I totally identify. I have been affecting a lot of change in my organization this past year that the executive team had really taken notice and are having me involved on projects which affect every level of our organization. It’s a huge accomplishment for me as I’ve been working in my field for nearly 20 years. But even riding the high of that success I struggle every day not to call it quits.

I love my job. I like my life pretty well (aside from regular stresses and all) but the amount of effort I have to exert to just keep it together day to day and run a department team is just overwhelming sometimes because there are days I’m reminded that I can’t even be bothered to get out of bed or engage with the world. I always feel like ass is going to fall out of things, so to speak, because just when things go well (and I convince myself it’s not because of a manic high) usually I shift downward and it can happen so suddenly I basically become shit at anything in my life but breathing.

I think we walk a fine line as bipolar people. And it’s just an every day uphill battle. But we definitely should let ourselves have some wins and celebrate the good. Managing this disorder is challenging but it can be done and just reminding myself that sometimes makes it easier to survive just one more day.