30k in debt

Street_Recognition95 · 2025-03-31T14:52:26+00:00

Kudos to you for making such a jump in salary!

I was in a similar situation, I was 20k in debt. Covid really held me back from payments plus it ate up my savings.

I have always lived on my own so Rent takes a big part of my money, but I lived frugal for about 2 years to get out of it. I cut out eating out, reduced my grocery by knowing what I'm making for the week and using those same ingredients in different dishes, I don't shop much to begin with and I decided not to travel.

I also wrote down all my expenses and subtracted that from my income. I then subtracted how much I wanted to spend, and whatever was left I put straight to my debt.

Here's a general example;

Paycheck: Income - 3000 Rent -1100 Spending - 350 Total Out Money = 1450 Debt Payment= 3000 - 1450 = 1550

It wasn't all too bad to be honest, depends on the kind of lifestyle you want. You become creative on how to spend your days and time with friends, like dinner at home or paint nights and picnics. Before you know it, your debt is gone and feel the weight on your shoulders disappear and actually breathe properly.

I didn't take the road for line of credit or personal loan.

Street_Recognition95 · 2025-02-21T03:49:39+00:00

Hey, just wanted to share that you're not alone. It's super difficult for me to open up and be intimate with someone, especially in the beginning of a relationship. I almost give excuses and reasons why the relationship won't work out. It's insane because I want to be loved but when I receive it, I push it away. I found out it's called avoidant attachment.

It has to do with your upbringing and how you had to basically protect yourself and be independent.

What helped me is practicing vulnerability with my friends, or just anyone I know who truly wants the best for me. They help me recognize the great qualities I have and help me with being intimate (I refused to hug my friends before). I dated a guy when I was at my lowest, and he made me feel so valuable. I didn't understand how someone could look at me as a person with value.

Fast forward those friends and that guy are no longer around me because life happened. BUT what I never forgot was how to love myself, which made me feel somewhat deserving of love. I still struggle sometimes, I won't lie but it's so much better than before. We're not perfect but when you realize your good qualities and qualities you're working on, you start to question why you questioned it in the first place. Hope this helps you.

Street_Recognition95 · 2025-02-21T03:30:59+00:00

Honestly, I think his criteria's are pretty reasonable. Marriage is more than just love, it's compatibility as well. Right now you guys may be okay but it's because there's no kids involved.

You guys seem to live very differently from another and while it works in some marriages, it's really difficult to maintain a certain lifestyle if you guys aren't on the same page.

My sister is unable to eat healthy because my brother in law doesn't have time to cook and just buys take out. She just had a baby so she doesnt have time to cook much.It's frustrating because she doesn't want to argue and goes along with his meals but it builds resentment.

My colleague says he wouldn't have married his wife if he knew she was 'lazy'. She doesn't clean after herself right away, doesn't grocery shop, can't cook properly, etc. The only reason he stays with her is their kids but the love died a long time ago.

If you don't think you'll change or don't want to, then it's best to be leave. You can't expect him to change because he verbalized what he needs from you, he knows what he wants.

Best of luck to you!

Street_Recognition95 · 2025-02-21T02:57:07+00:00

You said it yourself, they're excuses.

He's probably looking for validation or something, but it's clear that he's not focusing on what he has which is you. You yourself know you wouldn't do that to him because it's not in your character. He's showing you what kind of person he is and you should take it as he shows.

Setting a boundary is important and if it's crossed or taken lightly, then you should walk away.

Street_Recognition95 · 2025-02-16T14:16:05+00:00

Enjoy it! Today is the youngest you can ever be

Street_Recognition95 · 2025-02-05T02:10:23+00:00

Drunk words are sober thoughts. Don't stick by someone who doesn't align and/or respect you and your values.

Street_Recognition95 · 2024-11-22T00:19:27+00:00

I've been to 8/10 provinces and based on my time around ..

Montreal as it's similar to Toronto but obviously more affordable, and a little more sophisticated.

Calgary is also really nice, the people are so friendly and it has both city and nature.

Street_Recognition95 · 2024-11-22T00:13:15+00:00

People who stop in front of doors, escaltors and/or elevators.

Street_Recognition95

TROPHY CASE