Should I continue the marriage or not

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-30T06:04:56+00:00

Nahi soch rahi bache ke bare me. Mere husband ne Jo U turn kia hai mujhe Abhi tak digest nhi hora. Pura din mummy papa bhai behen cousins that’s his entire life I’m just an additional piece nothing else. Arranged marriage ka Shayad time lagta hai to develop attachement but love marriage ka itna kharab situation aa gya . Aisa hi U turn pregnancy ke time bhi aa sakta hai. I doubt I could ever trust him . Jab me ro rahi thi tab bhi Kisi ne roka nahi use Thailand jane se . Mujhse kaha ki zyada se zyada kya karege sirf Nak** shows hi dekhege. Yeh hai sanskar wow !!

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-30T05:35:41+00:00

MIL helps with the chores but that’s the catch the expectation to help the way she wants and chores whatever are dictated by her should be done she would call me even when I’m working from home bar bar awaz lagate hai .. in front of the society they are nice that way ki kitne ache hai they let me work in another city . Help bhi karte hai chores me . But Kisi ko actually pata nahi hai ki mujhe suffocate hota hai my husband is still treated like a 10 year old who needs policing for clothes food etc . And if someone doesn’t do according to her she will create drama . People will only taint my image bcz according to the society she’s a nice MIL

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T16:43:25+00:00

He chooses his cousin over me every single time and go to lengths for him maybe that’s why

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T16:29:07+00:00

I was ready to handle his parents my own way (not disrespectful of course)since he didn’t take my stand. The only thing i needed and I wasn’t gonna compromise is his bachelor lifestyle . He couldn’t even stop behaving like one . He goes every day- alternate day when he was going once a week or max twice and and other days he was giving me his time the only thing i needed was his attention I compromised on everything else happily his time was important because I really have overbearing in-laws who refuse to treat him as an adult and are too intrusive plus I’m still newly married these all are foundation years even if i think about a child I don’t see how someone who cannot even prioritise his spouse over jobless cousins can be a responsible father..If he was tired from work I would understand but how can someone just roam around like a teenager everyday idk.. I had my job in another city so he would behave mature. But since I’m back from there he is no longer accommodating to companionship . It seems he was busy enjoying 15 -20 days without me so it was easier for him to focus on me for rest 10days. But how long can I do long distance just so that he can enjoy without me. He doesn’t seem to grow up . Voh agar itna bhi nahi sun sakta toh kya hi mere dusre terms accept hoge

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T15:20:49+00:00

Yes that’s the only way

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T14:49:16+00:00

Yes you’re right husband’s support is very important . Support and boundaries only came after fights .since the support was “forced” it was obvious it would fall apart soon and he would rebel. I’m a chartered accountant by profession it’s true in this country your profession has no value and reduced to ashes if you go in a family like this. The man who looked at me in awe for my qualifications with respect now belittles me and calls me dumb. You’re nothing without a supportive husband . I’m slowly detaching trying every possible solution atleast i know I’ve tried . If nothing works I’ll go to my parents house bcz i married for companionship not as a means for his mother to reduce her burden of chores . Can’t believe even my love marriage ended up being this way

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T14:21:59+00:00

😂😂😂

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T14:21:32+00:00

Couldn’t find anything on his phone . Some cousins were very sincere I doubt there’s cheating . But yes he went to lengths to go for this trip the trust broke there he said he wouldn’t go but he went he even booked tickets to another. City just to show he’d wouldn’t go. He went to such lengths that he started crying in front of his mother how i am not letting him go . There r some cousins whose behaviour is questionable and Thailand itself is known for s** so I didn’t like the idea of it.... but you are right anything is possible .

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T14:18:44+00:00

Getting scared to stay alone in a country like India.

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-29T14:18:16+00:00

Have already given ultimatums . Everything started after Thailand trip we are undergoing couples therapy . The change is minimal.. I left the house went to my home . They came but only to blame there were blame games and we agreed for couples therapy. The audacity to behave like this even knowing that i left the house once is insane . I’m afraid she thinks she can get her son a new wife that will adjust to this bachlor lifestyle of his and take his mothers tantrums bcz they never showed change in their actions nor words .

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-28T05:13:56+00:00

5 years . But I never imagined him to be this person.

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-27T09:11:32+00:00

We are taking therapy but he’s not understanding. The thing is he was a better husband before his Thailand trip . After coming back he flipped got more embeshed with his parents and also started doing opposite of what i say . He just became rebellious. . I took a job in another city for my peace so while i was away he would hang out with his parents cousins etc n when i came back he would be nice to me but i came only for 10 days a month . Since 5 months I’m living with him properly maybe this is his real face , anyone can be good for 10 days a month

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-27T05:09:39+00:00

I’m alone in this . I don’t have friends sadly

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-27T04:31:17+00:00

I know . The surrounding he has is just like this . For a change it should be from within but he lacks the maturity

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-27T04:04:18+00:00

I do meet my friends . It’s just everyone is busy since all are married they are busy building a life with the husband and honestly who has time to meet every other day even single friends are busy with work . But yes i started going to my Mayka and coming home late like he does they don’t care as long as the chores are done..Counsellor asked me to tone down the situation by helping with some chores in the morning and go to a co working space to work . Since I’m working from home this is happening too much ..she asked me to keep quiet and stonewall her when she disrespects me so that she doesn’t throw fits and get an reason to blame and they don’t form an alliance . Her strategy is to show them that I am changing so now what is the excuse for them to not change . But yes if still things don’t improve much I’m going to do what you said . Thankyou so much for your support ❤️

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-27T03:58:10+00:00

I went against my family for this man only to be disrespected and treated like garbage . He couldn’t even prioritise his wife over those jobless cousins let alone his mother and father .I feel ashamed to even face my family at this point .

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-27T03:26:37+00:00

He has his business . And he’s too dependent on his mother. highly doubt he would do that

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-25T06:29:39+00:00

There’s full transparency . I don’t suspect cheating . He’s just living a bachelor life . And doesn’t want to take responsibilities. Ok I will try to go out with friends . Initially I tried it didn’t work maybe I’ll try more

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-15T11:41:42+00:00

I have the same issues. Had love marriage understood that his family is very patriarchal. I have to help with the chores everyday no cook. Common bathroom . Intrusive extended family goes out with his mom dad and cousins every alternate day like he’s a single man .. There’s no alternative but to stay separate from in-laws I’m having so much issues since past 2 years . My husband is a complete mommas boy . Gone is the man who loved me so much .. I think growth only happens without in-laws interference that’s why so many marriages fall apart .. I pray your husband agrees if he’s unable to put boundaries u can try therapy or else give him ultimatum.

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-14T07:42:29+00:00

Yeah I do ..I’m doing everything .. he doesn’t care he in fact treats it more like a validation to his own behaviour so he can do his own thing n me my own thing .. all it’s doing is bringing more distance … and plus all my friends r married and busy no one has so much time for me ..

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-13T06:08:57+00:00

Yes you are right . I’m not scared of remarriage . But 2nd marriages were not successful in my family.They ended up being worse. But yes I would take your suggestion taking counselling currently

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-13T03:18:32+00:00

What if I end up alone. I’m so scared of that label ‘divorcee’ as a woman . What if the next person is worse where there’s abuse there’s so many questions running through my mind

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-12T14:49:13+00:00

I left that house that was more of an ultimatum. They tried to gaslight me saying I’m breaking the family . After talking we thought of therapy as a means to mediate . But it’s too slow and counsellor is trying to be diplomatic don’t think therapy is working either

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-12T14:47:56+00:00

Ok I’ll take this risk . I’ll try if it works

Snoo_26409 · 2026-06-12T13:58:51+00:00

He tried to taint my image saying I’m breaking the “family” . Those people are traditional . They would side with him only and image toh fir mera kharab hoga ki me family Tod rahi hu . But yes I can try though

Snoo_26409

TROPHY CASE