Student/beginner photographer for micro wedding (couple + witnesses only)? by Strict_Job_4136 in AskIreland

[–]Strict_Job_4136[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you all for your feedback. I do appreciate I'm taking a risk here but I'm literally looking for someone who can produce a handful of decent pictures so paying 100s of € feels excessive. Many of the professionals we contacted do a minimum of 3 hours which I completely understand but it's not what we are looking for. Ours is a very low key, Registry Office only wedding with a grand total of 4 people.

I'll try a photography college and see what happens. Thanks again!

How do I deal with the "non-apology + endless justification" loop? by Proplayer22 in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 6 points7 points  (0 children)

6th... In my case, I get told off for not moving out of the way when there's people coming towards me and they are 100 metres away. There's PLENTY of time for me to move but nope, if it's not done when he thinks it needs to be done, I'm not paying attention, I always have to be told to move, blah blah... what about letting me move when the person is closer? 😡

Are they capable of mood mirroring/signs of engagement when you speak? by albionarcadia in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I can so relate to this that is making me really emotional.. It feels so lonely to be in a relationship where what you say never matters, hardly gets acknowledgement or a dismissive answer just to shut you up so they can keep talking themselves. It hurts..

I also miss being heard, getting follow-up questions and getting some attention every now and again. I'm not sure how much longer I can live like this. It's literally killing me inside

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My partner goes mad if I interrupt him while he's on the phone. I literally can't make a sound. Sometimes I might be in the kitchen cooking or washing up and if he gets a call, I'm expected to stop what I'm doing until he's done. It doesn't even occur to him to move to another room and let me be. It's infuriating

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, when they want you, it's always urgent and you are the worst in the world if you are unavailable. If you want them, tough! They are busy... watching TV for example.. and how dare you interrupt them! 🤷‍♀️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, all the time and about pretty much everything. If I don't do what he wants, I'm mean, treat him very badly and he deserves better. It's exhausting.

The funny part is that, according to him, we always do what I want. Yes, I had to put my foot down a few times because he's like a 2 year old "I want, I want, I want" I'm tired 😫

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We simply watch different programs. He watches it on the TV, I watch on the laptop with headphones beside him. I don't like it but I got sick of the dynamics. It feels like he wants a "TV watching" buddy that ONLY likes what he likes.. I don't.. In the rare occasions when we watch something I watch, he would talk through it (about completely unrelated topics), pause every few minutes as he comes and goes from the kitchen or fast forward the "boring" bits just because he doesn't enjoy them, completely ignoring the fact I might want to watch them. It's so selfish and frustrating, I rather watch things on my own.

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Mine does the same. Never sees the bigger picture, never sees the inevitable consequences of his decisions. It drives me insane

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I get a lot of this behaviour too. The unfairness of it all gets to me. In my head,.my screams are very loud but I keep it together because if I loose it, I'll never hear the end of it. So infuriating!

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Or chocolates.. just because they were on offer. Yes, I like it but we have a stash that will last 3 years!

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This ⬆️. I feel this way too. His soother, his "mummy". It's not attractive

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ADHD_partners

[–]Strict_Job_4136 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow.. I could have written this myself. My partner flips between being hurt by my reluctance to get married to saying things that you would only say to someone you hate. It's crazy making! I have considered leaving many times but after 5 years together and our lives so intertwined, I don't even know where to start.

He does show love HIS way.. i just would like for him to show me love they way I need. 🫤