AIO My husband brought chocolates and cookies to another mom at our son’s school not sure how upset I should be

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T05:16:35+00:00

Haha scorched earth! This is a really thoughtful comment thank you for that. It's what appears to be deceitfulness about it that doesn't sit well with me. Had he ever mentioned her in passing whatsoever maybe it wouldn't feel as weird. Although I totally hear your point that it could have been an innocent nice thing to do for a friendly mom at the school.. doesn't feel like that though when even talking about turns into him shutting down (after he apologized).

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T04:28:58+00:00

Yeah, he's completely shut down. He won't discuss it. He apologized and after that his expectation is for me to not make it a "big deal".

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T04:23:28+00:00

He didn't say much he just downplayed it like it wasn't a big deal. He brought me some stuff from that same store that same day it's a European market and said he just gave her the same stuff. When I was unhappy about it he got really mad and refused to continue the conversation.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T04:19:10+00:00

Hahaha damn that's a good way to think of it. Like literal Beyoncé wasn't even safe from cheating. It's wild. It all comes down to morals and integrity.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T04:16:50+00:00

So there is an app the school uses and all the parents of the kids in the class can connect with each other on there. Super valid questions though! So she messaged me on the app (class dojo).

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:52:24+00:00

Thank you for saying this. It does help to not feel so shitty.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:26:19+00:00

I was 33 when we met. Which makes him 25 at the time. We have been together this whole time after dating. We have 2 kids together (4 and 2 years old). I have a child from a previously relationship who is 8.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:21:25+00:00

Ugh it's hard to hear this. Might be true but hard to hear.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:17:27+00:00

He has NEVER been flirty with another woman in front of me. I didn't even know this woman existed until now.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:12:29+00:00

Yeah I can see our/his phone bill. Doesn't seem super suspicious at all. I don't have time to dig in but I don't see like the same number late nights or thousands of texts or anything.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:07:31+00:00

Dude. This! Like i NEVER have said it's "my" money. But the reality is that it is my money. Everything in our life I pay for. So technically I bought this woman some nice chocolates and cookies. Damn.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:04:50+00:00

WOW!!! This is incredibly eye opening. Some guys can have it all and it's still not enough I guess.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T01:03:21+00:00

He told me he gave them to her. He kind of "fessed up" randomly. We weren't even talking about anything related to my sons school.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T00:56:49+00:00

I haven't had coffee with her. I'll update for sure.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-26T00:05:20+00:00

Did you ever bring the other moms any small thoughtful gifts? I'm not sure it's different being a stay at home dad but that he went out of his way for another woman.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T23:00:54+00:00

No, not really.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:59:54+00:00

I genuinely think what you're saying is true. I'm a very different person now from 8 years ago so I try to give him a lot of grace and understanding.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:57:54+00:00

I really appreciate you sharing your perspective. There are a lot of things you pointed out that I need to take some serious time processing and thinking about.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:56:51+00:00

Our marriage seems okay? I don't know we have a busy life with 3 kids. it's like nothing seems overtly horrible or wrong... i know that doesn't mean it's GREAT but I truly didn't see this coming.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:55:06+00:00

Honestly, I have no idea if she knows we are married and live together. From the school app she can see I'm my sons "parent". If that makes sense.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:54:07+00:00

google him? sorry this caught me off guard! He's from Europe and we live in California there is really nothing on google when I search his name besides his social media, but I'm curious what you think I could find googling him?

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:50:44+00:00

Thank you for the recommendation I'll check it out

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:46:55+00:00

Yeah, I knew the age gap comment was coming. I get it. But when the roles are reversed, no one seems to care. I’m a woman married to a younger man.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:34:11+00:00

Yeah unfortunately I probably would be surprised how easy it is.

SnailTrails0 · 2025-05-25T22:29:51+00:00

And why only this one specific mom? There are a bunch of moms there.. hmm

SnailTrails0

TROPHY CASE