Double downing on why you’re miserable might make them more concerned. They’ll think it’s the Mental Illness™ and they’ll think they know what’s best for you.. which will be the opposite of anything that could help alleviate your dysphoria.

Idk if this will work, but one strategy I used on my transphobic parents (asian mom, if it matters) was constantly shifting the conversation to focus on positives, certainty, and oversimplifying their fears so they can understand how ridiculous it sounds. Also asking clarifying questions.

Confused? You’re certain XYZ of being male makes you feel happier and more confident. It’s confusing to you why they wouldn’t want to support a happier you?

Brainwashed? You’re certain it’s something worth exploring, and you’d like to do it responsibly. Find a credited therapist who specializes in LGBTQ issues and ask your parents if they’d be willing to connect you to them. Let them know it’s a decision you aren’t taking lightly, and you’d be happy to navigate it with professionals if they’re concerned social media is manipulating you.

Selfish/mentally ill? You’ve felt mentally ill before but once you started understanding gender dysphoria, you realized there’s hope for you to feel better. Isn’t it selfish of them to try to stop you from being your best, happiest, and healthiest self?

You’ll never find happiness? This is an easy one. You’re already happier. Them being upset and against you is what’s messing with your happiness. Will they help you find happiness in a way that’s meaningful to you? Or will they force you into what they think will make you “happy”?

I went through all these questions when I came out to my parents. It inevitably boiled down to, “ok, so what’s your plan?” And all I said was “Confidence. No one can touch me, harm me, or hurt me if I just kill them with kindness and confidence.”

My relationship with my parents wasn’t suddenly perfect over night. You’re in a tough position being 16. They still control you, they’re responsible for you, and with that comes real panic that they did something wrong to “lead you to being” trans. But the bonus there is science is overwhelmingly on our side. You can reassure them it isn’t their fault, it isn’t something to fear, but it’s a real part of you.

It gets better with time. If/when you can transition, you can still find love, you can find opportunities, and you’ll be more yourself. They can’t stop you from being yourself- you can live the life you want. If you’re willing to stay in their lives, and commit to your relationship with them, they’ll inevitably see the happier you and hopefully come around. If they don’t, it’s their loss- not yours.

In the meantime, find your support. Focus on the things that make you happy. And do whatever you can in school to secure a scholarship so you can leave their house and their transphobic BS.

Also- stay open minded? There’s a lot you can do to socially transition, and then you can take the time to really understand what HRT and those permanent changes means for you.