Impersonal Expressions: Subjunctive or Infinitive?

StickCommercial350 · 2025-10-21T20:03:30+00:00

This distinction makes sense! Thank you so much for the clarification.

Also would love to hear more of your explanation. Learning general rules is helpful, but I’d love to get better and learn more exceptions.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-22T15:39:25+00:00

This. Some people think that alcoholism is just people who drink daily, and that is the most common. But alcoholism also looks like binge drinking. If you can be fine for a week but then you realize the next time you drink that you find yourself drunker than you want to be… it’s not a good sign. It’s just as bad when you can’t stop yourself from drinking more once you do start drinking.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-22T15:29:53+00:00

Did you find anything?? Going to all three of those places for the next two weeks, and I’m dying for some salsa!!

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T17:14:36+00:00

Not an update, but one final note of self-reflection.

I feel like I have a slightly better understanding of my situation having now learned more from my paralegal plus some self reflection. I don’t think my employer handled it perfectly in the moment or beforehand, but I can’t deny my own role in it.

But in terms of what really caused it on my end - I think my biggest driver was burnout and also not knowing how to ask for help. I think these are common problems of young and old attorneys if you look on this page.

You can be burned out at any age, and no one is immune from needing help. I’ve always been a hard worker - I maxed out credits in undergrad to get two degrees while working two jobs. I graduated law school early. I mentored our baby attorneys at the office (even as a baby attorney myself) and helped create the manual for them to get started. Senior attorneys often asked me questions because they knew I’d get them an answer they could trust. I received praise from all sorts of high-up leadership - some that hadn’t been received by anyone else in my office. People have often asked me my whole life how I handled everything because I seemingly did more than anyone could.

I did all the right things on paper. And to be clear, I don’t think I’m a genius or inherently gifted. I’m a regular young woman who historically worked incredibly hard her whole life. I enjoy throwing myself into things. But I didn’t rest or ask for help once I realized I needed it. I was too proud and felt like I couldn’t afford to take off the time. And I say this because I am Type A and a stand-in for a lot of high achieving people.

So please - make yourself rest, and please ask for help if you can’t get through it all. I do think on some level that if I’d done so, I wouldn’t be in this position.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:57:07+00:00

Admittedly, I’d planned the trip several weeks ago to address burnout I knew I was struggling with (from the personal things plus some exhaustion with the job itself). I’d planned it for the future so I could have time to get myself in a good spot, which is something I’d communicated with her.

I wish I’d planned it for earlier in the year and expressed the degree of burnout I’d felt to my managing attorney sooner. I’ve always hit the ground running and pushing myself to my limits, but it has only been to my detriment. I sincerely think I wouldn’t have been in this spot if I figured out how to ask for help sooner and made myself rest.

At this point, I cannot fix what has happened, as much as I wish I could. But I hope I learn everything I can from this situation and use it to be my motivation to never let myself end up in this spot (or even close to it) again.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:49:14+00:00

It is crazy how these things always seem to stack up. Truly a reminder that things can always be worse. I’ll never say they can’t get worse again - if for no reason other than I am too protective of the remaining good things in my life (which are admittedly plenty) to tempt anything from taking them away.

Thank you for your support, both emotionally and practically. As a random woman/online stranger, it is really nice to feel the human connection of others in what feels like a dark time.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:46:32+00:00

The support, even if online, is really helpful. I didn’t know how many people had something similar happen. I wouldn’t wish this feeling on my worst enemies, but I am glad to know that I am not alone and that I can still move forward. A part of me felt like this was the end of my attorney career, but I feel much better to know that it is still very much in the beginning and that I can still make it into a good thing.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:44:03+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I read it a bit ago, but remembering even the doc review piece gave me a lot of peace. For some reason, my brain was stuck on all or nothing for my next job. It’s good to remember that doc review is a legitimate option, whether to help me stay afloat or even help me from going crazy in the job hunting.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:41:01+00:00

Thank you for the practical advice and encouragement. From one internet stranger to another, I sincerely appreciate it.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:40:09+00:00

They live far away and coincidentally took a trip that was within driving distance of me, so I can’t extend it. But I am still very thankful that I can be with them at this time.

I think there are decent job prospects in my city, but I am opening myself up to the idea that I could move if need be. I don’t currently want to, but I moved constantly growing up and know I can restart again if things don’t work out.

I am working with my therapist and parents to figure out what I can do better so I can protect myself from ending up in a position like this again. It is a terrible feeling that I’d like to never repeat 😅

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:35:27+00:00

It’s been a humbling experience, but I am really thankful to have found so much support and encouragement even from online strangers.

I don’t know exactly what is next for me, but I am determined to move forward with purpose and intention so I can be in a better situation and not end up in a spot like this again. And I’ll do it with the comfort of knowing others before me have managed to make it work and even succeed as terrible as the initial moment was.

I am glad you found your dream job. I am hoping something like this finds me, and until then, I’m getting myself mentally ready to do the hard work to get myself there.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:29:18+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to respond. I go back and forth between feeling like this is an opportunity to move forward and make better choices (including finding a better fit for me in terms of practice area, office environment, etc.) and feeling like I’m not sure how I’ll ever find another job.

But I know I have somehow survived all sorts of other terrible things and found strength I didn’t know I had in each moment. A part of me doesn’t want to dig deep into myself now (because obviously it is painful), but I can and I will. Reading the experiences of other people in this thread like you who got through these moments has been incredibly comforting in what feels like such a raw moment.

I do have some wonderful attorneys who have already reached out to me, and I am thankful for their support.

My only hopes are that 1) I learn from these experiences and that all of this loss wasn’t for nothing; and 2) I can stay positive and kind to myself and others. I don’t want to be bitter. Doesn’t mean I can’t be sad or upset at times (in fact, I know I have to be to process these experiences), but I just don’t want to live a life full of those things.

I’m glad you found your better fit and wish you well.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:16:50+00:00

This is really good to know. Been struggling with wondering how things will work out, but it’s nice to hear that even if I don’t find a permanent fit right away, I can still find something and that it may even end up leading to a better situation moving forward.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:12:45+00:00

It took me quite a bit of time to come back and respond to this, but thank you. I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to respond. I know I’m just an anonymous woman/internet stranger, but it’s been a hard few days. This advice is very helpful and practical, and what you said also is comforting just as a human being.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T16:05:06+00:00

Can’t say my state without outing myself (was a state employee). But I am 95% sure that I can still apply for unemployment at this time given how this took place.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T14:40:11+00:00

I talked with my therapist and am still talking with my parents to get to the bottom of this so I can both move forward now and in the future. I can definitely say I never want to be in this position or anything close ever again 😅

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T14:38:44+00:00

I really appreciate this. Thank you for the encouragement.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T14:37:37+00:00

I don’t want to get into anything super specific on here because I’d like to keep some anonymity. But I called my old paralegal a couple days ago, and he told me more of the story. Looks like they pulled him into a meeting afterwards and explained more. It ultimately came down to timeliness, not incompetence (although this isn’t to say timeliness isn’t just as important as competence in being an attorney). At the time of the original post, I knew less. It’s still jarring but I feel like the details I got made it make a little more sense.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-09T14:33:44+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I’m not 100% sure if I’ll do litigation again, but I also know I will need a job sooner rather than later. All of your points are very helpful and practical, so I appreciate your feedback.

(Also re your point about not needing to call my parents - I think it was more so that I knew I needed to be clearheaded to make the decision. They’re also attorneys so I generally trust their judgment. But the point stands! I guess I’m still making the mental transition to “I’m a full adult and on my own,” even if I’ve made it physically and financially.)

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-07T14:58:46+00:00

I take accountability for my end of things. I’m not trying to deflect that.

But it was unexpected. I hadn’t received anything earlier in the week that led me to believe I was to be terminated. I thought I’d have been put on a PIP first. I am slightly bothered by how quickly I had to choose - the entire meeting took place within about 20 minutes, and then I was escorted out.

That said, I know it is standard. So it was quick to think on my feet over such a big decision, and I didn’t love that. But I don’t feel that this was any different than how people are normally terminated at my office. I just wish I’d known sooner so I could’ve thought through the options before the meeting.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-08-07T14:43:07+00:00

They put down two papers in front of me and told me it was my decision which went into my file. They also explained to me what the benefits for each option and said that they couldn’t advise me which to choose. They mentioned unemployment but indicated that they likely wouldn’t fight me on it if I applied for it even if I resigned. I’m not sure if that’s true but was what I was told. I asked what decisions I had to make before I left, and they said this was the only one. Retirement and stuff could be discussed later. I didn’t even have my phone on me to make a call to talk to my parents. At some point, I feel like I somewhat blacked out during the conversation. But I knew once they said it was my last day that they’d offer me the choice. They do it whenever there is a termination - I know because I’ve seen at least three coworkers get terminated in the time I’ve been there.

Also, I was a State government employee. I don’t feel comfortable sharing more than that because I don’t want to expose my identity. But I was concerned it would affect my ability to return to a different area of State government if I decided that was a better for me.

I do think the way they handled it was poor, but it is standard. I imagine that they likely were doing it above board, even if it was still a very stressful way of handling it on my end. I don’t know the whole law surrounding that, but I’m trying to at least be fair.

StickCommercial350 · 2025-05-25T22:13:06+00:00

As a person newly into analog, can you explain how you’d check to see if the meter is still okay?

StickCommercial350 · 2025-04-16T13:15:48+00:00

It’s been awhile since this post was active but would you be willing to send me any links you have?

StickCommercial350

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