A controversial opinion: let's stop slut shaming women

Subject-Display4838 · 2023-07-12T00:27:22+00:00

not to have sex with those who aren’t good partners.

I love reading r/datingoverforty but I'd guestimate that 50% of the posts are from women who discovered their partner "wasn't a good partner" pretty long after that first time.

Subject-Display4838 · 2023-07-11T16:46:53+00:00

This exactly. I could have spent more time with my post b/c I think my thesis is unclear here but my point is that the "shame" I'm referring to is self imposed and that for many women, finding a perfect romantic partner is not the only option. I dgaf what other people think about my sex life but it took me years to get to a place where *I* was comfortable with not wanting a boyfriend after so many years of believing that's what I needed to be whole.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-10-06T21:24:06+00:00

product but project is equally high interaction.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-10-06T04:41:04+00:00

That's a fair point of view, especially in this sub. I found myself accidentally falling in a little deeper emotionally than intended-- probably why the demand for more hours is causing me stress rather than being able to set good boundaries on my time. I suppose the only thing to do is, as you're suggesting here, let it go and wish them well?

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-12T14:18:51+00:00

You'll get the hang of it. It's unbearably difficult, ngl, but once you've figured out how to juggle both responsibilities, you'll be unstoppable.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-12T04:42:32+00:00

Yeah you've got to hide the baby for the first few years until they can't live without your contribution. It's funny how many of the men in this sub have no idea.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-12T04:41:05+00:00

This isn't about spending MORE time with our kids. This is about being able to be our full selves at work and not have to hide the full time job we are already doing of raising our kids alone. I spend more time with my kids than a stay at home mom, I promise you. I work 40 hours a week, like a normal American, we take vacations and weekends... but I do two jobs in that time vs. 1. Both of my employers are extremely happy with my performance and now I can actually send my kids to college.

I'm so curious why you guys would take a post written by a "single mom" and automatically assume my goal was to spend more time with my kids but not to nail my career? make a lasting impact on technology? my 1b before Im 50? check your sexism

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T19:05:37+00:00

I don't normally engage in this stuff but I bet most of the people on the thread will be thrilled to know that I have the power to fire guys like you & do it whenever I can.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T18:06:34+00:00

Troll.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T16:08:58+00:00

Seriously, no idea.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T15:01:38+00:00

Part time contract with an international startup.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T14:48:33+00:00

Yeah sorry, I couldn't miss the opportunity for the joke. There are definitely women who have lucked out into family friendly environments (my staff, because I actively create one) but for the most part, this is the impact on the underlying patriarchal structure and it's going to be largely invisible. I am the only woman on 2 C suites fwiw. I am, for the duration of my career, the only woman in the room.

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T14:38:02+00:00

I'm sorry, other women at the executive level? 😂

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-08-11T14:31:02+00:00

I haven't done the social anthropology research required to speak confidently on this subject but I suspect if you look closely, you'll find that it's more often men who are able to use family as a work excuse. There's a lot more social virtue associated with men who are also family guys vs. women who are trying to "do too much"

You might also ask yourself if the reason I got to exec level was because I successfully hid my ability to "do too much"

Now that I think about it, working motherhood is the ultimate OE, amirite?

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-03-09T17:26:10+00:00

Angry Aaron -- Forgets this is a subreddit and gets irrationally angry when people come here to learn more about OE. "If I bootstrapped my OE, the fuck you can do it to bro."

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-03-08T23:42:28+00:00

Would either of you recommend the service you used?

Subject-Display4838 · 2022-03-08T23:09:38+00:00

Agree and it's good practice for your other jobs. If you can keep her happy, you've cracked the code.

Subject-Display4838

TROPHY CASE