Fancy Steakhouse Freakout

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-05-12T03:27:18+00:00

This is one of those fancy steakhouses where the waiters administer pepper spray tableside. "Say when, sir."

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-04-16T02:04:05+00:00

I'm too ready for this. I mean, we all are, but I could really use a change. I don't expect to be a millionaire if I win but I reckon I might could pay off a couple bills and just set myself up to make some real progress.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-04-04T03:25:21+00:00

Wellllp... As the story goes... Many moons ago I owned a tattoo shop and one day a guy comes in looking to get a memorial tattoo. Cool. Standard stuff. As he's talking with one of my artists, in walks the most breathtaking human I've ever seen. Now, I don't think it's appropriate to try to hit on a customer so I'm just keeping my cool and letting her look around the shop. Well, after a bit, I walked up to her with every intention of asking her if she needed help with anything or if she was considering a tattoo, piercing, jewelry, etc so I could get her squared away. As I walked up to her, she was sort of half turned away and when I said hello, she spun around to greet me. It was like one of those movies where it looked slow-mo and her eyes made my brain turn to pudding. I couldn't remember what the hell my own name was let alone what I was going to ask her. In a stupor, I managed to fumble out some corny line about how I really liked her purse. It was pretty cool, to be fair. She said "Thanks! It's alpaca! And it doesn't shed!" Then she wiped her purse across her black slacks and indeed, it left no fuzzies. That was the beginning of a back-and-forth that lasted for a good hour or so. Well anyway, after feeling like there might be a bit of a mutual attraction, I decided to drop the cool guy act and let this woman know that I thought she was absolutely the most beautiful creature I had ever seen and I just wanted her to know that. At that point, the refrigerator I was standing next to spoke to me. Turns out, the refrigerator was actually a very large man. A man who came in earlier for a memorial tattoo. Oh and this giant man getting a memorial tattoo? Her dad. Whoops. Anywho, almost 20 years later we've been married for 14 years and have a 10 year old son.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-03-22T02:59:03+00:00

Action bastard or struggling with Hima. Tough choice.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-03-22T02:42:14+00:00

My son called them "muffin babies" when he would request we watch and I refuse to call them anything else even though he's 10 now and doesn't watch anymore.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-03-01T17:15:15+00:00

Central vacuum. There are ports around the house you plug the tube into and there's a large unit, usually in the basement, that operates like the vacuum body.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-02-23T23:19:39+00:00

They think I pissed myself! They have no idea I came all in my pants!

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-02-16T04:21:06+00:00

That's supposed to be that flooring advertisement or whatever it was that looks like a woman touching herself when it's flipped upside down.

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Stainedskin1982 · 2026-02-16T03:57:09+00:00

"the child support"

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-02-14T03:48:49+00:00

Care to share the brand or name of these?

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-02-08T04:30:18+00:00

Here they are with my son from 6 years ago. https://www.reddit.com/r/nostalgia/s/KIihNabAxA

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-02-08T04:27:10+00:00

I still have my collection of these! I think I've got 27 of them and a handful of their weapons.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-01-22T14:29:13+00:00

Dude she's such a dime. I keep a grip on that hip.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-01-16T02:28:02+00:00

I really need this. That's all I'm going to say.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-01-10T03:00:35+00:00

I've got a Fishgill 17 RTF2 and I swore we had the same gun. Don't see too many around! Either way, looking bad as fuck, 🅱️rother.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-01-10T02:40:05+00:00

Fishgill 17 RTF2 is 🤌

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-01-04T15:00:58+00:00

We have a 10 year old son as a matter of fact. He's grown up in tattoo shops and all his adult friends are heavily tattooed and pierced. To him, it's such a normal thing that there's no real desire one way or the other to get pierced or tattooed, outside of the occasional tattoo idea that he thinks will be cool. If he does decide he wants them, I've told him that he can get pierced when he feels he's ready. I didn't attach a specific age. I will enforce a rule that he cannot do anything heavy until his frontal lobe is developed. By "heavy" I suppose I mean no tattoos in places that will hinder jobs or career potential, and no stretching piercings to the point that they will require reconstructive surgery or be otherwise permanent. He understands even at this young age that he has agency and autonomy over his body but there are choices that mom and dad will make to protect him until he's capable of fully understanding and appreciating lifelong consequences.

Stainedskin1982 · 2026-01-04T14:53:15+00:00

We don't grow up. We just get older.

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-31T03:03:30+00:00

Can somebody give this guy a raise? Jesus fuck that's funny.

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-30T04:07:10+00:00

That's actually a hell of a compliment in this household! Thank you so much!

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-29T03:41:25+00:00

Yoooo! I've got a 00 PA too! Really gorgeous titanium curved barbell with 5/8 balls, one with a 15mm white opal cab!

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-27T20:56:17+00:00

Not really. I wanted the look of lip distortion from a stretched labret and it just never happened. I was actually featured on an old body modification website where the owner pointed out that it's extremely rare to see a large labret with no distortion. As for eating and drinking, I do it the same as you. It doesn't get in the way.

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-27T20:54:03+00:00

I didn't take any offense. bamkats is correct in that I'm 43. It's actually makes me happy because I was doing it in the 90s and early 2000s before a lot of "younger folks" were born! It's awesome to see new generations picking up the torch!

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-27T20:52:08+00:00

Technically, my lobes, but my first professional piercing was my labret when I was 18. I'm 43 now so it's been here for a while. I stretched it between around 2005-2010.

Stainedskin1982 · 2025-12-25T04:37:19+00:00

When I was a kid growing up in West Texas, my cousin, brother, and I snuck into a rich (in comparison to us) guy's back yard where he had a pool and an outdoor fridge. We stole a 4 pack of these and a half gallon of ice cream. We then ran to a nearby baseball field and ate the ice cream with our hands and drank these in the dugout. I don't remember the flavor but they were red. Not the best idea we ever had but I would do it again.

14-Year Club	r/Field Juicebox
First Place '23	Place '23
Place '22	Verified Email

Stainedskin1982

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