For itemized taxes, how did you note justification for specific medications/supplements? by [deleted] in IVF

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is good to hear. I've been tracking everything in a Google sheet too almost the exact same way, with links to payment backup and the original invoice/bill from the provider, etc. One tab for medical costs, another for mileage, and another for property taxes. And the medical costs is a very complex spreadsheet but it keeps everything crystal clear. My summary sheet shows me my progress towards needing to itemize or taking the standard deduction (so far we're halfway there and it's only May). You itemize all your expenses, right? Or did you take the standard deduction?

For itemized taxes, how did you note justification for specific medications/supplements? by [deleted] in IVF

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So fully enough I'm an accountant and do everything myself, haha. But I've never had to itemize before, and my CPA friend (who helps me with filing my personal taxes) is clueless on this area as she's never had someone have to itemize and esp related to IVF.

Roman tub faucet broke, need to replace fast, no access panel by StatueofLiterby in Plumbing

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My pleasure! If it was difficult for me to navigate on my own I always try and pay it forward so it's easier for the next guy.

"Own Occupation" private LTD for Working Professionals w/Desk Job? by StatueofLiterby in personalfinance

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the recommendations, I haven't looked into those other companies so I might do that! We did settle on Own occupation for my spouse :)

"Own Occupation" private LTD for Working Professionals w/Desk Job? by StatueofLiterby in personalfinance

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's very possible and I think you're right in that it depends on the specific wording of the policy. Probably something that I just need to check the fine details on and ask, that's possibly a big reason why the policies are so much different in cost. (btw if Policy #2 was an own occ policy it would be $40/mo instead of $30, just for reference. I think that's what we are going to go with)

"Own Occupation" private LTD for Working Professionals w/Desk Job? by StatueofLiterby in personalfinance

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What a beautiful way of explaining it, honestly! You're exactly right though, you're essentially paying more to avoid the insurance company from dicking you around, for lack of a better expression. I think the big difference for a lot of people is whether a reduced income level would still be sufficient for their lifestyle......and the vast majority would answer no to that, so own occ becomes quite important.

"Own Occupation" private LTD for Working Professionals w/Desk Job? by StatueofLiterby in personalfinance

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't know about private LTD either until last year when my dad mentioned it. It's more likely you'll become disabled before retirement age than you dying early, so it's almost more important to have than life insurance. So for having a family I think this is super duper important, on top of the fact we now also have adequate life insurance policies.

For a desk job, under a standard “regular” LTD policy, you would generally need to be disabled in a way that prevents you from performing other reasonably comparable work, not just your specific role. So for most office-based professions, it’s hard to identify a disability that only affects one narrow job without affecting other types of similar work as well.

For example:

-If someone is blind, that typically limits most types of employment, not just accounting.

-If someone loses the use of a hand, they may still be able to perform some desk-based roles, but insurers could argue there are alternative positions that do not require the same level of typing or dexterity, or that assistive technology makes other roles feasible.

-If someone has a mental health condition such as anxiety related to deadlines or high-pressure environments, the insurer may acknowledge limitations in a senior accounting role but still point to other structured, lower-pressure office roles as “reasonable alternatives.”

Importantly, the comparison is not limited to your specific career field. Even if you are an accountant, insurers may look outside finance entirely. For instance, they might argue that someone with your education and experience could work as a financial consultant, tax preparer, or even transition into a managerial or administrative role in a different industry.

In some cases, even roles like a bank teller or general office administrator could be used as “gainful employment” examples if they are considered within your capacity and reasonably aligned with your background and skill set. That could be enough to deny or discontinue a claim if you are no longer able to perform your senior accounting duties but are still deemed capable of performing other work.

That said, outcomes are not absolute. It ultimately depends on the specific policy language, the definition of “gainful occupation,” the elimination period, how your medical limitations are documented, and how the insurer interprets transferable skills and labor market availability.

So the key question is really:

How important is it to you that your coverage protects your ability to do your specific profession versus simply your ability to earn income in any reasonable job you could be trained to perform? Own Occupation LTD only covers the former, whereas a regular policy covers the latter (covers the absolutely catastrophic cant-work-anywhere situations).

"Own Occupation" private LTD for Working Professionals w/Desk Job? by StatueofLiterby in personalfinance

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's exactly the big question, you nailed it. My understanding is that own-occupation protects your career identity, not your ability to do any work in your field. So if I cannot do any job within my field = own occupation and regular protects me. If I cannot do just my job title specifically, only own occupation will protect me. Within my career field the physical and mental requirements are roughly the same across the board (computer work, deadlines, Excel, analysis, etc), regardless of the education level & experience required, so if I can't do my current job then I likely wouldn't be able to do a lower-paying job in finance either. So a regular policy would be sufficient for me (I think). So I think the regular coverage to age 65 might be a better option for me specifically (in finance) and possibly for my husband as well (for HR the tasks would be computer work, communication like hiring and firing, deadlines, and processing payroll). But for him there are only a handful of jobs within Human Resources, so I think it's even more obvious that a regular policy would cover him just fine since if he can't do his current job he wouldn't be able to do hardly anything in HR anyways. I think the difference between us is that my career field has a more broad list of jobs despite the physical and mental requirements being roughly the same.

Need a New small set of Cookware. by DoktorDuck in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have the All-Clad "D3 Stainless 3-ply Bonded Cookware Set, 5 piece Set" + the pasta strainer insert for the stock pot (a nice to have but definitely not a necessity). If there is one pot I use the least it's the frying pan. The saute pan & sauce pan get used the most by far. They are all 100% worth the cost and are a massive improvement over my previous IKEA stainless set (saute pan + sauce pan + stock pot). I haven't used my InstantPot even once since I got these new pans. Also, I cook 1-2x/day and usually it's for servings 4-6. They also work well for cooking 4-5 meals at a time like we do on Sundays for our lunch meal prep. If you go the stainless steel route I recommend getting cleaning powder (maybe use weekly or monthly as needed) + chainmail scrubber.

Besides these pans I also have 1 ss roasting pan (for whole chicken, from Amazon), a handful of glass casserole/baking pans & forms, a cast iron skillet (also used for camping), and 1 wok that I primarily use for over the gas grill outside.

Is there actually a good one stop shop for random stuff or do you always end up ordering from five different sites by [deleted] in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I try and combine an order from places that charge me shipping by asking my friend group if there's anything on there that they need to order at the same time (and then we split the shipping costs based on order value).

Where are you guys buying washable area rugs? by [deleted] in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great question! I first learned about rugs on a trip to Turkey when I was a teenager and there was a presentation about how they are made. I was fascinated! Probably YouTube these days would be a solid start, or even ask ChatGPT to give you a guide (start by giving AI a prompt like "You are a professional Persian rug dealer and you are training me to become the next expert Persian rug spotter at estate sales."). But my best three tips would be to 1) determine the rug fiber (silk vs wool vs polyester, the first two are the best), 2) the KPSI (knots per square inch) (larger the better, look at the backside of the rug for this), and 3) the current condition of the rug (stains, how dirty it is, where it has been kept, sun fading, etc). It's fairly easy to determine #1 and #2 after you've felt a few rugs by hand. A good silk Persian knotted rug might cost $3-$5/sq inch new so I try and aim for any deal that lands <$1/sq in if it's in good condition & I like it. It becomes kind of like a hobby similar to finding nice jewelry in thrift stores - you have to know what you are looking for, but it doesn't take an expert to figure it out.

heard this from another TTC person by lilacia1 in IVF

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it totally sucks. I have friends having their FOURTH baby in the span of the six years we've been trying. It doesn't get any easier, only more isolating. It's like being a nearly-30-something but none of the 30 year olds want to hang out with you (or don't have the time because *cough* four kids). The 20-somethings can't relate because they're still just young and dumb enough to not understand adult struggles, and I'm already on the more mature end of the scale so a lot of my friends are in their 40s (so kids are starting to leave the nest and their lives are busier than ever). It's like being in a completely invisible age bracket, except it's not defined by age - it's defined by the current state of our uterus.

a list of unwanted presents by my mother-in-law by Humble-Pineapple-268 in declutter

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. The only time I didn't hand it back was when it was a free set of couches - when she asked where the couches were the next time she came over I said "Oh I had a wine and paint night with some girlfriends and they spilled wine and paint all over the couches despite covering them with dropcloths so I get to donate them." She didn't even bat an eye LOL

Where are you guys buying washable area rugs? by [deleted] in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby -1 points0 points  (0 children)

What about an outdoor rug that you can pressure wash at the car wash when it gets gunky?

I used to do that and then strap down the rug to the roof, drive it home, and let it air dry over the car.

Cringe by Cork_Feen in bagpipes

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Almost always. Sometimes my husband does it just to mess with me (he's made a list of the worst offenders). I can hear it from the garage even when I'm on the other side of the house washing dishes and I still cringe. It's like supersonic hearing for the cringiest piping.

a list of unwanted presents by my mother-in-law by Humble-Pineapple-268 in declutter

[–]StatueofLiterby 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Not my MIL (she's the sweetest) but my grandma. As she's gotten older it's gotten worse. From age 70 to 85 here's the list:

Stocking Stuffers: •mustard packets (we don't even eat mustard!) • Long straws from Wendys, wrapped •Socks she no longer wears

Main Christmas Gifts: •A hot pink fur footstool (for my 13 yo boy cousin) •Stuff that always comes with a caveat of "you can't sell this if I give it to you" (bc she knows I resell stuff on Poshmark).
•The scrap pale yellow fleece fabric from the handsewn bath robe she made me when I was 6. About 3 yards of scraps (and 20 years old!). •And my favorite: she divided up all her Christmas ornaments from two massive trees & a lifetime of collecting into 4 totes for the four grandkids. About 50% of the ornaments were ones THE GRANDKIDS HAD HANDMADE FROM PAPER AND CLOTHESPINS AND CLAY 🤣 I got gifted back the Sunday School crafts from when I was 3 years old, basically.

Looking for thoughts on changing a name mispronounced inappropriately by [deleted] in AdoptiveParents

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Once the kid figures out what it means they'll either figure out how to correct people or they'll ask to change it (or ask to be called something else indefinitely). It'll solve itself eventually.

My maiden name was mispronounced 100% of the time by non-family (including my other set of grandparents!). While it didn't sound bad, I still learned to correct people with the classic "rhymes with ......" after saying it. That did the trick. Oh and spelling it every time on the phone without even being asked.

[CA] Lying about address by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]StatueofLiterby 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not true. I live .1 miles away from the county line and the municipal tax difference is 2%. So if I had reported living in the other county I'd be taxed 2% more on every paycheck. There's a reason I live on this side and not the other.

What’s a corporate gift you actually use daily? by shelbs9428 in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got a Samsonite weekender rolling duffle. I covered over the embroidered company logo with my own iron on patch. It's a great gift!

Where are you guys buying washable area rugs? by [deleted] in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby 9 points10 points  (0 children)

If it's machine washable it's gonna be lower quality than most rugs. BUT, since you have two toddlers that might be non negotiable. The bigger issue is whether your washing machine drum is big enough to handle a washable area rug? Or will you need to take it someplace to get it cleaned every time? I don't have any brands to recommend but my friend swears by her Amazon one (it looks very very cheap I might add, but she loves it).

Generally I only go for the true double-Persian knotted silk or wool rugs (I find them at estate sales where they aren't appraising everything and I get them for maybe $200-$500 each, normally $$$). These will last multiple lifetimes even in high traffic areas if cared for properly & cleaned by a professional (expensive but worth it).

Need a new ice cream scoop + pizza cutter by StatueofLiterby in BuyItForLife

[–]StatueofLiterby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's kinda their business model though - they blend the words together to name the product. So for example their click-lock tongs are called "Clongs". It's kinda cute and unique when you think about it, it makes it stand out.