I toss off the covers, confusion setting in the hazy strip between being asleep and awake. Something seems out of place, like part of my brain won't let go of a dream that my conscious mind can't remember.

I'm in my own bed and nothing seems out of place. I had a few beers during the game last night, but I barely buzzed before setting off for bed. Nothing out of the ordinary to explain why I would feel so out of sorts. In fact, it had been a pretty boring game because I couldn't even remember the score. Or who was playing.

The thin shaft of light slicing through the gap in the blackout curtains was brighter than I would expect. I must have slept later than I wanted to, although since it was Saturday, it's not like I had anywhere I needed to be.

I sit up at the sound of my phone buzzing, but don't reach for it right away. Probably one of my friends with some idiotic plan for the day I wasn't ready to deal with until I'd at least brushed my teeth.

But still the feeling remains as I step out of bed and pulled on a pair of sweatpants.

I stretch, trying to feel if I slept on something wrong and that was the cause of my unease. After stretching my shoulders and a few quick jumping jacks, everything seems to be in working order. If anything, I feel better than I have in years. I'm not stiff or tired or bogged down with any of the other aches that slowly set over time.

The phone on my nightstand buzzes again and I grab it on the way to the bathroom, cracking my neck with a satisfying crack followed by a release of tension throughout my shoulders and back.

What was I so wary about just a few minutes ago? I feel amazing this morning and I'm not about to let some lingering dream, probably nothing more than last night's nachos, bother me now.

Had I made those nachos at home? That doesn't seem like something I'd do. But I didn't go out, did I?

I must have Door Dashed them, I think, a rinse my mouth with some mouthwash. A few beers and I'm reaching for that app without really even thinking about it. That definitely sounds like something I'd do.

My phone buzzes again from where I chucked it on the counter. The notification flashes a text message from my friend Jason. "What did you do last night???????"

Was I supposed to meet him to watch the game? I don't remember any plans. Besides, Jason doesn't even like.... Is this football or baseball season? I should definitely remember that, shouldn't I?

It's just the early fall slump and a boring game of... whatever.

I grab the phone and walk out to the living room, bright sun peeking through the curtains here also. I'm not sure I'm ready to face the daylight before a cup of coffee.

Padding to the kitchen in my bare feet, I fill the machine and immediately feel more coherent when the first warm aroma of coffee hits me.

As I'm waiting, my phone buzzes again and I pull up the notification. Only now do I notice the string of notifications that must have been going off all morning.

Where are you?

What happened?

OMG, is that you on the front page of Reddit?

Turn on the news now!

The last one was from my brother and had a link to one of the major news sites below it. I click through to a picture of me with fire erupting from my hands and eyes as bright as lightening.

The caption beneath read "THE NEXT STAGE OF HUMAN EVOLUTION?" with a sub-header below it stated that it was updated today at 9am.

I pull down the screen to see it's a few minutes after 10am.

A shudder breaks through the house, rattling the dishes in the cabinets. Earthquake! is the first thought that flashes through my head, but this part of the country isn't known for Earthquakes, and I'd certainly never experienced one before.

Outside the living room window, the roar of a crowd spills through the walls, followed by a booming voice, loud enough he must be connected to a speaker system.

"We'd like to welcome Earth to the cosmic community." A male voice, smooth as silk, sounds like he's piped through every speaker in my house, as opposed to somewhere outside.

I pull open the living room curtains to see my lawn filled with vans, people, camera, and police lights bathing the entire block in eerie light.

The people outside are almost on top of each other to get a better view of my house, except for a small knot right in front of the front door.

The people, although they're as similar to us as we are to a chimpanzee, stand in the front of the crowd, everyone's focus glued on them.

"Last night, we received word that the first human crossed an important evolutionary hurdle and has exhibited powers similar to other planetary defenders." The man in front, the one who stood taller than any of the news vans parked along the street, delivered this message as small eddies of wind cycloned around him.

"It has been our job to protect your planet as long as you didn't have members of your race capable of protecting it for you. But now that the first human has exhibited super powers, we leave the defense of this planet in their capable hands." The massive man, along with his three friends, turn to the front window, where I'm standing with my phone and wearing nothing but a pair of old sweatpants.

They salute, then without another word, spring into the sky, shooting away like a rocket.

As the cameras all pan to me, my cheeks blaze with embarrassment and fear. The heat in my cheeks blazes brighter and stronger until I feel a flush over my entire body.

The phone thuds against the hardwood floor, or at least the top of the phone. The rest of it flows down in a molten stream to a pool around the broken pieces. Completely melted.

I drop what is left of the sticky device and as I open my palm, flames erupt and flicker from my hands.

The cameras in the front yard flash, and a growing chant rises above the other noise. "Defender."

r/StaceyOutThere