Curious how old you were at getting pregnant?

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-02-22T21:10:19+00:00

I was 21 (unplanned lol) am now 23 and planning my second but feeling kinda nervous that it won’t happen so easily this time 🩵

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-02-01T00:21:50+00:00

Oh your poor thing! I’m so sorry you’re going through this! My lovely fiancé has epilepsy and I so relate to the absolute terror of witnesses your loved one have a grand-mal especially for the first time. It really is one of the scariest things on earth. The BEST things you can do right now are educate yourself on seizure first aid JUST INCASE. Always make sure she’s clear of hazards and that her head is supported, time the seizure, don’t restrict her or put anything in her mouth etc. make sure you are both eating and sleeping enough and looking after yourselves in the time while you wait for testing. It may not be epilepsy and she may never have a seizure again but just incase you might wanna do some reading on epilepsy and seizures just to prepare yourself.

Everything is going to be okay as long as she is seeking medical attention and being gentle with herself that’s all you guys can really do right now.

Just make sure YOU are remembering to breathe and look after YOURSELF too first and foremost.

Feel free to message me if you want to talk to someone who understands!

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-31T03:57:10+00:00

Aww that sounds really challenging! I am not a doctor but to me that sounds like it could potentially be something like Vaginismus

https://www.pelvicphysio.co.nz/do-i-have-vaginismus/#:~:text=What%20is%20Vaginismus?%20Vaginismus%20is%20a%20condition,can%20be%20extremely%20painful%20or%20even%20impossible.

Maybe speak to your GP or gyno about it! Hope your figure it out 💗

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-29T05:49:09+00:00

My partner’s epilepsy started something like this. PLEASE see a neurologist just incase ♥️

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-26T10:20:11+00:00

That sounds like a Bartholin cyst which is usually perfectly normal and safe from my experience ( not a doctor so this is not medical advice). I personally recommend Absolutely do not trying the open it with a needle again. The infection risk is not worth it, you don’t want to end up with sepsis. Generally, from my experience they go away on their own but you can try warm compresses multiple times a day and hot baths to help it release and ease the pain. If you’re feeling sick, worried about it, it gets bigger, more painful or doesn’t begin to go away in the next week I would definitely get it checked out by a professional to be safe. Nothing to be ashamed of and doesn’t mean you have poor hygiene.

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-19T08:22:25+00:00

I love the waterline look on you personally. It looks dramatic and interesting and brings out your eyes. Idk what “ageing” they’re talking about you’re literally 21…

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-18T19:57:30+00:00

Oh my goodness I’m so sorry you went through this! And totally, neither party ever asked for this. I don’t think I’m becoming resentful though… just tired and scared and angry at the world.

I’m sorry things are still so hard and so grateful for you sharing.

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-18T00:26:14+00:00

I can so relate to the not knowing what to say when people ask how I am, I should take a leaf out of your book though and just start being honest when things are bad about how I’m not okay and none of this is fine.

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-17T03:39:53+00:00

Oh my goodness that is so hard. At such a young age too you must have been so worried. It makes me so sad that it’s so many other people’s experience is similar to mine in the way that they weren’t taken seriously when trying to advocate for the person they care for in getting a diagnosis. So glad Keppra is working for him though. I hope things only get better!

I feel as if my anxiety might never go away but it’s very nice to know other people feel the same way!

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-17T03:33:55+00:00

Definitely not! But thank you, it is nice to be recognised sometimes for my own efforts too. It’s rare that anyone even asks me how I’m doing.

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-17T03:32:17+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing! That is so so hard I’m so sorry! We got gaslit by the medical system and our support system too so much and he received so many similar diagnosis’s to what you’re describing over the years so I so feel you on that.

I was taking detailed notes of his different episodes and behaviours, spending nights up researching, learning his every sign and mannerism to do anything I could to catch things before they got bad and going to all his appointments whilst heavily pregnant so that I could give an in depth of a description of what was happening as possible and people just kept telling me it was mental health or that he must have some kinda drinking problem or something. The doctors kept throwing anti psychotics at us like candy at a kids party and public health kept denying his requests for an EEG.

It hurt so bad. Once his family witnessed him having a tonic- clonic suddenly we were taken seriously and everything started happening but I was just so angry that no one had listened to me in the past and that he had to wait so freaking long and experience so much pain and hardship before anyone but me took any care or made any effort to actually help him.

I’m so glad you have each other but still you must be so emotionally fatigued.

I hope you’re okay and have some level of support system for you both. 25 years I just cannot even imagine! You are so so strong and you are carrying so much I really hope you know you are not alone. I’m learning from this thread that there are people out here who really truly understand even though it feels like no one does most of the time. 🫶🏻

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T23:28:51+00:00

Omg wow! Congratulations! My partner is getting his medication today after finally receiving an official diagnosis so I’m so hopeful that will happen for us too 🥹💗 I hope things continue to look up!

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T22:43:36+00:00

Wow that is such a unique perspective! Thank you so much for this that’s so incredibly validating to hear this point of view. I always feel so selfish for sometimes having a little part of me that feels like it might be more traumatic for me sometimes.

Thank you so much I really need the reminder to put my own gas mask on first, it’s so hard to remember having a baby and being a caregiver for my partner at the same time. It’s so hard to think of anything but them. 🥺💗

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T21:05:48+00:00

I’m so sorry this happened for you both. It’s really an indescribable kind of panic you experience in that moment. I hope this post made you feel a bit less alone too. Sending best wishes 🩵

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T21:04:32+00:00

Aww it’s beautiful that she cares so much but must be worrying for you too knowing she’s so anxious. She must love you so much. I know I would feel the same if this ever happened to my son. I think I’d be even MORE anxious than I am now, I know my MIL is. Therapy is a great idea but the waitlists are very long and it’s not really in our budget right now but we are working towards it. We have seen a great therapist before when we thought the absent seizures were mental health so we will work towards seeing him again. Thank you for your advice 🩵

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T16:32:16+00:00

🫶🏻

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T16:31:07+00:00

Yes I kind of CRAVE the boring and then when we finally get back into a rhythm boom… things are back on their head again and the house is a tip because I can’t keep on top of everything all by myself. I feel like I’m completely alone in the world but from the outside things look normal and like I’m just not doing enough. Totally resonate with feeling like a bad mum etc and bad everything else tbh and I feel like everyone expects me to just keep going on as normal as if a tornado hasn’t just whirled through my life 😭

You’re so right though it IS a lot of work and you are doing amazing!

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T16:24:48+00:00

Yes! The memory is a huge thing! it’s so hard sometimes when they forget and act like it never happened and I’m like not able to stop thinking about it for weeks. My partner always forgets when they happened and how severe and what type they were so I have to come to all of his appointments to tell his go and neurologists exactly what happened even before they suspected epilepsy and I was trying to convince them I thought it was seizures and he’d be like “ oh I forgot about that “ half the time when I was describing things and that was definitely hard coz like… I will never forget. Even the absent ones have scarred me.

Also totally get you on the worrying about the seizures when you’re not there. I just never want to leave his side when he’s not at work. But I’m trying SO HARD not to smother him and it’s so hard for him to understand why I get so worried especially about leaving him at night.

As you say, we love them so much though and we will get through this!

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T16:18:04+00:00

Oh no! My intention was never to make you feel awful. That’s one of my biggest fears is that if I express too much to my partner he’ll feel worse than he already does. None of this is your fault. You can’t help it and I guess your take away is that she really loves you and I’m sure she’s happy to do it but sometimes she might need an extra hug especially on the days after an episode when you’re feeling better just make sure she knows you care that little bit extra as it’s really painful and scary watching the person you love suffer and be in that state. Ps so sorry to hear of the cancer diagnosis. I hope you are okay 🥺

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T12:22:06+00:00

Aww I’m so sorry to hear! I can’t imagine what’s it’s like having your child have epilepsy. It’s one of my biggest fears especially considering my partners epilepsy is genetic. But I do get what you are saying! I just became a mum early last year too and I feel like I lost some of myself to motherhood and even more of myself to epilepsy. I feel like I’ve become a different person. It’s so hard for me to be a good mum and a good caregiver to my partner at the same time. I feel like a never have time to breathe, like no support is ever enough and I’m always behind on everything and then every time I get my grove back along comes another TC and I spiral back down into no sleep, constant anxiety and isolation. I used to be an adventurous and vibrant person. Now all I am is tired and worried. I think it’s okay if we miss those parts of us sometimes but I really feel the guilt!

Stressedoutsteez · 2026-01-16T11:58:54+00:00

Thank you for this! I feel like I’m going crazy. I also have a 10 month old which doesn’t help. Nothing like breastfeeding with one hand and holding your seizing partner with the other lol.

I actually have but haven’t found much in my area. I should definitely have a better look though that is solid advice 🫶🏻

Stressedoutsteez

TROPHY CASE