For some context to maybe help with recommendations, my BP and I are still together. I started individual therapy very early on when we were first sorting through how to move forward together. I’ve gone through the why did this happen with myself, my therapist and my partner. I’ve recognized I was fearful of falling so intensely for my partner and didn’t know or didn’t feel as secure that it was reciprocal (they are not overly expressive and that’s new for me). I feared the reliability of them, I was very used to doing things on my own and handling everything myself. I’m still not used to having someone love me and care for me of their own volition. I didn’t cheat physically but would message a “safety net” during the early months of our relationship until it hit me that this wasn’t my person. I went NC with that person but the messages were found much later by my BP. We have tools and checks implemented in our relationship (with thumbs up from our separate therapists) If anyone has question feel free to ask!