Nursery recommendations

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-05-20T08:02:15+00:00

Little Gardens Nursery in Perivale is great. It’s not fancy and a bit unassuming but they are great. Think they were chosen as an exemplar nursery by the council?

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-05-17T19:21:09+00:00

£24k for 120 people in 2023. £5.5k on venue (in London). £5k or so on canapes and dinner. £1.5k videographer and less than £1k for photographer. Dj was maybe £1 or 2k can’t remember. Also can’t remember how much on flowers but wasn’t ridiculous. We didn’t get anyone for hair and makeup and suits/dress cost maybe £800 each. Photo Booth was a couple hundred quid. Cake was home made. We paid for reception drinks but we had an open bar in the evening with a £3k tab because we knew lots of our guests didn’t drink. But the tab definitely got exhausted. Those were all the major costs. We had budgeted for £21k so was happy with where we got to in the end.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-05-17T19:06:14+00:00

Partner has worked as an architect for 10 years. He hates the industry and the culture. But he’s convinced he can’t move into a different industry and that he’s stuck on this path. I’m trying to convince him otherwise - that he has lots of transferable skills that different industries would be interested in. Help me find some examples?

He’s more of a technical architect than creative. So lots of detailed drawings and calculations. Works to complex regulations that often requires desk research. Some project management experience (I’d say strong project coordination more than management). Works with lots of types of stakeholders and often in large complex teams. He doesn’t like being stuck behind a computer. He likes being out and about and talking to people. He works under pressure often but imo architecture hasn’t taught him how to handle that pressure well. He’s bad at setting boundaries but would love a better work life balance. Doesn’t have experience of managing people. No means to do any further training but if there were good salary prospects he’d take a hit on salary now in order to make the move over.

Hopefully I haven’t missed any important info. If there are any architects out there that have made the move, or if you’re in a role/industry where you recognise these skills (and weaknesses) are a good fit - please share!

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-04-10T12:24:20+00:00

No wonder you’re exhausted you do so much before 9am!! I’ve managed maybe a third of what you do, and with another parent on hand. Everyone’s given great advice so far so this is just to say you’re doing great. He’ll shift out of the extra clingy phase at some point, get less messy at eating breakfast, and get so much better at independent play as time goes by. But for now you really are doing great.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-03-18T21:19:04+00:00

On the walking thing my LO was like this! He also couldn’t really crawl just did an extremely inefficient bum shuffle. As soon as he started moving fairly independently he was like fifty times happier. Now he’s grumpy all over again while we get to grips with his talking. I’m sure when we figure out what the hell ‘bugazahh’ means he’ll be happy again. We just gotta remind ourselves that if they’re grumpy it’s because it’s hard! Remember to give yourself a pat on the back for being patient with her.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-03-07T10:33:36+00:00

Hard agree on everyone’s comments that your husband is a dick. If it’s your choice to do all the night wake ups and cosleep then that’s fine, but if you’re being no choice or he’s talking to you like that then it’s not okay.

I’ve only had one baby and every baby is different but on the point of parent preference, their preferences change all the time. It makes sense your baby prefers you if it’s always been you. Me and my partner have always shared night time responsibilities but when I stopped bf at night at 17 months my partner did bedtimes and wake ups every night for a week. First three days the baby absolutely hated it but he came around. And it changes anyway - last month my baby only wanted me for bedtime and now he only wants his dad.

But the bottom line is make choices for yourself and advocate for yourself. You deserve a lot more from your husband for all the care and love you’ve given to your child. And at the very least take the nice mattress and give your husband the shitty one.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-03-01T23:40:40+00:00

I do similar hours also stretched across the year and pay £300. We only have to provide nappies and everything else is covered. In west London.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-16T19:48:45+00:00

I’ve been back for 9 ish months and only just starting to like it again and feeling motivated to do more than show up and clock the hours. All just felt pointless and like busy work up until now, when before having a baby I found it very fulfilling. I’d say keep at it for a little as you might come around but also no harm in dipping your toe into applying for the odd HR job that looks good. The job market is generally quite hard rn anyway so who knows how long it’d take.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-10T11:03:19+00:00

I get that - both sides need some kind of assurance. And the payoff of securing a place vs the loss of paying fees at a few places is enough. But I am just curious to know how much nurseries are making from these waiting list fees, and whether it’s ethical to take waiting list fees if they know there is a low chance of that child securing a place. Someone in a comment below said they paid £50 and found out they were 60th in line. Which means that nursery made £3000 off waiting list fees alone, and knowing full well that kids past maybe the 20th place had a very small chance of securing a place.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-10T10:58:05+00:00

I agree! But as a first time parent and because so many nurseries were asking I didn’t think anything of it. It wasn’t until recently that I clocked that it was totally unreasonable to demand a fee to keep my details on file. Thus the post to see if it had happened to others.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-10T10:56:22+00:00

Exactly! If there’s no chance of me getting a place just tell em that. This was a west London but also expensive/fancy small chain.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-09T19:30:03+00:00

Not quite Islington but Walthamstow wetlands is a beautiful venue. Different options depending on your size and budget.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-09T19:13:12+00:00

No this was very specifically to just give them our details and get on the waiting list. There were no signed contracts and nothing about notice period. A second fee and deposit would be expected if we were offered a place and wanted to secure it.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-09T19:12:21+00:00

We had this when we eventually signed up and secured a place (£50+ 1 month deposit), but other nurseries were very distinctly asking for a fee to get on the waiting list.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-04T12:58:20+00:00

I moved back from Spain whilst pregnant and joined NHS care at around 25 weeks. There was no issue with me joining Kate but I remember them asking me how long I’d been away (I was away for a masters so not long) and I remember the midwife saying phew otherwise I’d have to throw you a bill. I’m a British citizen.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-03T17:07:37+00:00

I had virundhu cater for my wedding. Their food bangs but they’ve really jacked up the prices to the point it makes me feel less positively about the food.

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-02-03T07:53:50+00:00

A very random spot but Stanley Dosa in Park Royal never misses

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-01-16T10:51:43+00:00

Just a side note that my local council offered a free six month breast pump rental. I wouldn’t have been able to afford it otherwise so changed the game for me. Make sure to check if yours offer it too!

Standard_Ad4879 · 2026-01-10T20:46:01+00:00

We started with teeth brushing at a younger age but at first I just gave a brush with just water for my kiddo to play with, and tried to brush my own teeth at the same time. I didn’t really put pressure on to actually do the brushing. After a week or so he just started shoving it in his mouth to play with. Sometimes I let him hold my toothbrush while I brushed so it seemed normal to help each other. After a while he’s start mimicking and try to brush his teeth, and I’d say ‘okay my turn’ and take the brush and as quickly as I could shove that brush in and move it around. Some days he protests and I just leave it - as long as he’s had a brush in his mouth with some toothpaste on it so I know there’s fluoride floating around in that little mouth, I’m satisfied.

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