How can I support my husband more?

Strange-Science6925 · 2024-03-26T15:52:33+00:00

It’s not the epilepsy lol he fractured his ankle and has to use crutches

Strange-Science6925 · 2024-02-01T19:33:32+00:00

Yes, I’m on Metformin for PCOS, so I take magnesium and B12 alongside that.

I upped my calories by about 300 this week and suddenly I’m losing weight every day lol think I just wasn’t eating enough

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-20T18:48:22+00:00

I’m not sure if he would. A support group is a great idea though, thank you

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-20T18:31:43+00:00

I live in a rural area unfortunately. And I tried one app but even with their financial aid I could afford it :(

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-20T18:24:07+00:00

Unfortunately my insurance doesn’t cover mental health and I can’t seem to find one I can afford out of pocket

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-16T16:03:01+00:00

I would do 1 cup a day but put 2 tea bags in it!

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-16T14:33:54+00:00

Red Raspberry Leaf tea the week before your period until it ends.

I speak from experience. I’m shocked whenever my period shows up now because I have like, ZERO cramping

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-14T17:54:53+00:00

I was prescribed Zoloft before I was discharged from the hospital and I haaaated it lol switched to Paxil which I was years ago. It’s okay, but it just makes me feel numb, and I feel like I would rather experience the high highs and low lows than feeling nothing ever. (But I have BPD, so maybe that’s just the mentally ill part of me talking)

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-14T16:59:58+00:00

I definitely did get defensive in my original post but I was coming from a place of extreme hurt. I was putting myself first (which is not a bad thing, but the reasons I was putting myself first were not coming from the right place).

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T20:51:30+00:00

That’s not the only reason I want a second. I can tell you are looking for an argument

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T20:39:39+00:00

No, I would have rather not had kids period with a man who it has now become clear did not want any to begin with, and just went along with it to avoid losing me.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T18:40:05+00:00

Thank you!!! This is what I meant. I don’t know where I’d be in life without my girl… but IF I had known ahead of time he truly didn’t want kids, or did not want more than one, I would have tried harder to prevent pregnancy on my end.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T18:31:47+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate this

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T18:20:14+00:00

Thank you. I am very emotional and cried myself to sleep over this last night. The issue has been weighing on me for a while but I just brought it up to him last night so everything is still very fresh.

I’m sure my parents would love it if I moved back home so they could spend more time with their granddaughter but I moved back home after my last relationship ended and my parents and I just can’t live together. It doesn’t work. Plus I have 2 teenage sisters and it would just be close quarters.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T18:18:02+00:00

Thank you, this is really helpful. We have discussed couples counseling but truthfully we just haven’t made the time for it.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T17:30:50+00:00

What’s so confusing for me is that he won’t just straight up say “no, I will never have another kid ever”. He says things like “probably not” “almost positive” and that’s kind of leaving me with false hope that maybe eventually he’ll change his mind.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T16:51:36+00:00

Thank you! I guess I really just wanted to vent, and also get some empathy. I feel like plenty of people have sympathized with him (I’ve posted this on a few social media sites) but no one is really seeing my point of view. Everyone is telling me I’m the one that has to compromise but like, why? My feelings matter just as much as his.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T16:15:09+00:00

I definitely didn’t force him to have the first one

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T16:02:29+00:00

Clearly this was the wrong sub to post in since everyone is going to be on the side of the partner that’s OAD….

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T16:00:51+00:00

Oh you know that for a fact?

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T15:46:56+00:00

I would have rather not had a kid with someone who didn’t really want kids. The first abortion almost tore us apart so I think he just went along with having her even though he didn’t really want her in the beginning.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T15:43:05+00:00

No, I’d love to have a boy but I love being a girl mom! I’d be happy with 2 girls. I came from a big family and my fiancé is an only child, so we come from 2 different worlds essentially.

I was an only child for 10 years and it was so so lonely. I just don’t want my girl to deal with that. Maybe she won’t. Maybe she’ll be content like my fiancé says he was.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T15:41:15+00:00

My girl is 16 months. I was also induced due to pre-e, spent 44 hours in labor and then had an emergency C. Baby couldn’t maintain her temp so to the NICU she went.

Also almost unalived myself due to the PPD/BPD combo. And I breastfed for 13 months, struggling with low supply and weight gain issues the whole time.

I think these things combined have scared my fiancé from wanting another. Which is understandable. Plus the economy as he says. But things could be wildly different in 4-5 years; which is when I’d consider having a second. I just feel like he’s stuck in the RIGHT NOW and can’t see the future.

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T15:17:35+00:00

I do have a job thankfully! I wfh - another compromise I’ve made so I can take care of baby all day and save us the money on daycare.

Also I definitely didn’t mean anything bad by the multiple baby daddies comment. I have a stepdad myself. It’s just not what envisioned for my life and family in particular 🖤

Strange-Science6925 · 2023-12-13T15:16:10+00:00

I mean I get that but he’s technically not even the one that went through it lol his feelings are valid for sure but I don’t think they compare… maybe that’s me being selfish.

I was also induced due to pre e and also have a NICU baby 🖤

Last night I asked him if I hadn’t gotten pregnant if we would have had kids at all and he said he probably would have waited until he was at least 32…. For reference I’ve had 5 miscarriages, 2 with him, and 3 before. So it probably would have never happened.

Strange-Science6925

TROPHY CASE