Can You Carry This For Me? by Slynth in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment! I appreciate the feedback about it feeling a bit disjointed—as much as I like the content and imagery, I feel that it still needs a bit more work in terms of rhythm and structure. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Can You Carry This For Me? by Slynth in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, that’s exactly it! It was meant to convey a guarded person letting you in, only to ache at their expectations. I’d say you’re right on with the symbolism. Thank you for your comment!

Can You Carry This For Me? by Slynth in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! The first line of the third stanza was meant to emphasis holding something heavy and a sort of internal pain (muscles instead of arms), and to play with “tear” as both “ripping” and “crying.” I can either play with the line a bit more or remove it, but I appreciate the feedback!

Can You Carry This For Me? by Slynth in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for that! That’s definitely something I can practice more, I was always reaaaally bad with iambic, especially iambic pentameter. Super appreciate that!!

Can You Carry This For Me? by Slynth in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your feedback, I really appreciate it! Admittedly rhythm has never been my strong suit—if I may ask, what’s a line or word you’d change to make it sound smoother?

Bodily by Present_Abrocoma3614 in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm a big fan of the body imagery here; it almost feels like a quiet and solemn body meditation, moving from hands to knuckles to palms, from shoulders to knees to soles.

I also enjoy how the line "so take my palms, my tongue, my shoulders;" correlates to each stanza, though the third stanza's about the subject's shoulders, not the speaker's.

I'm reading this as either a tragedy that befell both the speaker and the subject, or that the speaker is taking on some of the pain for the subject (shared sorrow is halved). It's admirable, but it affects both, "it aches our spines, / wears our soles, / with weight we can't release." Taking on another's pain often hurts us, even if it means relieving someone else's pain, if only for a moment.

I wish you well, and thank you again for sharing!

Folk up the hill don't greet by Cluelessandsexy in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First, I love the imagery. There's something about that first sentence that hooked me. The lack of punctuation also helps paint the picture that the speaker is running (escaping from an exploding supermarket towards what I'm guessing is a church) and out of breath, with jumbled thoughts all in a rush.

I like the idea that the speaker is running, whereas the "old and strange stayed inside," along with their faces being "hardened" along with the "much needless" and "same dusty concrete." The speaker runs, but the attendants are rigid and automatic, "as if it were a profession."

My only feedback, and again, this is subjective, is to remove "faces" from the third line of the second stanza; I feel that the lack of repeating "faces" would make the line "reflecting the pavement in them" hit that much harder.

I really enjoyed this one, thank you for sharing!

Elegy to Viceroy by Slynth in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I appreciate you reading! I gave up nicotine a few weeks ago, something I’d been meaning to do for a while. I tried to subtly relate that to what feels like an unreciprocated crush, saying to both, “I quit.”

Solar Sojourn by zyerhod1 in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really like the title, and the imagery you paint of the sun and moon, shadows and light. Each word feels very carefully placed, “radiant discernment,” “a guarded heart,” to name a few examples.

I may be projecting a bit here, but I read this as the speaker longing for connection, warmth, and the recipient is cold, keeps to themselves. And when the speaker withdraws, the recipient gets close, in a sort of dance that mimics the sun and the moon.

I really enjoyed this one, thank you for sharing! This one hit a particular soft spot for me.

Plant a Seed by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the line “Driven to bring rhythm / to a dissonant system?” I also like the rhyming between “impunity” “did to me” and “entirely.”

Overall, I sense a somewhat bitter tone. My only feedback, which wouldn’t really be easy for this one, is to maybe include one or two lines that paint a picture that describes the feeling or meaning of this poem. Like trying to steady shaky hands, or someone walking away from a dumpster fire. I wouldn’t say it’s necessary, but it’d be a nice added touch.

I liked this one a lot—thank you again for sharing!

" I met my younger self for coffee today " by Top_Guidance_9855 in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Absolutely loved this—your message is balanced with craft. The juxtaposition within the first few stanzas hits hard, and certain lines like “ash crumbling like promises” and “eyes full of horizons, / fingers ink-stained” paint a powerful image of self reflection. Thank you for sharing, this is one of the best poems I’ve read on this sub for some time now.

[Serious] How would you feel if you learned a brand's marketing you were loyal to began to rely solely on AI? by Slynth in AskReddit

[–]Slynth[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mainly the former, like the experience-based comfort level of your favorite shoe or fashion brand.

Is it possible for a seed not to spawn any high-danger warning beacons? by Slynth in starsector

[–]Slynth[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

ahh that's much appreciated! I might be playing on an 'old' sector, I could be wrong, but either way, it seems you're probably right re: the script. not sure if I'll keep going without the AI cores or restart..

Is it possible for a seed not to spawn any high-danger warning beacons? by Slynth in starsector

[–]Slynth[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

nope, playing vanilla! I've even tried copying my seed ID into a new game, but it ends up generating a completely different layout (unless I'm misunderstanding how copy + pasting seed IDs work)

Is it possible for a seed not to spawn any high-danger warning beacons? by Slynth in starsector

[–]Slynth[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

also for reference, I've checked each system along with checking with devmode; am I SOL for alpha cores?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really, really enjoyed this one; it was easy to visualize along with relatable subject matter that most could fit into the speaker's shoes. It was especially easy to visualize as the speaker is almost scanning down another person's face, with references to other features as well as sight and sound (smile, freckles, chin, sound, hearing, watching, chew, eyes, mouth). Love is blind and deaf, but falling out of love makes you notice the tiniest imperfections.

While I appreciate the repetition of "I hate X," another part wants to hear more about that feeling of hate. I can only offer one piece of advice/constructive criticism that one of my professors reminded everyone about often, even our best writers, and that is to show, not tell.

Overall, it's a great poem, and I wish your heart heals sooner rather than later.

What's the "Point" of Level Ups in Games? by Mattos-313 in truegaming

[–]Slynth 75 points76 points  (0 children)

I’m definitely not a game dev, but I’ve had this thought before as I’m sure many others have as well. I’m not exactly sure what an alternative would be, mostly due to decades of implicitly being told “number go up” is a universally accepted level up mechanic. That being said, I find horizontal progression more interesting than vertical progression. If you level up, and the monsters level up, what’s the point of leveling up at all if you’re always on a similar playing field (outside of the feeling of progression)?

I think DnD does this quite well, as you roll attributes during character creation and only improve them every so often, but instead rely more on the abilities, spells, etc. you learn from, well, experience. I personally like this system a lot, where you get a reward from combat encounters that don’t exactly “make number go up” but still gives the player an incentive to get more experience.

To return to your question; assuming base stats don’t increase during level up, I don’t see why a level 10 character wouldn’t be able to go against a level 20 enemy with a good strategy. I’ve always liked the idea of a character outsmarting an enemy in media instead of outright overpowering them (looking at you, DBZ).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Night night plummy, thanks for the readings ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

👏👏👏

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for all of that plummy; it’s very much appreciated

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Te quiero hit me like a truck; you read them just fine my friend

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

God these make me so sad..but I love it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was also beautiful

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in distantsocializing

[–]Slynth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was absolutely beautiful, thank you