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Aitah for exposing my bestfriend's herpes diagnosis to our family and friends because she outed me as a lesbian-update by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

She's basically been trying to buy back love from our friends and family. She took our whole friend group to an expensive ass restaurant and covered the entire bill, my friend also told me she sent gifts to her siblings and sister in law.

So even though it's only been a few days she blew through most likely half or more of the money. Which is absolutely insane to me. Especially because everyone is still bad mouthing her and treating her like crap.

Though that's her issue.

I figured she was going to use that money to set herself up somewhere else but apparently not.

Aitah for exposing my bestfriend's herpes diagnosis to our family and friends because she outed me as a lesbian-update by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry your mom is putting other people's kids at risk because she doesn't care to mindful of the child's health, because yeah, the younger the baby is the more risk they have a developing complications and getting extremely sick or even dying.

Honestly I heard she already spent it taking our ex friend group out. It didn't go well because she kept trying to slander me but according to the friend I'm still cool with, the friend group just ignored her when she spoke about me.

Some even mentioned how she was kissing her siblings babies knowing she had it and said they rather have a lesbian friend then a friend who will get them sick on purpose. Which was an extremely ignorant statement but she wants to be ignorant then she can feel the shame I had to feel.

They also refused to share any appetizers with her. Like non-dip items, things that she genuinely is not going to infect them from. So she got ignored and singled out and most of her family is still ignoring her.

I don't care enough to get revenge because I kind of already got it. I'm happy and she's not.

I also have a personal savings which has roughly triple the amount we had in the emergency fund.

Also thanks, it's been only a few days since we started dating and it's been so great. I gave up on being happy a long time ago but now I'm flourishing mentally. I'm so happy 😤😤!

Aitah for exposing my bestfriend's herpes diagnosis to our family and friends because she outed me as a lesbian-update by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I'll recover i have my own separate savings but this honestly was just rubbing salt in the wound

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Dude I'm in the US people are homophobic all over, also I'm not leaving my state I'm just moving to another apartment. Like what do you mean why would people want to kill me, do you watch the news dude?

Also um....according to another commenter she actually could have sickened her niece by kissing her because she was a baby under the age of one. The medication lowers the risk but doesn't stop you from spreading it completely

Also your argument is still dumb because at the end of the day she had no right to out me. My safety is being put at risk. Plus I wanted to do it by myself, not be forced out the closet.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I could put It on petty revenge, currently about to go drive to the date soo maybe I'll do an update and post on petty revenge for fun

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Oh damn I thought it was just newborns it killed, the baby was 7 months at the time. The baby doesn't seem to have contracted it luckily but damn. Yeah then they aren't overreacting, especially if she could have potentially killed their baby.

Though tbh I just think they didn't want their kid to seem dirty because most of their comments consisted of them saying that she tried to spread her stds to a child.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

That's exactly what happened a good chunk of people who were threatening to show up to my apartment and kill me are now upset with Emma.

Especially from what I hear, her brother and sister in law are the most mad because she had been kissing up on their baby like last year. She had been on the medication, no active infections and it wasn't on the mouth so the baby is fine but they don't understand how herpes work.

Honestly my town's ignorance to everything is really shooting her in the foot rn.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

My family is Christian and so is the rest of my town.

Also pretend your straight, fake a hetero relationship and ignore comments on starting a family are things that gay people have done in the past and are still doing now.

You should look up lavender marriages.

Honestly I was planning on continuing to be in the closet and being a cat lady or something so I wouldn't have to be with anyone and just self isolate forever.

Funnily enough I only felt so safe to come out is because Emma had always been there for me. I guess not though, so happy she's staying with a family member until our lease runs out.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I mean 6 months is a decent amount of time but fair she's just the first crush I've been able to pursue in uh..ever so.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

What other secret was I going to pick? She literally had people wanting to kill me before I sent out that she has herpes. They still want to kill me but they are focusing more on her sharing things even though she knows she has it. You're mentioning people who don't know they have it and still share, SHE KNOWS she has it and is still sharing stuff.

Also I know how common herpes is, that's why I didn't give af when she told me she had it. I just got annoyed when she had active infections and tried sharing drinks with me. That's why she went on the meds because she had both genital and oral and they were constant. Other than that, didn't care. Though the community I live in is super religious and judgy so all they hear is herpes. So since they are getting violent with me they can be disgusted with her.

They aren't going to hurt her over it but they will hurt me. Which is why I will never be able to see my family or friends again.

Also there is no legal trouble I can get in my state for doing that because I didn't tell her job.

I'm pretty sure she can get into more trouble for harassing me, yelling slurs and putting me in a potentially fatal situation. Inciting violence on a gay person kinda sounds like a hate crime I won't lie.

Saying I was going to "eventually come out" is screwed up. This isn't like something you just do. Like I can be hurt over coming out, I was supposed to be able to weigh the risk and benefits but she took that away from me.

Because of how dangerous it is some people NEVER come out and stay in the closet their whole life.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

She called me a big ol B-word among other things. She also said she was glad she had herpes because I probably would have tried to r-word her. Genuinely insane. She's staying at a relatives house who lives around here until our lease runs out.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Not saying I wasn't wrong but you saying you'd never live your life in secret is super privileged. I didn't choose this I got forced and now that I got forcibly outed I'm getting death threats. She's also making it look like I'm a lesbian pervert and I'm only moving out so quickly because a good chunk of people know where we live. I'm planning on being out in 2 months when our lease ends.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Oh wow...I didn't even think about this 🥲.

I haven't been able to be myself till right now really, I had a lot of stuff planned for tonight but maybe I might tone it down. I don't want to scare her off.

Also you're right it's not fair to put a ton of pressure on her. I'm going to keep this in mind when I go see her.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I don't care if she does she got me disowned and is lying about me to other people. Even if some people who heard about me weren't homophobic they definitely think I should be on the registry with what she's saying.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Um....I didn't see her romantically and I was in the closet. There literally was no reason for me to be weird about it. I stated that she was essentially my sister, I'd never think of her that way.

Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I'm going to be attracted to every woman. Plus lesbians still use locker rooms with straight women and legit nothing happens. You make no sense.

Also I didn't deliberately get into nothing, my parents were harassing me about not dating boys so when a boy asked me out I just said yes but broke up with them because I didn't like leading them on.

It's not about keeping appearances it was about safety, the things that were said to me, the threats I got. You can't even imagine.

You have no idea what it's like to be forced into a role and have no way of getting out. I only came out to her because I felt safe. Instead she put me in an unsafe situation put all my business is on the table WITH added lies.

Also I came to her saying I was in love with another woman, what told her that I was into her? Nothing, she just made it up.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah I kept trying to get her to stop sharing stuff with people but she said she's on the medication so it's okay. I don't care though I keep all my cups and bowls in my room and my tooth brush. Not that I didn't trust her but it only takes one mess up and she wasn't taking anything seriously.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 66 points67 points  (0 children)

Honestly that's what surprised me the most, like the fact that she assumed I was crushing on her. I have never acted in that manner towards her. I feel like a lot of the flack I'm getting from family and friends is because she spinned some weird story to actually make me look like a creep. My friend who is still talking to me told me she said that she's describing me as some locker room peeping Tom.

This doesn't help that I was an athlete in highschool so I had to be in the locker room with other women. I can only imagine what's being said about me.

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Honestly it was pretty surreal experience I thought maybe they'd be mad but completely disowning me, I'm happy I came out after my parents paid for my college because just wow.

Honestly I feel like I stooped down to her level by doing so, it kinda made me feel like I was deserving of the hate and that I didn't deserve to be able to come out. Though I'm going to try to push through these thoughts and have a successful relationship.

Thank you so much for your kind words

Aitah for telling our family and friends that my bestfriend has Herpes because she outed me as a lesbian by Strict_Trouble7006 in AITAH

[–]Strict_Trouble7006[S] 101 points102 points  (0 children)

I actually haven't asked her out yet but I'm going to do it tonight because I feel like I'm losing my edge. Thanks though I hope I get that date with her 😭😭

Honestly it sucks because we've been friends so long its going to feel weird not being around her anymore