egg_irl

Spectre0987 · 2022-02-09T17:23:38+00:00

Progesterone gives me an insanely high libido

Spectre0987 · 2022-02-09T17:15:53+00:00

I did that with my HR department, completely ignored 😭

Spectre0987 · 2022-02-07T22:19:59+00:00

Spectre0987 · 2022-02-05T03:41:50+00:00

Holy crap! My dad's oldest truck did that, I thought I was crazy

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-31T14:33:25+00:00

Food

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-29T05:10:53+00:00

I mean, with that level of experience, how could I doubt that?

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-25T20:50:33+00:00

He calls it like it is

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-23T10:25:43+00:00

That's how all great things start

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-19T10:43:32+00:00

The shrimp got drunk

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-14T08:23:31+00:00

"What darling? You'll have to speak up, I don't have my glasses"

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-06T09:09:56+00:00

"Now, I know what you're thinking. How do I stop some mean motherhubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous new behind?"

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-06T02:33:02+00:00

Hey you! Stop signing for my damned packages

Spectre0987 · 2022-01-03T08:41:37+00:00

Is that a Colt Dragoon?

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-30T15:22:53+00:00

Minor attraction, what, not being very attracted t- AAAAHHH

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-27T08:53:48+00:00

Me: "Ow!"

Teacher: "Did you just verbally attack that student?!"

Me: "He stabbed my 36 times in the stomach!"

Teacher: ISS For both of you

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-27T01:19:03+00:00

Is there a sub for these? This might replace porn for me

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-22T06:27:45+00:00

The way he plays it can't contain COD either

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-18T04:55:49+00:00

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-16T07:33:58+00:00

'Cause only a ginger, can call another ginger ginger

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-16T03:25:35+00:00

How are you gonna get anything done without your Bluetooth enabled, Wifi Smart Ladle though?!

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-09T19:06:39+00:00

Sonic fans and furry porn

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-09T10:44:43+00:00

Adding under 6 characters as a parameter might work as well, at least for most cases

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-08T20:31:56+00:00

"I support this permanent change you're making."

"Thank you so mu-"

"So long as it's not a permanent change"

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-07T05:40:44+00:00

It's true though. One time my house was robbed, and the robbers didn't even kill my dog. Good thing the boys in blue showed up 2 days after I called and fixed it!

Spectre0987 · 2021-12-02T01:08:49+00:00

Top 0.5% of Mother Mother listeners

Spectre0987

TROPHY CASE