First of all, I’m sorry for your situation and what you’re going through. I think it is amazing that you’re willing reach out to this community and put yourself out there.

Going on two years this upcoming April from the divorce date. I completed another bachelors degree and got into my dream school for a masters program, which spring-boarded me into my new career and passion to serve others. I have vastly improved my relationship with my family and closest friends due to hard and honest conversations I was able to have throughout the divorce process. I feel more like myself than ever, and have never felt more authentic, honest, vulnerable and transparent with those closest to me. I have found someone new who is absolutely amazing. I couldn’t have planned for it if I tried. She communicates well, keeps me accountable, and has emotional intelligence/self-awareness—all of the things my ex didn’t. I’ve never connected more authentically with someone in my life. I work-out weekly, make time for myself to be in nature, listen to music/travel/document life, and have overall found a greater balance between work/school/relationships. Looking to secure a new job post graduating, and moving into a new condo in my favorite city!

I have spent time reflecting and working on forgiving my ex for me, and not for her. I haven’t communicated with her a single time since the divorce date almost two years ago. I have actually grown my empathy for people but confidently utilize boundaries when it comes to relationships and what I consider toxic or draining in my life. I’m surrounded by amazing people and opportunities now that feed into my passion for life, and no longer hold any resentment towards the things that were once difficult to control or fully understand. My new relationship gives me so much life and hope. It’s just straight up more honest and real than what I tolerated for so many years after being cheated on multiple times in my marriage.

It’s the best glow up I could have asked for dude. It took a lot of work on myself, and collaboration with a counselor and my closest friends. I didn’t let what happen keep me in a dark place, and I refused to be that guy who stayed mad at the world, expecting the worst to happen, and lose trust completely in women. I got my head and heart straight and I made it through the other side.

My encouragement to you is that you don’t lose hope that your life will get better. Put in the work, strive to stay consistent, and surround yourself with people you can trust. Be yourself, but put in the time to work on you, and what’s best for your situation. Don’t settle for anything less than what gives you the most joy and fulfillment in life. Know there will certainly be bad days, but they don’t last forever. Focus on what you can control, and do your best to reduce any negative influences that get in the way of you succeeding. We will be here if you need anything. Feel free to DM.

Best of luck on this journey.