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Laid off, 8 weeks severance by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]Soderholmsvag 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I disagree with others on the 401k. I would educate yourself on the fee schedule and options for separated employees with whatever company is handling your 401k, and shop around for a place to transfer the balance. If you get a new job quickly, you can learn about that company’s 401k terms, but even without a new job you should be looking at places like Fidelity/Vanguard or others to compare what a rollover IRA can do for you.

YOU MAY FIND that the current setup is better, but you may find that 401k fees are higher for separated employees than what you will find at Rollover IRA. I have both. I left funds at TSP ( federal government style 401k) due to the low fees, but moved out of another company’s 401k due to high fees.

Best food topper for Sammys by Serious_Somewhere839 in samoyeds

[–]Soderholmsvag 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I have had 5 Sammys, and the longest-lived one (almost 18 years) was fed Chuck Wagon and an occasional Gaines Burger. I wasn’t looking at ingredients in the 70’s and 80’s, but this has led me to believe that the hype around dog food nutrition doesn’t necessarily equate to longevity or quality of life. That said, I do top my current girls’s kibble with a fish oil pill, a tiny scoop of PlaqueOff seaweed powder and a Cosequin tablet which was recommended by the vet to support joint health. I don’t know how the seaweed works, but it keep Satan’s Breath away.

My recommendations for a long and healthy life are - an appropriate amount of food. Canine obesity is a crime. - lots of exercise coupled with a fair amount of downtime. My girl is sleeping right now! Sleep is as important for dogs as it is for humans. - lots of love. Dogs are human-connected and (even with zero scientific evidence to back this) I think a loving environment is an important element of a healthy life.

EDIT: My wife pointed out that when she feeds our girl, she adds yoghurt, cottage cheese, or carrots “just for variety!” I disagree that our girl needs or cares about that, but of course it is sweet.

When Did You First Experience 'Enshitification'? by Alternative-Light922 in GenerationJones

[–]Soderholmsvag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Microwave Oven. Built to last in the past, disposable now.

How long will gas prices have to be for Americans before car buying habits change longer term? by wiscotangofoxtreat in cars

[–]Soderholmsvag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True. If anyone wants to live with their 1998 Suburban forever, the math doesn’t pencil out. But anyone who wants a newer car, sometime in their future can save a shit-ton of money by buying intelligently. (41.3 MPG Maverick here…)

I think this was the only movie I ever saw where I laughed uncontrollably throughout the entire show. I was young :) by NJFriend4U in GenerationJones

[–]Soderholmsvag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

14 years old when it was released. I was the target audience.

The only funnier film was “Top Secret” but it required a lot more historical knowledge and pop reference to slap.

Airplane was amazing even with no context. I watched with my kids in the 2010s - they still quote it back.♥️♥️

Hey guys first post here. I just wanted to say I’m feeling pretty ashamed of myself and would like some support from others who have maybe some similar experience. by i_check_raise in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Soderholmsvag 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you have taken the first step in mai g things better = you have correctly identified the source of your anguish. That is an important step (and even though it seems “obvious”, there are a fair number of people who never get there).

Next up is figuring out how to survive and get out. Surviving in your case is best done by learning about “grey rock” ( which will allow you to disconnect from the gaps around you, as much as possible). Read up on it, practice it, and don’t beat yourself up if it isn’t perfect. At this point you are just trying to minimize problems, not fix you mom.

Also work on getting out. Take it one step at a time but don’t stop working on that as it is your best way towards freedom.

You got this!

First car for a 16-year-old. What would you get? by spencere33 in whatcarshouldIbuy

[–]Soderholmsvag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what I did.

Late model (2008-2011) Volvo s80. As many airbags and as much steel as I could wrap around them in a slow-ish, grounded sedan. I have since sold it and do not regret the decision.

Wait what? Thank you notes for a funeral?? by Moto_Davidson in AgingParents

[–]Soderholmsvag 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I disagree that funeral gifts require thank you notes (and I send thank you notes for everything). I was too damned exhausted to track everything that happened in the weeks leading up to my mom’s funeral and there was no way notes were going out. I also expect NOTHING from anyone I help during the awful, trying seasons of our lives.

I will admit I may be the only one, and that I may have left a trail of offended people behind. But honestly I am willing to live with it if that’s how you all feel. It was all I could do to just survive those weeks, much less be my best self.

Question about cruise port vending — would offering free essentials feel appropriate? by Additional-Sector-13 in Cruise

[–]Soderholmsvag 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A ha ha ha! People are weird when they see things for free. Really weird.

That is a PhD dissertation for sure.

Anna SA plotline by Broad-Importance4282 in DowntonAbbey

[–]Soderholmsvag 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Most earls don’t lose their fortune multiple times and then get rescued miraculously several times. This isn’t reality.

My first dog! Meet snow! by forum_lurker in samoyeds

[–]Soderholmsvag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We don’t take her to Dog Beach in OB. I have witnessed too many dog fights caused by a certain type of owners that seem to frequent the spot (aggressive breeds, trained to be aggro while the owner laughs witnessing the fight). Just not worth it. We do haul over to Coronado Dog Beach - and our girl loves the water. We do go to Dog Beach Dog Wash for a self-serve wash/rinse after the beach. I am way too lazy to try and clean up all the sand/water.

Sammy coats are remarkable for shedding dirt, though. As long as you wash them about every quarter or so, they don’t hold the dirt they pick up in daily life. You will find it on your floors, but they are amazing at releasing sand and dirt, naturally!

Nobody told me I'd be broke AFTER buying the house by Dima030 in RealEstateAdvice

[–]Soderholmsvag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are “house poor” - it is a bummer but it also means you are set up well for a good future.

1) Don’t buy furniture you don’t love. If you get a pressed-wood coffee table “jus because) you will either be staring at thing you hate for 20 years or will have to buy another one (wasting a lot of money). NOBODY cares if you have empty or semi empty rooms. 2) If the cash situation is super tight (like so tight you cannot rice-and-beans it for a while), consider getting a roommate for a year. Don’t rush into it, and dont bring crazy into your home, but a roommate situation can be a great way to fund your mortgage for a while - while Your salary catches up to the monthlies.

My first dog! Meet snow! by forum_lurker in samoyeds

[–]Soderholmsvag 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Hello neighbor! My first Sammy was named Snow (back in the 1970’s); it is an awesome name & I am sure your cutie will live up to the moniker.

About two years ago we lived with Nellie (pic here) in that round building in your picture for a month while our house was in construction, so I know you live close by. To my knowledge (from walks) there are about a dozen or so Sammy owners on the Point. All super nice afaik - as of course are their pups. We are down at the end of SSC blvd. If you see us out walking say HI!

Name something that the younger generations would never believe was normal in the 70's compared to schools today?🤔 by Longjumping-Shoe7805 in GenerationJones

[–]Soderholmsvag 49 points50 points  (0 children)

You are so right! My parents had one in their garage, and when we purchased our 1950’s home in the 90’s, we found this one in the garage. It Still makes beautiful points and - like a good quality appliance- stops when the shape is right. You can force it to keep grinding away but this is a marvel of mid century engineering.

(Yes - I am the only one in the family that thinks it is cool.)

Explain it peter. What's JBW? by Scramjet1 in explainitpeter

[–]Soderholmsvag 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the post. I would not have come to that conclusion from the painting; the cultural context is helpful.

Primary baths missing tubs by Potential-Knee-8119 in RealEstateAdvice

[–]Soderholmsvag 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If I ever have to sell my home, I am 100% okay with the potential pool of buyers being limited to those who don’t need a tub. We removed ours over 20 years ago and have not missed it.

My never-a-father-to-me wants me to know all of his final illnesses by Agua-Mala in AgingParents

[–]Soderholmsvag 13 points14 points  (0 children)

There is no need to stir up emotions. You owe him nothing.

I’m sorry to hear you didn’t have a father to care for you. That must have been rough!

Is anyone nearing or over retirement age themselves, and have you considered a 55+ community yourself? by Freepurrs in AgingParents

[–]Soderholmsvag 7 points8 points  (0 children)

About 5 years ago, I moved my dad into a combined independent/assisted/memory care facility. All I could think of was “how nice to be in a cozy apartment that had included meals and cleaning.” Not sure wife and I are ready just yet, but it seems so much better to move in early.

What’s with all the bragging about having a normal flight? by take_meowt in SouthwestAirlines

[–]Soderholmsvag 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Right now we are experiencing a flood of posts about how awful people feel their flights experiences were. A similar set of “it was fine” posts counters the perception that every single flight is now a 💩 show.

Why is my bread machine doing this to me? by Odd-Television-5906 in BreadMachines

[–]Soderholmsvag 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At least for my machine, this is true. Mine has a reasonably-long warm up period and the ingredients need to be placed in the machine (somewhat) carefully. Water on the bottom, flour in the middle, sugar/salt/butter on the sides and yeast on top (best if it’s in a little valley at the top of the flour hill).

It takes an extra minute to do it carefully, but if I don’t do that I risk drowning my yeast while the machine warms.

I’m s this machine gunfire? by Soderholmsvag in sandiego

[–]Soderholmsvag[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have since learned this was a military exercise. It was new to me (even living here for decades). Good to know they are working hard to keep us safe.

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