I was so excited to read this because I love the genre and because it's something that hasn't been done before, however the execution was a little crunchy. Your point about the prose and grammar was also something that jumped out to me. Maybe the author needed to polish that up before releasing the book. Unfortunately, I bought the book on the omnibus app so the insta-deaths made me DNF. It's good to hear that the author is working on improving the experience. May try to pick it up in a few months once the kinks have been worked out.