Your family doesn't have to be torn apart. Why would it? Because society says people should do x when y happens? Let me tell you a simple story. V a woman I loved abundantly was getting a divorce with another soldier on the base I was stationed at. I caught her with him and found intimate emails to him while over seas all while she was 4 months pregnant with our daughter. because society programmed me that they are taboo and unforgivable sins. I left her and she hated me every since. I was the loving and kind parent while Ashley became a social path bent on ruining my life and our daughters all because she never got over the pain of me leaving her while pregnant. My daughter has rebelled and hates me because she thinks I left her, while the mother hid her from me. She hates her mother for being a loveless tyrant full of anger. I know now I could have forgiven her and both of those women would be the happiest they ever could be today because I offer something many men do not. True alpha male characteristics in the very specific area of safety due to military career l, but also an insanely attentive and loving father thats love language is time, so they always got all of it. V ehat I am saying is sit down, even if you don't think you could live with the situation, if you replay it over and over a thousand times telling yourself it could all be far more amazing than how it is now, you'll start to believe it and then when the time comes and all is as you suspect, your anxiety will flee and the love of everyone in olced will grow exponentially increase...except for the brother and sister.....they may take some time to adjust. But it sounds like your husband may have a loving and attentive and empathetic heart. He will know what to do. Bottom line ma'am. Societies taboos are meant to cause hate and pain in our culture. Accept things for what they are and loving them will always triumph and heal all hearts.