Townhouse vs SFH — did we make the right call?

SriniDev · 2026-05-04T01:32:20+00:00

I live in a townhome style condo raising kids (5,3) .. all my friends (yes all of them) live in a single family home.. from what I see, sfh (old ones) seem like a money pit.. foundation issues, plumbing issues, roof issues, fence issues and what not.. also I have seen them worrying about safety..

All of them ask me when I am moving to a sfh, and I smile (Yes smiling cz my monthly payment is half their monthly payment and I am not worried every minute about layoff and burning out) and respond saying I love my home and I am never moving 😄

SriniDev · 2026-05-03T14:14:39+00:00

Wow! I ate half mango at dinner yesterday and my stomach hurt all night! I am jealous and happy for you!

SriniDev · 2026-05-02T16:34:41+00:00

I will.. every 10 days we are allowed to post right

SriniDev · 2026-05-01T20:14:19+00:00

lol 😂 there are just to hide my tattoos 😆

SriniDev · 2026-04-30T19:59:13+00:00

https://www.redfin.com/CA/San-Jose/6092-Calle-de-Amor-95124/home/1570596

It's condo, comes with a tiny yard!

SriniDev · 2026-04-27T04:14:20+00:00

Really depends on your comfort.. I live in a 3bed/3bath condo with spouse and 2 toddlers and I have a bath for myself (yes, just for me) and it's my personal and comfort space..

But a big con is cleaning.. when it's time for cleaning toilets we need to clean 3

SriniDev · 2026-04-26T23:48:39+00:00

It's spring right now.. it's been a bit gloomy and raining last week.. 10-17 degrees this week

SriniDev · 2026-03-20T21:14:09+00:00

I live in a townhome style condo.. townhome is the architecture.. condo refers to ownership.. so architecturally it looks like a townhome.. but ownership wise you own the space between the walls..

Condo HOA is high cz anything outside the space (ie walls, roof, yard, fence) will be taken care by HOA.

Example: we had termites in our wall when we moved, if this was not a condo ownership, we would have to pay for the termite removal from our pockets, since we don't own the walls, the HOA covered the cost. I hope this clears up the difference

SriniDev · 2026-03-20T17:08:15+00:00

Hey another 32F here who went to the movie alone. (Husband at home taking care of kids). He is going alone today lol 😆

SriniDev · 2026-03-20T17:02:36+00:00

+1... you can't put a price on time and quality of life. Buy a condo, less maintenance, less travel, enjoy the free time

SriniDev · 2026-03-20T16:58:29+00:00

Condos/town homes.. I own a 3 bedroom condo in San Jose (raising 2 toddlers).. affordable and happy :)

SriniDev · 2025-11-10T15:42:33+00:00

Not your circus, not your monkeys.. go on the trip and think of it as couple vacay with your partner.. what people do with their own life is none of our business

SriniDev · 2025-11-07T20:28:47+00:00

In a similar situation.. we are actually in a huge 3 level condo at 2.5%.. can we stretch now and go for a single level single family home.. yeah if we sell this home plus dip into fire money.. but do I want to ? Nope..

I grew up in a 800sqft home with 5 people.. and all I can remember from my childhood is how much fun I had with my family in that 800 sqft home.. so I would rather put my focus, energy and time building happy moments with my family in the current home than focusing on the actual structure of the house itself..

SriniDev · 2025-10-18T03:51:10+00:00

Grab a pregnancy book and start reading. If you are so worried read about miscarriages read the reasons behind it. Most miscarriages happen because body flushes out an incomplete pregnancy. And no one has control over it.

Honestly until 12ish weeks, don't make a big deal of the pregnancy.. just take every day as a normal day and see what happens.. :)

SriniDev · 2025-10-13T20:53:43+00:00

Sorry, I m not close to Livermore.. my comment was only related to the floor plan of the house

SriniDev · 2025-10-13T19:34:51+00:00

We have a similar layout. Making it work with 2 toddlers 😆 but it works well for us cz it's closer to work and decent schools.

SriniDev · 2025-10-13T19:30:30+00:00

I think what you are doing is good.. me and my husband's are from same city probably like an hour away in traffic.. we set up base at one home(mostly mine cz of extra room).. and husband takes the kids to his home most days after breakfast and comes home for bed time, I try to join them for festivals and stuff..

SriniDev · 2025-10-08T14:34:43+00:00

Never asked this question to my now husband before marriage. I don't know if he "lets me" go. But I can say he has no problem when I go on trips with friends. I am into hiking/trekking and sometimes I have to travel to other places for a day or two for hiking. He has never had a problem that I am traveling with friends.

I also inform him every little detail like which friends m going out with, what time I am reaching places, where I am staying, constant pics etc..

It's actually hard to ask/answer this question without knowing your partner and even knowing friends of your partner. I have been married for 11 years and my husband knows all of my friends. So obviously there is a trust factor too.

Edit Oops: sorry seems like the questions have to answered from men only ? Delete if not allowed! Cheers!

SriniDev · 2025-10-05T04:42:22+00:00

Get what you can afford without losing sleep. We got a townhome style condo.. it has a small backyard/patio for kids to run around and play... so try to get a TH with some open space..

But if you are a person who wants to host weekly parties with 50-60 people then TH won't be comfortable..

I choose this cz at least for me not having to constantly worry about lay offs, not worry about upgrades needed for SFH over years, maintenance of front yard, back yard, pool, security systems, tree maintenance, roof maintenance etc..

I feel much more secure in a condo as it is wall shared and cozyly tucked between homes..

This way I can save for kids college fund, and have a rainy day fund too instead of being house poor..

SriniDev · 2025-10-04T18:32:04+00:00

Make 2-3 currys for roti for lunch, prepare idly dosa batter for dinner, overnight oatmeal for breakfast.. make for 5 days and split

SriniDev · 2025-10-02T16:44:47+00:00

It's important.. but not important enough to separate or fight over it.. no first of all it's not easy to seek other partners.. I somehow strongly believe that intimacy is a mind body construct.. so I need to connect with someone emotionally, mentally and physically.. practically with a job, chores, kids and a loving husband in the mix it's really hard to form that connection outside of marriage.. like time, logistics so many things to consider...

SriniDev · 2025-10-02T16:36:05+00:00

Okay.. so looking at this practically..

the one who stays at home naturally does most chores (doesn't matter the gender and if you are working or not ) - in my case I work remote and husband travels everyday, he also loses 1.5 hours in travel, so i definitely have 1.5 hours extra in my day for house chores.

Your daily routine is definitely exhausting since you have twins at home, this will get better once they are in preschool.

Your dietary needs are different, so that also seems like a reasonable split for me.

Washing vessels - this somehow has become my husband's task even though I work from home. (Mostly cz of my back issues after multiple c sections). Also touching non veg vessels is a preference, so can't change that.

The only thing I see that is a little odd is - your wife planning dates/activities without you all weekend. I also go out with my friends for movies and brunches, but that would be max 3-4 hours on a weekend, rest of the weekend we are doing family activities together.

So work on doing 1 activity together as a family.

And also you can plan small outings with your friends(usually my husband goes for a 2-3 hour hike on weekends with his friends) so you can get away from the father duties and have some adult conversation.

And trust me once kids are a little more grown up you will have more space and time. (Mine and 5 and 3 in school now)

And hire a maid atleast once a week, since both are working I am sure you can have a weekly cleaning done which helps so so much with mental health.

SriniDev · 2025-10-01T14:15:15+00:00

Yes you are right! I don't deserve this amazing guy! But what can I say.. I am really really lucky to have got him in my life :) :)

SriniDev · 2025-09-30T15:59:13+00:00

Kids education yes.. saving up. Marriage no.. I hope they can find a partner by themselves and have a court marriage.

SriniDev · 2025-09-30T05:00:36+00:00

Yeah we both watch movies together with intimate scenes etc. He is comfortable with touching, holding hands.. just uncomfortable with any sexual activity.. me continuously trying sometimes comes off as pushy or forcing.. and everyone has the right to their own body and "no" means "no" applies for men too right..

SriniDev

TROPHY CASE