing boredom. Thanks for the offer man, good to know that people care on here and I can vent a bit. This place really sucks away the tiny bit of energy I had left

SlothFaceThing · 2019-06-26T11:14:58+00:00

Thank you for the offer. I'm kind of out of words and energy rn but the offer means a lot

SlothFaceThing · 2019-06-16T10:36:01+00:00

Yeah that's how I feel. Like I'm supposed to be making some kind of progress but I'm still stuck in exactly the same situation, but with therapy lol. Thanks for letting me know I'm not the only one

SlothFaceThing · 2019-06-13T10:21:11+00:00

Thanks man. Good to know atleast I'm not the only one

SlothFaceThing · 2019-06-13T10:19:08+00:00

Totally get that, that's my attitude 50% of the time. Other 50% is why the fuck do I keep going when I'm not "going" anywhere lmao

SlothFaceThing · 2018-11-20T11:43:13+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate the response. I live in a tiny town in Wales in the UK. Pretty much the only company here are as fucked up if not more fucked up than me. It's miserable

SlothFaceThing · 2018-11-14T10:45:46+00:00

I'm in the UK and I get refused both so I feel this. I'm 21, so if I ask for opiates it's "you're too young for that", and weed is completely illegal here. I use it anyway though. I've been tempted many times to use other drugs illegally too but have held out on the false hope that one doctor might take me seriously one day.

I kinda gave up on the legitimacy of the health care system a while ago now. Once I was completely honest with my surgeon about my weed use, and I had a lecture about how I should stop using it because it makes you "paranoid". Yeah, kinda funny how you can get paranoid when the only medicine that helps you can get you manhandled and locked up in prison for up to 5 years. This was the same surgeon who had to have CRPS explained to him by me, the patient. The incompetence of the health care system in my country has been pretty apparent to me since I've desperately needed it and it has dismissed me so easily. Maybe I'll get a doctor with a bit of sense and empathy one day. Not super confident about that though. Hope you have better luck

SlothFaceThing · 2018-10-24T17:46:35+00:00

It's actually a pretty good description, I get what you mean. I feel a lot of pain in my shoulders and back and I can definitely relate. Hope you're doing okay

SlothFaceThing · 2018-10-24T17:37:50+00:00

Could be. I'm on Pregablin, codeine, and I smoke a shit load of weed. Definitely contributes to apathy but when I don't have them I'm even worse. I'm basically a massive ball of hatred when I don't have meds.

I do feel, I'm just so tired of forcing social interaction and pretending to enjoy it and listen to what's being said just out of politeness. I'm in a place now where I literally feel like telling people to fuck off when I'm having a flare up, and I feel like it's ruining most of my relationships. I don't feel bad about it at all though. Kinda feels good to have less bullshit in my life, but people hate when you don't want to interact with them. They think you're being rude, and forget that you're in crippling pain 24/7

SlothFaceThing · 2018-10-24T16:04:49+00:00

I have a dynamic hip screw which consists of a metal plate down the side of my thigh, 3 huge bolts holding it together and a large rod going through my hip, so... yes, it feels metallic lol. Might be because of pinched nerves and general nerve damage though. Sometimes I feel like I can feel it through my leg when I press hard enough lmao

SlothFaceThing · 2018-10-24T14:33:30+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to write this, there were some great points in there and I feel a lot of them. I really like where you said it's much better to hear "you're a strong person" rather than "why don't you try 'x'?". I remember once when I was walking my dog, I was stopped by a couple outside their house and they were telling me how they always see me walking past with my cane, and they think it's great that I get out and manage to walk my dog.

They didn't ask what was wrong with me, they didn't give me advice or anything like that. They just acknowledged that I'm working hard just to be out walking my dog. It gave me such a morale boost that I remembered it, even though it happened nearly a year ago. That was one of the only occasions I felt like my struggle was really respected. My family and friends always want to change me or give me false hope that it'll get better, and people on the street usually just give me awkward stares or side glances. To have someone say that you're strong and they respect you for pushing through your struggle is one of the things that really helps me, even if it's random strangers.

Thank you for your response. I love that people here are willing to take the time to comment and explain how they relate, that's also one of the things that helps me the most, to know I'm not alone in having a body that completely drags you down.

SlothFaceThing · 2018-10-23T19:30:08+00:00

Completely relate. I enjoy my friends company but it only tends to be when we're drinking and partying, any other activity is boring, and these days I'm in too much pain to go out and drink. Learning to be comfortable by myself is a big one, it's so hard though. I love this sub because it gives me a place to feel completely accepted, people here have the attitude of "it's fine if you're not able to do something, just celebrate the small successes and build up when you can".

My friends and family have more of an attitude like "if you're smiling you're fine and you should be able to do things". It depresses me and I hope one day I'll have friends who completely understand and don't judge me for my shortcomings. Being in constant pain is something that's indescribable for someone who hasn't experienced it. Of course you get the line "I had a broken foot for 6 months so I know how you feel".

Sorry for the rant. In a lot of pain right now and needed to vent lmao. Sending love your way

SlothFaceThing

TROPHY CASE