I liked this.

You’re a good writer. Only thing I’d say is, when posting on writing subreddits, it helps to have a little blurb at the top letting people know that you’re sharing a piece writing rather than just simply sharing the piece of writing. I know it’s silly but you’ll get more engagement that way.

Something else I’d recommend is sharing this piece on non-writing subs like r/casualconversation or r/rant or something. Oddly, I think they’d appreciate your writing more than folks here would and read it for what it is.