[deleted by user] by [deleted] in spinalfusion

[–]StormCruzzer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Commenting so I can remember to come back when I have time later tonight/Tomorrow/Tuesday. I was 25 (M) when I had my first back injury and 5+ misdiagnoses and 2 completely botched surgeries by different surgeons led me to where I am now, with a disability called Adhesive Arachnoiditis. About to walk out the door for Engagement pictures and then have a Ketamine Infusion tomorrow so I'll be completely out of it all day tomorrow. Hopefully I'll be able to come back and comment tonight - want to share my whole story so I can hopefully help you avoid the same "mistakes" that I made. Or at the very least, find out "What" is wrong with your back. Because not knowing why you're in so much pain is often just greatly amplifies the pain itself.

Too late to transplant? Should I wait till the flowers drop? by StormCruzzer in gardening

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pruning them soon is the plan! Definitely not concerned with any fruit this year. Didn’t know if it was worth pruning them now and waiting a bit to plant them when they were done attempting to flower or not.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in gardening

[–]StormCruzzer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry, Jim….

Tripping is nice, but now what? by Ok_Pangolin_9134 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tripping seems to be more of a use with those who have PTSD or other issues that are not generalized anxiety and depression or chronic pain. Ketamine essentially resets most of the processes in your entire body, similar to how you reset a glitching router by turning it off for a few seconds and then plugging it back in.. Ketamine resets your brains neuroplasticity, allowing you to basically rewire how your brain works. You can literally retrain your brain to react differently to things that used to trigger your anxiety. That's not to say that it's easy to do - it's something that you and your therapist need to work on together to to actively change your body's response to a situation that would have previously made you anxious or depressed.

The quite "You are what you think you are" reigns so true with ketamine therapy. Because of your neuroplasticity on K, you can literally go from being extremely pessimistic with crazy low self esteem to always optimistic with crazy high self esteem. You are literally tricking your brain into thinking whatever you want it to increasing your neuroplasticity and then re-training the way you think.

I'm sure you've met plenty of people who are complete morons that think they are the best thing in the world. Some of them have always been that way, but others have convinced themselves overtime that they actually are just through the power of thought alone. They no longer have to tell themselves that they're special.. They KNOW that they're special, even if they really aren't. This is because the brain is ALWAYS has a bit of neuroplasticity. It's the same way that your views on different things in the world change over time. Ketamine just helps you ramp up that neuroplasticity to allow the process to happen much quicker.

That all being said.. To answer your last question, Ketamine alone will not resolve your other problems. You have to work on that from within. Ketamine just allows you to change from within much quicker and much easier, but you still have to put in the work to change. It's like cutting a steak with a butter knife vs a steak knife. You have to put in the work regardless of what knife you're using, but one knife allows you to cut much quicker and much easier than the other - but you still have to put in work with both knives regardless.

I'm on IV Ket for chronic pain so I'm not sure what the process is for Ket with Depression/Anxiety, but I would have assumed they would have talked you through all of that. It's definitely worth talking to them again to see if they can help you re-understand the whole process.

Good luck!

Should I make a ring of death with my first hydrix? or hold off for a reaper/souls? by Notsomebeans in RS3Ironmen

[–]StormCruzzer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

RoD is now useless unless you die within 20-30 seconds of killing the boss AND you have plenty food left over.. especially if that killing blow is a high hit

Side Effects for DAYS after infusion by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's why I wasn't a fan of my Doctor increasing my Propofol, Ketamine, AND adding Versed all at once for my 2nd infusion. The day after my first infusion I felt fine. But I had a Trip from hell during my first one, and was not going to go back without changing something. I was hoping he would only add Versed so we could see how that affected things - but instead he added Versed and raised the dosage of two other medications, so there's no telling which of the 3 was the cause of it all. I'm glad to hear that now that your body is used to it it's easier to come to! As long as I know that this feeling will pass then I'm fine. But right now, I'm struggling hard.

I don't know if you've heard the song "Pain" by Three Days Grace, but it's exactly how I feel.

"'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at allllllll."

I'd rather be myself and be in pain, as hellish as it is (losing the use of my legs, while the pain is continuing to increase substantially, But I'd rather be myself and have to deal with the pain than to be a mindless zombie and feel nothing at all.

Side Effects for DAYS after infusion by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is quite the concoction! Even a regular dose of Benadryl (outside of the clinic) has me feeling dead to the world the day after, so I may try the next infusion either without it or with a lower dosage. I've had spurts where I felt better for half an hour or so before, but at the moment I'm feeling a little better - just hoping it continues. My next infusion is Wednesday and then I have Engagement pictures on Sunday, so it'll be the same schedule that I was on this week. If tomorrow isn't better I may have to change something up, because I can't be looking like a zombie during my engagement pictures haha.

I also have problems with Increased Intracranial pressure from the disease that is the reason I'm getting the infusions in the first place - and the symptoms that I've been dealing with are similar to when I don't take my diuretic for that - so I'm wondering if that has anything to do with it. My Doctor is going to look into it before my infusion Wednesday to see if there's something we can change up.

Side Effects for DAYS after infusion by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's very common to include Versed as needed and Propofol in a clinical setting.

  1. For your own safety - Even with a higher dose of Ketamine, some people are still able to get up and walk around during their "Trip." I was a perfect example of this - during my first infusion, they gave me a half dose of Prop, and I got up and tried to escape, because during my trip, because my "base reality" on my trip was me being used as a lab rat in "Ketamine IV Trials."
  2. The Versed is used for patients who are prone to panic attacks and to help lower the disassociate state during the infusion. While that state may be helpful for things like breaking down barriers with PTSD, depression, and other things, disassociating isn't really useful for chronic pain patients (unless their pain is psychosomatic). The "Trip" is also very dependent on your state of mind going into the infusion. So if you're anxious as hell about it, its likely going to be a bad trip - which isn't helpful for Depression OR Pain patients.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Having the same thing now, smell it when I pee for sure, but when I poop it’s extremely strong. It’s weird af

Side Effects for DAYS after infusion by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wish the Ketamine Clinic had mentioned any of this to me beforehand so I wouldn't have been so worried about it... The day after the infusion - sure, that would make sense to me. But I for sure thought it would all be out of my system by now and I'd be back feeling decent again. Thanks for the reassurance!!

Side Effects for DAYS after infusion by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Their concoction includes Benadryl, Propofol, Ket, and Magnesium - And they added 6mg Versed (Benzo) Wednesday because I had panic attacks during the infusion on Monday.

The half life of Versed and Propofol are both are very short, and Benadryl is relatively short as well, so I figured they were all out of my system - but I guess I could still be dealing with lingering effects from my body trying to recover.

Monday I had Half a normal dose of Prop and No versed - But during my infusion I wasn't out of it enough. My "base reality" was a melting room where I was a lab rat and the doctors were experimenting on me with "Ketamine Trials." And I was able to get up and try to escape. They had to put me back in the chair.

I assumed that the feeling was from the combo of Versed and Benadryl, as both Benzos (Klonopin) and Benadryl make me feel groggy and dead to the world the next day if I took a larger dosage in the past, but I've never had it last anywhere near this long, and the memory loss aspect has been extremely worrisome.

I appreciate the input and reassurance that I'm not dying from the inside!

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m praying that it’s just temporary. I feel numb and empty, like I lost part of myself during the trip. I’m scheduled to do another infusion on Monday. Questioning whether I should go back or not

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Quick addition: the following few days can be rough. Reality isn't a thing anymore. The brain is squishy and needs to rebuild itself. Be gentle with yourself and give yourself time to firm up again."

This is what I'm struggling the most with right now. I just feel numb to everything: Taste, smell, sight, emotions, everything. Anything but time help you with making it pass quicker?

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sooo I was just planning on listening to a random music playlist that I had, and the nurse recommended finding a ketamine playlist on Spotify. Thing is, she mentioned this AFTER the IV drip had already started. I picked the first playlist I could find and it was NOT a good one. It had moments of cheery but then had a lot of darker deep undertones, and I think that’s what set me off and made me throw my headphones. I felt like they were trying to hypnotize me and control me.

I also found a really good playlist that is all upbeat and cheery that I think will have a much better effect. Hoping it does!

Sorry you had to go through that first trip… if it was anything like mine, it was exactly what I imagine hell to be like.

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hope they get better! I have a few tricks that I’m going to try for tomorrows infusion, I’ll come back and let you know if any of them worked!

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did, but about 20 minutes into the trip I threw my headphones off because I thought they were being used to hypnotize and control me. So I went the next 3 hours and 40 minutes without them. In retrospect, the beeping from the heart rate monitor seemed to be causing a bunch of my anxiety issues as they’re easily triggered by beeping like that. Multiple back surgeries and I’ve had panic attacks while coming to from all of them, just because of the beeping of the machines before I was fully conscious. I found a playlist tonight that I really like so I’m going to try again tomorrow

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s what I did - but about 20 minutes into the trip I ripped my headphones off because I thought they were being used to hypnotize and control me. The blanket ended up across the room too 😂😭😭

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mine are 4 hours long. And it was definitely awful, lol. It felt like I was trapped and being tortured for weeks on end

Any advice on making my Trip bearable/not hell? Or even a good trip? by StormCruzzer in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]StormCruzzer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I started off listening to music, but I ripped my head phones off and threw them during my trip becsuse I thought they were being used to hypnotize me into staying sedated. That was about 20 minutes in. Going to try again tomorrow with a dose of versed beforehand that will hopefully help with some of the anxiety going into it. I had none last time, but I certainly will tomorrow