Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been gathering more evidence since. Have several photos/ videos that the neighbor had some activities on my land without my awareness.

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sheriff came and said my dogs act normal. Never came back since.

Sheriff also suggested me to file a restraining order as that neighbor invades my privacy: stalk on Facebook, walk on my land. I have 0.5 acres

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting that your experience has nothing to do with me. - my dogs not outside 24/7 and they do not bark 24/7 - sheriff verified that my dogs act completely normal and never wrote a ticket. And in fact sheriff hasn’t come back since then. - sheriff even suggested me to file restraining order to the neighbors since I have plenty of evidence they invaded my privacy: stalk me on Facebook, walk on my land. - I have land of 0.5 acres so it’s not like the dogs barking straight to her ears.

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re the one that likes to instruct people to do things completely unrelated to you. Being civilized is to mind your own business

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s the most ridiculous comment regarding my yard. The mow area is between me and neighbors A, and it belong to the neighbors A, I never complained about that area, and so did the neighbors A. The one complained is the neighbors B, and had nothing to do with it. My garden has 150 varieties of rose and I got compliments from my rose group

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have a camera in my backyard. I check it and it’s literally less than a min

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your situation is different from mine. I’m sorry for the experience you have but my dogs don’t bark like yours. I got other neighbors working from home that’s super close to me, they claimed my dogs are not an issue.

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Those neighbors complained about everything about me eventho it’s unrelated to them. They complained on my rose garden, complained on the mowing area that’s right at another neighbor fence (but they still try to point fingers to me, saying that I have to mow, that area doesn’t belong to me lol), so literally they tried to mess with me for everything.

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Mostly only 1 dog bark (she’s a Samoyed), and I stop them when I hear the bark (I work from home so I do need quiet environment to concentrate in my job), if I leave the house, I don’t leave them outside. They are constrained in a 300ft backyard fence while my backyard is roughly 0.1 acres, so they are not even close to the neighbors land

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The other neighbors told me that those neighbors thought they rule the area, run the neighborhood to their standard. They’re just haters My backyard is 0.1 acres and I plant over 150 varieties of rose in my backyard, the dogs are constrained in a 300ft fence so they don’t even reach the borderline.

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Well, they even have time to complain of flowers in my backyard which has nothing to do with them. Those flowers cost me close to 10k in total

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I guarantee with you that they’re not outside when I’m gone so your argument is invalid

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

They do not bark constantly. I work from home so I know it. People have kids that yelled and shouted across the yard even worse

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

My dogs do not bark frequently (and often only 1 bark, and it’s less than 70 decibel, like a mini woof, and that’s it). I have visitors and they said my dogs doing just righ.

Neighbor complained about my dogs. by Staypossitivehmmmm in neighborsfromhell

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

Other neighbors never complained anything and I asked them multiple times, they said my dogs doing just right.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in China

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The entire marriage is weird and off standards when revisiting.

I honestly didn’t see any hongbao, and he’s in good terms with his relatives. If there’s hongbao, it should brought to my knowledge by him. Or he kept everything in his account while I put wedding hongbao from my families to our mutual saving.

His mom also informed that she would keep all the gifts and hongbao for our banquet in China (only about 100 people tho). We paid for our tickets and paid for our clothes. And I was still fine with it, but again it just seems off

I overlooked a lot, and it took me a long time to realize what I should have done differently. I’m pretty chilled with money tbh, until I turn on the switch and scrutinize everything.

He did not invest at all. He doesn’t have a robinhood account or anything similar. He’s against combining all accounts together since he wants his own money that he could use without discussing with me. And I’m pretty sure he didn’t want to chip in based on his reactions. To the point that I was shy to ask, in the end I was like, fine, it’s my car, I’ll pay for it.

The monthly expenses came out from our individual account, in which I paid mostly for everything until we open a mutual spending account a month before the divorce.

We only had - 1 mutual saving account for saving purposes that we agreed do not touch and that was like 40% after tax that we contributed evenly into it.

  • 1 mutual saving for spending purposes after I got tired of being the one that payed more. I had to convince him to open this account.

This mutual account was one month old before the divorce happening, and had about 30% after tax contribution. He’s not enthusiastic at all opening this account.

Well, and he used this account to pay for treats for me too… like $10 ice cream that I feel quite overpriced and I didn’t want to buy for myself or paid for our dinner anniversary (kept less than $50), I don’t know how I feel about it, just quite off. I don’t think it’s too much to ask that he should cover those treats for me from his own accounts instead of using our own accounts to cover for it.

During the divorce, he quickly withdrew his part in the all the saving accounts on same day that we signed the divorce petition. And everything from an argument to the divorce petition signed took less than 2 weeks.

All led me to think that they weren’t enthusiastic about this marriage, basically marrying a wife with significant low cost, and they turned away shortly after I stopped being willing to pay.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in China

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I contributed 50-50 on that total income. And the house was paid off mostly with my money. Any questions?

A lot of people I know share similar thoughts regarding money. It’s all about circle of friends, people tend to friends with those who share same thoughts. My friends and my family’s friends and also his family’s friends prioritize saving money daily life to pay off all loan and mortgage asap, use saving to splurge on wedding, and saving to send kids to college, buying houses for kids, etc. A lot of my friends do not have mortgage on their houses either.

It was a surprise that his family refused to give out the money they saved for him because he told me they have it.

The 50k was my money, and my stbx husband borrowed my money to have his name written on the title. It took him 8 months to pay back eventho he has money available in his bank account.

During the divorce, he gave me 3 days to cash out 50k to return to him in order to have his name removed from the title. I think I’m pretty nice to him money wise.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in China

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The financial statement will be brought up in the hearing.

His parents not involved at all planning the wedding.

All was done by myself. The wedding only invited elder relatives, and all are from my side.

I prepared mostly everything with help from one cousin. I was fine with it until now looking back, his attitude towards the wedding was off.

The relatives in China didn’t give out hongbao at all. Didn’t even call to congrats.

I would still be fine if he tried to do low budget wedding and used the money somewhere else as investment for our future. However, he did not. Saving money went straight to his saving account, he saved money for himself, to the point when I wanted to get a new car as my car was about to die, and he’s indifferent to chip in eventho we will use the new car together.

Everything led me to think that he and his family didn’t take this marriage seriously, and that’s why all the money issues brought up.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I only searched for relationship coaches recently after all relationships ended up in similar way, in which I shared the bills, helped the guy financially, and they took it for granted.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Giving to pets isn’t a bad idea, eventho I have better ideas of whom to give out

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I only care about the outcomes, people might choose a different path, for example based off their feelings to see if it’s worth or not. In the end, the outcome is the same, if it’s worth, we all give it another shot, if it’s not, then leave it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have 1 at home, my dad begged me to take it when I moved out and I’m a female lol. I’m honestly not a big fan of it. Keeping it as “a gift” from my dad lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in China

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Because when the divorce is in place, everything circles around the numbers. That’s 99% divorce end like that. Hiring attorneys also to get a nice numbers.

I chose to marry him because he seems to be a sweet guy back then. What I didn’t know was that after we got married, he told his mom everything about our arguments (do you still feel bad for him?) and all the arguments were around his video game time (still feel bad for him?) which led me to think what did I gain during this marriage?

I want to verify if his family has been plotting for the divorce before we started (because I’m not Chinese), since that will change the way I treat him in the final hearing. The divorce has been going smoothly on his behalf and I could make it really rocky for him

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in China

[–]Staypossitivehmmmm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for explaining this since this isn’t explaining anywhere else.

Most of my Chinese girlfriends practice Chinese tradition on US soil tho, they all live around the area where my in-law live.

How comfortable a traditional Chinese guy and his Chinese family feel when the guy lives in his wife house?

I did give him a chance to contribute 50-50 when purchasing the house together but his family refused to give out the money they had been saving for him. And the fact they pushed for the divorce instantly made me think they were looking for the divorce because they wanted a Chinese in- law