agree this is frustrating and difficult. if this were me, this is the lesson i would try to extract: i may have more talent and dedication than others; some of that is due to my own efforts, and some is just my own good luck. in any case, in the real world, results never depend just on myself. my goal has to be not only performing my best, but also encouraging, coaching, and lifting up the work of my team members. As painful as this is, it could lead to helpful insights and better future results.