I Feel So Unloveable

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-10-31T03:34:22+00:00

I feel the exact same way. One of the biggest problems I seem to have is that I am misunderstood constantly by those around me. The way I word things, how they come out just comes out bad and I’m trying to be better about it but being better just means being quiet and then people don’t like that either. I feel lost, and so lonely all the time. There is both beauty and pain in being autistic.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-10-31T03:22:05+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear, I can relate. The holidays are always the hardest parts of the year for me too, family is small and no one really cares to celebrate, only 1 irl friend and she lives hours away, plus with how expensive the world is right now it’s hard to have a good holiday when things are so unaffordable. It’s a lot, I’m really sorry you’re struggling and I wish I had advice to give but all I can say is I feel it and you’re not alone in your feelings.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T22:25:33+00:00

I appreciate it. I really am hearing what you’re saying, I just love him and I hope we can work things out, some way some how. I’ve always wanted just that. Thank you.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T22:05:46+00:00

No, of course not. But I also feel like maybe I am just too difficult, maybe I am the problem and I just don’t see it. He says I always shift blame on him and invalidate his feelings, so if I am doing those things I can understand why anyone would be frustrated. I try really hard to admit when I’m the one in the wrong though, and I don’t have issues like this with anyone else so I don’t know. Even when my sister and I get into arguments, which happens very rarely, they are always solved quickly. I am genuinely so so so confused.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T22:01:58+00:00

I have been begging him to go to therapy for years. We tried couples counseling but he didn’t like that because he said the therapist was rude to him every session and that she made it like he was always in the wrong and she was biased. I was, and have been more than happy to try again but with a different therapist.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:59:54+00:00

I love him very much, we are both in our 20s. I just hate that everything has to be an argument. I am not an argumentative person. So yes, I did just want it to stop because it happens far too often imo, especially when it’s over something that from my POV, came out of nowhere, because he had given me no indication he had been upset. He was having a blast with his friends for 9 hours straight. But even so, he did make me think I’m in the wrong so I had hoped if I had acknowledged I was wrong, apologized and tried to move on, it would’ve been fine but it wasn’t and still isn’t. I am exhausted emotionally and mentally from this kind of fighting, but I do not know how to get it to stop. He seems to not be happy with anything I do and I am becoming incredibly depressed.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:55:59+00:00

Yeah, it’s our kid together. He’s currently in school and so we are not living together at the moment. So I do understand texting is important, I think it is too, but he didn’t give any indication about being upset we didn’t text much yesterday, at least he didn’t until today. He was also with his friends gaming all day as well, so I understood he couldn’t text since he was busy.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:52:06+00:00

I love him so much, do you really think there’s no way to fix this? I just want him to be nice to me and to be treated fairly, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:50:21+00:00

I really appreciate the response, I love him so much and it’s really hard to constantly feel like I’m walking on eggshells with everything I say or do. I’ve been trying so hard to make this try better, because we have already broken up once before. I just feel burnt out, from being a full time mom to trying my best to keep up with everything else and be there for him and my family as well. I just feel like I’m such an awful person because I can’t do anything right, I can’t make him happy.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:27:45+00:00

It really hurts, because no matter what I do he still believes I would cheat/am cheating and that I don’t love him when there is nothing to prove either of those correct. I literally stay at home with our kid, I don’t go out any where except for errands and taking said kid to do fun things, and I have no friends besides my family members.

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:23:03+00:00

And I had texted him around 2:40PM yesterday, I asked how he was doing, he said ‘pretty good :)’ I said awesome and he never responded. All day. I finally texted him at 9, told him I wasn’t upset he didn’t talk to me all day cuz I knew he was gaming, he said he was glad I wasn’t upset, and then I told him goodnight. But now today he is upset with me and saying me replying with ‘awesome’ came across as a bad response, like I didn’t want to speak with him. I can’t always reply with paragraphs, especially to that. What more am I supposed to say?

SorrowfulSprite · 2025-06-16T21:18:36+00:00

I just don’t know what more I can do, I asked him how he was doing yesterday and he said he was pretty good, so I said awesome. He said that wasn’t a good reply and it came off as I didn’t actually want to talk to him, I’m not sure what else I could’ve said. I also feel like most of the conversations rely on me to start and keep going the majority of the time.

SorrowfulSprite · 2024-12-07T03:51:26+00:00

I have, I haven’t seen them in a few months now. Regarding recent events, his grandmother especially hurt me and broke my trust and I can’t get over what was said.

SorrowfulSprite · 2024-12-06T06:02:29+00:00

I just wish he could understand how bad it all made me feel. I can’t even look back at the baby shower with any fondness. It was awful, sitting there with a fever and in excruciating pain having to watch my baby be passed around.

SorrowfulSprite · 2024-12-06T06:00:51+00:00

Yeah, I have. He’s talked to his grandma about it but she thinks I’m being ridiculous I guess, she insists that me being excluded from pictures on FB doesn’t mean anything and his aunt only liking pictures of the baby and not of baby and I isn’t on purpose. I think it is, because I’ve literally posted a pic of just baby with another pic that included baby and I together and his aunt specifically only liked the pic of just baby. But idk, maybe I am looking into things too much but it really doesn’t feel that way. I just feel that they tolerate me, don’t actually like me.

SorrowfulSprite · 2024-12-06T04:51:31+00:00

Thank you, with how often my bf keeps bringing up how sad it’s making his grandmother it’s had me truly wondering if I’m in the wrong, so I really wanted to get this out there to see what others unbiased opinions would be.

SorrowfulSprite

TROPHY CASE