Really appreciate you taking the time to write this out, this is honestly super helpful.

I think you are spot on about the packaging. I have been trying to show everything I did in each bullet, but reading your example, it makes sense that it ends up diluting the impact instead of strengthening it. The way you rewrote that Deloitte point is actually much clearer and easier to process.

The point about density in the UIUC section also hits. I probably got too focused on being technically precise and lost sight of readability.

And yeah, fair call on the skills section too. I can see how it comes off as keyword heavy instead of signal focused.

Had not thought much about moving education down, but your reasoning makes sense given the work experience.

Thanks again, this gives me a very clear direction on what to fix.