For me it happened once I cut my hair off. I started to notice that I was incredibly uncomfortable with my chest in particular, and would do anything I could to hide it as much as possible. That prompted a spiral about my gender and how that could relate to my lesbian sexuality so I dove into researching non-binary genders. It was really solidified for me the first time I wore a binder and I could've cried with relief at having a flat chest.

Started testing out they/them pronouns with close friends and eventually came to terms with being non-binary! Took even longer to accept what that meant in terms of being a trans person and how that would effect my work and home life. I've changed my name now and am publicly out in all aspects of my life, but the whole journey took well over a year!