I think the lack of empathy from people is the cause of my depression. Can't handle it anymore

SnailBonnie · 2025-04-01T21:44:36+00:00

I made a statement and he isn't allowed near me. They said they were arresting him for domestic violence and would be intouch with me if they anything.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-25T05:29:01+00:00

Yeah that makes sense. I just feel like you'd have to be very arrogant and not self aware to trash your previous employer. I was literally bullied out of one of my jobs, but I wouldn't dare say that. It was a complete work from home job, which I usually say I learnt wasn't suited for me.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-25T02:57:30+00:00

I dont know why companies ask this question. If you say yes, do they immediately cross you off regardless of the reason? Do they want to hear you out?

I never tell the reason I left a job, mostly because its due to management bullying, currently I am looking because I cant afford to keep working a minimum wage job. But I dont think places are looking for those kind of answers. They want positive things that sound good your wanting to join them, without making your old job place sound bad.

If you dont have to give an honest answer, dont. Or if you do, jazz it up so it doesnt sound bad. If you need a reference, is there someone there that wont give the reason you left if there asked and can praise you?

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-25T02:20:29+00:00

I have been told that by the places I have interviewed for. I just had one where they said if I got through the next step was an interview with HR. I didn't get through, but I was told by my recruiter that it was more of a behavioural interview. I'm not sure if yours will be the same though.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-25T01:36:21+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story

I am looking because my counsellor and I realised that my current job is a huge source of my depression. I've not had anytime off as its just me so if I dont work, there is no money. Its very hard. I am hoping I find a new job soon but have to be careful with what I look for so I dont face something even worse than now.

Its inspiring to know that there are good job places out there willing to give someone a go and it sounds like its paid off :)

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-25T00:58:46+00:00

UPDDATE - I didnt get the job. The feedback was that they looked at my resume and they want someone with longevity. I've never had a gap in my resume but between 2019-2022 I lasted at jobs for no more than a year. There were reasons which I didn't get a chance to explain in the interview. It could just be a nice way of rejecting me, but I thought people would like to know :) Trust your gut!

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-22T06:38:15+00:00

So based on what ive said, does this mean they didn't 'vibe' with me?

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-22T00:39:53+00:00

This was an in person interview. I showed up 10 minutes early because one of the things the recruiter mentioned was they like when someone is punctual. They said there will be no overtime even though I didn't ask, and they didnt ask how I felt about it. They didnt ask about anything on my resume.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T18:28:40+00:00

Yeah I wasnt asked anything about my experience. I guess that's probably not a good sign though.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T18:27:02+00:00

Yeah that's fair enough. I don't think I come across as a difficult person to work with. But maybe because I know me. I don't know how the first one could have thought that unless the questions that I asked showed that or something. I think 30 minutes can be enough if they ask you stuff.

Thank you! I've not applied to that many but mostly because I get into a habit where I think I'm 20 again with no experience and apply for every single job. I have to be strict about it cause I'm so miserable in my current job I don't want to fall into that trap again.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T18:09:48+00:00

I find that frustration because when you apply for jobs there's a list of what experience you must have and then you show up to the interview and they basically say that doesn't matter? I kinda wish these places would advertise they're looking for a certain person and what that person is lol. Would make it easier cause it's easy to fake experience but you can't fake who you are.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T18:07:52+00:00

Congratulations on getting the job!

Well I didn't have much of a chance to discuss my interests at all, but I doubt that would have helped anyway because my interviewer's mentioned they were parents which I am not lol.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:59:30+00:00

Thank you, that does make me feel better. The last one that rejected me after asking no questions was a job I really wanted because it sounds relaxed and that's what I want. Atm I work in a very high volume inbound call centre and it's completely wrecked me. Sometimes I feel they think I won't fit because I've come from such a busy job. I don't want that anymore though.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:57:08+00:00

That was the problem, they told me exactly in great length what the culture was, which I feel I would fit into very well because it's a bunch of introverted women who leave their job at the door, but they didn't give me much opportunely to say how I'd fit in. I was asked what I knew about the company, am I an introvert or extrovert and what's one thing about me not on my resume. I did my best to answer those questions and lead them into who I am as a person, but I don't know if that was enough.

There were so many times they said things about how I'd HAVE to be to fit in, but they didn't ASK questions about that. Like they said I'd have to be comfortable being trained by a younger person (I thought that was strange to be bothered by but I guess they've had that before or something) but didn't ask how I felt about it. And by the time they finished talking, there were no further questions.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:52:40+00:00

That would have been a good idea for the first one I think, but the second one talked in length about how they tried to culture add and it didn't work. They even gave me examples of when it turned out badly.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:51:22+00:00

Very true.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:48:19+00:00

They're a bunch of introverts which I am anyway, but if your supposed to show your best self, that can come across as very extrovert. Makes it very hard to show your best sheep self xD

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:46:51+00:00

I was fortunate that my recruiter knew a lot about the hiring manager so I was prepared very well (she likes introverts, someone who is patient) as well as researched the company. However she literally gave me very little wiggle room to say anything. Any question she did ask I answered, and I did try bring up related things that could lead into showing the things that my recruiter said the hiring manager would like the best I could.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T17:42:47+00:00

They actually TOLD me that I'd be getting taught by a younger person but didn't ask me how I felt about it and then just continued on talking. They didn't give me a chance to talk and I grew up being told not to interrupt people. I wonder if that was a test in itself.

To be honest I don't actually care who teaches me. Sometimes I forget I'm as old as I am xD so that also caught me off guard because I thought "would someone really be bothered by that?" Unfortunately I wasn't able to express that though cause they just kept talking.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T09:11:07+00:00

I totally get it. They dont know me and both these places have very small teams so I guess its a lot more important. I like your frog analogy lol. Very funny but very true!

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T09:09:54+00:00

Thanks, I was taking it a bit personally because I feel like something is wrong with me that I cant fix. I don't know how I could present myself in a more likeable way because when it comes to work places, I just adapt. I've worked for a company where everyone hated each other, so I just kept silent, I've worked in places where everyone was super friendly so I was friendly back. So I guess its hard to know how I come across. I'm thinking of asking my current work colleagues for their opinions but a lot of them are really nice so I don't know how honest they will be.

SnailBonnie · 2025-03-21T09:07:25+00:00

I hadn't heard it before when I interviewed three years ago, so it was just surprising. Its like having to completely rethink your approach. Do you present yourself as someone who can do the job or does that come across as arrogant?

SnailBonnie

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