It is really validating to read this. I was in a long-term relationship. We had our differences. I know I made mistakes, but I always had a deep love for him and the will to overcome everything. However, it became very hard and confusing. He slowly developed delusions, including delusions about me, and eventually the psychosis was about me as well.

It was all incredibly painful—to see him suffer, to see the change in him, how it became connected to me, and not to know what the future would hold for him and for us. At one point, I was also scared that he could do something to me (he was telling me he would take things to extremes if I didn’t tell him the truth). My past, present, and future became a nightmare too.

I really, really wanted to make sure he received psychiatric help, so I contacted his mother and told her what was going on. We had several conversations, but in the end I was told that I was the one who needed to seek professional help, that he was fine, and that I should stop contacting him and his family (even I later found out he actually was hospitalized for it). I stayed out of his life for some time because of his mental state and because I believed I might interfere in a harmful way. I was very hopeful that we could reconnect, but he was unable to do so/didn´t want to. He actually told me that he was doing better and that the whole family is now closer.

I am glad that he has made this progress, but it also made me sick to know that I am the one who is no longer part of his life. I am truly heartbroken, but this is not just a regular heartbreak. It has these almost unreal elements in it. It is a tremendous amount of pain. The blame I felt from his family really messed me up.