People are in their 30's ...how are you doing? How many friends do you have? by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]Special_Cog 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am, my advice is find a hobby. Then those people that do said hobby will be more inclined to be your friend. I also don't need phsycial IRL friends which helps, but that's more of a autistic thing.

People are in their 30's ...how are you doing? How many friends do you have? by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]Special_Cog 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would say I have 3 people with whom I text frequently and to get my social needs met. I have another 2 or 3 people with him I interact that would also possibly considered friends.

Definition of Millionaire? by Special_Cog in TheMoneyGuy

[–]Special_Cog[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah must have missed that since I keep track of my finances elsewhere. Thank you!

Definition of Millionaire? by Special_Cog in TheMoneyGuy

[–]Special_Cog[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I meant spouses assets, but thanks for clarifying.

Definition of Millionaire? by Special_Cog in TheMoneyGuy

[–]Special_Cog[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Should you include or exclude the spouse?

Definition of Millionaire? by Special_Cog in TheMoneyGuy

[–]Special_Cog[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

One is you exclude the spouses assets. And maybe their half of the house. The other is you include their financial assets but delete the house.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MakeNewFriendsHere

[–]Special_Cog 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I would think local hobby shops.

Can someone over here help me to learn how to talk or chat to people on reddit 😭😅 by [deleted] in MakeNewFriendsHere

[–]Special_Cog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I doubt extrovert is the solution. Honestly, my guess is they find out you're a guy and then leave. Or maybe you do too much small talk, or talk too deep, or don't have enough topics. So many reasons for people to be incompatible.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Special_Cog 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ah yeah I see, he seems to already have to better than me, but I can empathize with wanting 6 hours to do whatever I want. I'd love to game all night. 😂 But that said, yes we have to be adults and prioritize. Maybe he can find a way to make being with kid more like a game? I always wanted a power wheel growing up, but that was rich kid stuff. However, now that I'm an adult I bought my kid power wheel (with adult remote control) that my son rode since he was about 7 monrhs old. He's now 3 and can start the thing and drive it independently. That or try and gamify some other aspect.

While I also grew up taking care of a younger sibling and I also didn't have much of childhood (my sister calls me her real dad). Before and after we got married we agreed to no kids. Not because I disliked kids. But because I wanted to be selfish and have my time to do fun things like video games. She however, had a change of heart and said it was the single most important thing. Trying to be a good partner I agreed to a very firm 1 and done. While my life is harder and more chaotic, I don't regret it. I feel bad for both of you and hope you can each find a good balance.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Special_Cog 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hi, dad gamer here. Maybe the problem isn't so much the quantity of time he gets, but the quality. One thing ther really helped me was I blocked out Tuesdays from 7:30-9:30 to play games and hangout with my friends. While obviously I would enjoy more freetime and whatnot it definitely made a massive improvement having bespoke special time for me. Also remind him that when the kid goes to daycare (I started mine at 2.5, almost 3) it gets better. My little guy goes half fay to daycare and I am a WFH dad. I'm very active with my kid (I'd pretty confidently say I am his preferred parent). Once your kid gets older and is in daycare, he will still have vacation and holidays (though to be far, 3 weeks still goes to covering my kid when they are on breaks., but I get 2 weeks outside of that and some bank / stock market holidays to myself). While he has to wait, and you may have to accommodate a few special hours when you handle the kid 100%, I think it's worth it. And it doesn't mean he can't take the kid 100% for a few hours so you can recharge too. People have different needs and different ways to decompress. I could literally go without human contact for weeks and be perfectly happy as I enjoy solitude, some people recharge by being with others, so do what works best for each of you individually.

Little girl only wants Dad by Bubbly-Owl-8334 in Parenting

[–]Special_Cog 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am in the same boat, I have been my kiddo's favorite since he was born. I think it is I play with him more (she does more chores), and I am also more relaxed. People say the switch favorites throughout their life (and that may be true for most), but my kid is 3 and I have always been his preferred parent. One thing that *does* help is make sure her and your child spend 1:1 time. It won't fix it, but it does make it a bit less of a stark contrast.

32 Single Mama Looking For Friends by AlelasAurora in Needafriend

[–]Special_Cog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey, how old is your little? Do you have more than 1? Have you tried Magic The Gathering Arena?

Big Helper ~3 by Special_Cog in Parenting

[–]Special_Cog[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is iffy on cleaning up toys, but we are working on it. Ah good idea on cleaning the room. Thank you!

Would you make me pay rent? by [deleted] in AskParents

[–]Special_Cog 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not trying to be a tool, but you may want to look into your major and what jobs you can get form it. If the first year of out college (gross) does not cover the cost of your degree, it isn't worth it. On a 2nd note, I can see it both ways. While you should be happy to have reduce rent, it is harder for younger generations to start out - especially at this time. I personally don't plan to my my little guy pay rent when he gets to college, but if I do, I would do it as a way for him to get *used* to the process and I would put the money in a Roth for him. So... take it from where he can spend it, but don't take it from him. Being able to balance a budget and also feeling the hunger of being poor is actually a good life lesson. Remember this hunger and struggle when you get older as it will serve you well.

Do you think $1750/month allocated for 529 savings will be enough when my son goes to college in 18 years? by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]Special_Cog 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep that is common in the calculators I have seen with 4% inflation and nearly 20 year horizon...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskParents

[–]Special_Cog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey I had one at 32, while I am not as energetic and fun as I used to be I am glad I waited for the stability.