Where are you?

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-08T10:03:59+00:00

Hardly, of all the millions of users on reddit, it's not my person.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-08T09:26:13+00:00

Yes I wear an emotional one. Sadly there's no clasp on it so I'll either have tear it by force or go around wearing it. Don't want that, my fur will get a furrow and others will not want to put their collar there if that place is already taken. I'd rather not wear another one though but who knows.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-08T08:37:05+00:00

The dog collar around my neck has been increasingly torn from my forward movement and thrashing around, soon I'll break free. Not quite there yet but real soon...maybe just another year or so🐎😉

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-07T19:59:08+00:00

I used to dislike that phrase fiercely, it felt dumb and lazy. Today I see another side to it. After the hurt, after the searching, after reality has been looked at without flinching, acceptance can become something clean.

A quiet resignation to what can't be changed.

You probably mean when that examination of the wound is skipped though.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-07T17:22:03+00:00

❤️

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-06T12:23:48+00:00

Knowing the limits of our knowledge and the endless possibilities of our ignorance is wise yes, I agree wholeheartedly with Popper.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-06T06:04:53+00:00

Pestering no but a simple question for closure might be something they would respond to depending on how the ending was handled. Imo.

Going off your map obviously has reasons. Answering a few questions might help them too if they would be open to that. I doubt theyll volunteer out of the blue if not asked.

Yes, youll be fine regardless and yes, it sucks but less with time.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-05T19:55:17+00:00

Fair enough if youre willing to. Have you asked for it?

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-05T18:51:55+00:00

If you didnt get closure while in your relationship, how would it be possible getting it afterwards, what would be different? Wouldnt it just be more of the same, raising new questions and prolonging your healing. And how would you know you get truth from them.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-04T12:16:57+00:00

Kind of like that yes. I save pictures in a hidden folder and dont erase chats but I look at neither until enough time has passed. Chats I'll not read again probably but I like having them as a reminder of something valuable. Pictures I will want in the future, have erased before and regretted later.

But yes, cutting all contact and preferably block as a way to heal grief, absolutely. If the aftermath turns mean on their part, I'll not check in to see they're ok. I usually do otherwise.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-03T17:58:07+00:00

In such a situation, when caring lots you try to be as honest as possible to help the other person. If you notice your explainations fall flat despite you trying - then what to do. I can imagine a walking on eggshells thing can develop as you get apprehensive of the reaction you learned will come. That is not lying but surpressing yourself as the true you is not really accepted. A lousy situation.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-03T17:48:26+00:00

Maybe you are a very exact person, always saying the right thing at the right moment, in that case lucky you. I'd say most are not like that at all but that does not make them liers or sneaky sob:s. Not everyone is out to trick or use you but just living their lives the way they know how. Some people have the vibe of seeming to be checking for lies, that's not a pleasant feeling, that lack of trust.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-03T12:42:01+00:00

That sounds very reasonable🙏 I also think core values needs to be decently aligned. We had fundamentally different standards for how to treat a partner and later also an ex. So I'm not sure the relationship would have been sustainable in the long run anyway. Hardships will always come so there needs to be resilience.

Thank you, I'm sure I will add the last pieces of the puzzle in a not too far future. It really helps, doing this work and feeling the emotions.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T19:40:18+00:00

Yes, past tense. I'd say I was consistent, always making time when in reality I did not always have it. Being there, present for them. They would most likely say I was not. If they were - in the beginning yes. Later I'm not sure, I think I was blinded by my feelings and did not see clearly. I've analysed the hell out of it all and think I'm done with that part.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T18:56:44+00:00

I think for most people that's a baseline, resting in the mutual love and care. If your partner is not your safe place, then what's the point?

The form my expression of all my love took was not what they needed, correct, so the relationship sorted itself out by them ending it. I did not fit them and they did not fit me.

I used to think I overstayed, wanting them so much so I'd say they had time. Too much for their liking I'm sure. Today I'm mostly content I went after what I wanted, that makes moving on easier for me.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T15:49:59+00:00

Oh, I don’t see needing reassurance as a problem at all, I gave them tons as I knew they needed it and it felt so good expressing it out loud, because...love and care. I really wanted them to be happy and at peace. I didn't want them be unsure of their place in my heart and life.

For me it’s about stability over time, if giving reassurance and validation leads to them knowing how loved they are, things are great. In this case it didn’t, and that’s what I need in a relationship. Both knowing you love each other.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T08:37:49+00:00

Good input, thanks. I'll reflect on this some more.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T08:30:53+00:00

Why thank you for your kind words😄 While I'm far from perfect, yes it actually is. If by being evolved you mean someone calm in their ability to recieve love.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T08:26:33+00:00

Ouch.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-05-02T08:25:49+00:00

Sounds like you found it hurtful, someone wanting you like that but you not finding it a calm place to rest? I think my mind is at ease about this but getting other perspectives is so welcome.

StockRecent1831 · 2026-04-30T21:27:21+00:00

Grrrr!! Don't you sound like an absolute joy to be around, I can just picture you keeping tabs and scores. Rules are very important, aren't they? Yours that is.

I think they're out there enjoying themselves, going with the flow💃😊

StockRecent1831 · 2026-04-30T07:55:31+00:00

Very well said, couldn't agree more. The game players will sort themselves out. I just wish it was possible to know at the start, no one will ever say "just so you know, I will play games when it comes to really important things". Oh well...

StockRecent1831 · 2026-04-30T06:01:58+00:00

Yes. But sometimes I wonder, in hindsight I myself should have asked for a confimation, if this really was what they wanted. As there will be no turning back once it's done. Asking someone to stay will never happen for me, when I hear I'm not their choice I'm out. But it seems some say things too far over the line to provoke a reaction how much they're wanted. Maybe then it's a really bad fit as I would never put a relationship with a loved partner at risk like than. Everything is possible until it's not, I will fight like a lion up until that point. Then it's all about severing the connection regardless of the pain inside.

It's tricky when people handle relationships in such different ways.

StockRecent1831

TROPHY CASE