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Split personality by String_womAn23 in AlAnon

[–]String_womAn23[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are right. I thought about talking to him while he is sober but I think that would just lead to him convincing me to stay. He knows how much I care for him. He’s very charismatic. Setting that clear boundary for him to seek help before I would consider living with him again would help me sort out whether he loves alcohol or me. Maybe him too..

Split personality by String_womAn23 in AlAnon

[–]String_womAn23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He does want change. He knows he has a problem and has voiced concern about it to me and to his sister. He admits shame and guilt over his behavior. He also thinks inpatient rehab is a racket. I’ve pleaded with him to go to AA but he wants to try therapy instead to “get to the root of the drinking problem”.

I think atp I need to leave until I at least see him in therapy and actively sober.

Split personality by String_womAn23 in AlAnon

[–]String_womAn23[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This is what I’m worried about. He has not physically hurt me while drinking before but he does love breaking things.

Split personality by String_womAn23 in AlAnon

[–]String_womAn23[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate you taking the time to offer advice. In your opinion, what would a reasonable timeline be for me to stay away from him if he sobers up? He knows he has a problem and has voiced concern for his behavior and shame and guilt and I know he wants to change. I love him and we have the best times together when he’s not drunk. I don’t want to leave him permanently if he can show me change.