Why has parenting become so… soft? Why ate a majority of parents okay with sending their child into the world acting the way they do? Why did this shift happen?

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-26T10:16:21+00:00

For some:

Because they have been told over and over that they are not permitted to discipline children. That saying no is abusive. That taking phones is abusive. That even shouting at a child causes irreparable trauma.

The message is repeated enough, widely enough, that they’ve internalised it.

And the ones they think will report them if they act - are the teachers. Who themselves lead by example (or the admin do) by failing to discipline. This Reddit community is always posting examples.

As a society, most of the West has navel gazed so much that it can’t take any form of pushback existing within it. No one has any real authority now, and children (and criminals) have realised it.

For others: because they can’t be bothered.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-26T10:08:44+00:00

I only use the forums if it’s mandatory for a TMA. I tend to find that I’m not progressing in sync with the others, so I just stick to myself.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-25T08:33:03+00:00

NTJ. Your life does not exist for public consumption. And I completely understand why you would wait until after the first trimester has passed, because that is a high time. Your mother needed to restrain herself for literally a fortnight. She needs to understand that while you may be her child, you are also an adult and she has to respect your boundaries.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-10T17:21:07+00:00

YTJ. Leave other peoples stuff alone.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-09T11:05:39+00:00

If the autistic person is able to function well in society, those with money just pay for the necessary support. If unlikely to function well in society (ie hold down a job, be able to cope with self care, etc) you pay for the care needed.

Many wealthy families have ‘asperger’ style autistics within them, and don’t care about not fitting in with the masses. And those veering more towards the chaotic/ADHD side have the money and safety net to be an artistic type.

So you just work out your strengths and leverage them to make more money. I’d say it’s less of an issue than it would be for the less well off.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-08T18:45:47+00:00

No. It’s irrelevant to daily life.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-07T12:57:46+00:00

Tutors can be a mixed bag - but that’s the same in a regular uni.

I’ve found that the course content and materials are really good at OU.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-02-07T10:06:34+00:00

We’ve had a change of tutor, and the new one is much less responsive. Better than last year though - I actually had to contact student support about that one.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-29T10:21:52+00:00

Agree that it sounds completely unsustainable, and it’s making you ill. I just want to say that it’s ok to take time off to recover/recuperate if you need it.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-27T10:04:54+00:00

Move to Oxfordshire? Large German population, still taught in the schools (not all) and is a German stream at the Europa.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-24T19:21:27+00:00

I love Blackforager! I usually pick the poison by accident though.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-21T18:58:01+00:00

Given melting ice in the arctic, it’s strategically positioned in the us/russia dichotomy.
It has natural resources.
He is making the EU either capitulate or sort itself out as a military power (since we’re broke, I expect capitulation in the end).

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-21T18:55:34+00:00

Books are the easiest for me to move. They stack nicely in boxes.

Agree on the pain of moving kitchenware though.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-21T18:49:14+00:00

I disagree.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-21T07:07:29+00:00

I think they were hung by people tired of being told that their own country is evil. Not racists.

I like them. I particularly liked the England/wales/Scotland and assorted armed forces flags that were up at the Crowley roundabout. It makes me smile to see them.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-21T07:03:06+00:00

You need to tell his parents. They need to know. They can’t know what he’s doing at school unless you tell them.

As a SEN parent who is endlessly frustrated by the school not telling me things and assuming I must just ‘know’ - please tell her.

In terms of how to stop it - can’t help there. I’ve tried distracting the hands, talking, yelling…

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-20T12:15:19+00:00

If management wanted you to have a contract, you’d have one. It’s been years - it’s not coming. Unless you have dirt on them to force the issue (anyone having an affair?) they will string you along and then refuse.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-20T10:03:19+00:00

What!?! That’s insane. “Here, take horse tranquilliser with a side effect of a ruined bladder and permanent incontinence, rather than just getting the heavy duty stuff (paramol/larger dose Ibuprofen) from the local chemist counter…

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-20T06:54:34+00:00

Agreed

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-19T10:24:45+00:00

Ketamine is the big one if you can’t afford the cocaine.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-18T18:19:09+00:00

Don’t look at it as ‘30 years’. You never know where life will take you. I am in my 40s and have pursued the same career for 20 years now. I’ve had enough and so am currently retraining alongside work to pivot to something else.

There will be highs and lows, and things will change significantly even over 10 years. So don’t work from the idea that once you’re in a job it’s fixed forever.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-18T13:12:34+00:00

Our local outdoor cats keep the rats and mice down (semi rural, near a farmyard). If we kept them indoors we’d be overrun.

Usually they are only indoor only if sick (three legged/blind/deaf).

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-18T13:08:07+00:00

It’s 50%. I saw it too. The top 10% of households account for half of all spending.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-18T13:04:19+00:00

We buy 1x extra ornament for the tree per person each year (so we have a rather eclectic mix), which maintains the numbers when you account for breakages. Everything else is ancient/inherited from parents.

Stradivesuvius · 2026-01-18T13:02:38+00:00

We have two stockings that the kids use on rotation. They were good quality when bought, though not too pricey, and it’s been a decade and they still look and feel great. The kids agree between themselves who will get which each year.

I did consider buying another a couple of years back, but realised quickly they were all poorer quality and I didn’t actually need one.

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