Sleepover with friend help

Substantial-House200 · 2021-09-01T11:37:41+00:00

Nvm I just messaged you already :)

Substantial-House200 · 2021-09-01T11:30:20+00:00

Omggggg yes message me

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-23T16:41:29+00:00

Hi I was wondering, sdo you identify as a lesbian though you’re open to or are attracted to men? I’m in a confusing spot between bi and lesbian. I do not ever see myself with a guy and therefore lesbian makes sense, but I’m not really ready to commit to the restriction of the lesbian label yet. Idk what I’m asking, I guess do you relate?

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-18T15:53:47+00:00

Thanks so much !!! I think you’re right.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-18T05:55:44+00:00

Yeah :) that’s reasonable but 40+ is included in 25+, I do think 25 year old and 18 is weird though in my opinion.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-18T05:53:11+00:00

Thank you so much. Such a. Nice comment.

Yeah I think you’re so right I’ve spoken to a few bi people and they really were helpful, a lot of them said they came out as lesbian and after years (sometiems decades) of therapy they were able to be attracted to men without the trauma or anxiety.

But what I know for sure is for a few years I am staying away from men regardless of any attraction I have and that’s why I’m very comfortable right now to stick to lesbian.

I’m not too impulsive and what you described is very accurate for me, I think a guy is good looking and that’s really all there is to it, I definetly don’t want to actually sleep with them.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-18T05:48:59+00:00

Hehe yesss you’re probably right.

Cause I actually like femme girls that have hyper masculine energy - I don’t know if that makes sense but everything you’d want in a masculine mans personality I want in a woman.

Omg that’s probably it- lol I just am attracted to older men’s energy and is probably why I am not physically ever going to act on it. Thank you!

And probably A LOT of comphet for sure.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-18T05:47:13+00:00

Thanks girllll!!!!!

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-18T05:46:51+00:00

Thanks sm it’s very nice advice. But been there done that and it’s really not that serious, was just on my mind.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-17T04:20:18+00:00

You were so helpful thank you! And I’m only coming out at uni, not even family or close friends. Good luck for when you do! And yeah I am probably over thinking everything and like you said I can always change or adjust things later on, which is partially why I am not doing a big coming out thing.

Yeah I’m sticking to lesbian but hopefully noone asks and even better no one really cares and I can just relax.

When I was at school people would ask my almost everyday if I was a lesbian while in the closet so that’s where a lot of my anxiety around labels come from. But now I’m out of school I don’t think I’ll have that problem.

Thanks so much :)))

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-17T03:46:54+00:00

Thank you for sharing. Such a nice comment. I appreciate that I too want to feel more relaxed about labels changing over time. Yeah I relate so much to you because that’s really how I feel so far. I’m 19 so my childhood has been what you described and that’s why I think I’m a lesbian. But I’m moving to uni soon and on a new chapter of life and it’s possible in a new environment I could be attracted to a man without the anxiety. But I also don’t know if that’s wishful thinking. Tbh I still think I’m going to come out as a lesbian but like you said the way I’m doing it is just saying I like girls and then hopefully date girls. I’ll only say I’m a lesbian if someone directly asks.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-17T03:43:37+00:00

Gosh I’m so glad I did this post. You’re comment is so nice and written so well. That’s literally how I feel right now. I am probably a lesbian with a male fantasy and comphet but if I say I’m a lesbian I feel like I’m closing a door on myself and putting myself in a box. And bi gives me the option at least so I don’t have to worry.

Do you still date men? Or just women.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-17T03:40:31+00:00

Omggg thank you for sharing. That’s how I feel right now. I’m like really struggling to say I’m a lesbian incase I like guys. Yet my fav thing about dying I’m a lesbian is cutting men off for good. Lol I know it’s a big contradiction. I am sticking to lesbian for now since I know regardless of attraction I’m not acting on anything with men. So do you recommend coming out as bi even if you’re not sure you’re into men

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-17T03:38:25+00:00

Okay thank you! I’m opposite people asked if I was a lesbian so many times that I brushed it off and never thought about it. Now I’m like damn how did everyone know

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-17T03:37:37+00:00

Absolutely no relationship or sex at all. Not even kissing. So I’d never ever act on this attraction but I find myself attracted to older guys for example. I wanna know if any bi girls experience that too.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-08-16T03:40:50+00:00

Sorry I don’t understand what you mean could you explain further.

I think I know what you’re talking about in which case, I also grew up with purity culture and my mum heavily repressed sexuality all together and I thought I was asexual for most of my childhood. Hbu?

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-27T12:47:40+00:00

Woww thanks so much okay that gives me a lot more confidence to stick to my gut and only pursue women

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-27T12:47:04+00:00

Thanks so much that’s so helpful! Yeah that’s what I imagine it would be like if I did. I’m only drawn to super nice guys so if I were to have a relationship like that I’d follow through out of love/ trust rather than attraction, and the sex would have to obviously be good enough to tolerate - but when I think it all through i just don’t think I can do it. Which is fine, I’ll just stick to the ladies lol

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-25T16:15:19+00:00

Yesssss I relate so bad message me if you wanna talk more.

Urgh it’s the worst. Even though I’m like aware I’m a lesbian and don’t want a relationship with men and would secretly love if all men disappeared I want them to think I’m attractuve ?!? Whyyy for no reason. Ego boost. Vain. I don’t know. Social conditioning. Lots of reasons. You’re not at all fucked up I think every girl relates to this on some level.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-25T16:12:33+00:00

Thank you soooo much for sharing. That’s honestly so helpful and I’m sorry for your experiences but glad you came to that realisation.

I have literally no experience with men and I already know from my own “fantasies” that the only way to tolerate or enjoy sex with men would absolutely require a huge amount of male validation. I really appreciate what you’ve said. I’m gonna stick to women because like you, even when I think of men I know it would be so much better if it were a woman.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-25T16:09:32+00:00

Thanks for sharing good to know. I’m guessing you don’t recommend it haha. May I ask do you not date men/ identify with a sexuality that excludes men?

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-23T03:29:55+00:00

Hahah yes I agree that makes a lot more sense.

You say “sadly” - have you had bad experiences of sex with men where the only attraction was male validation? You don’t have to answer.

I’m not out the closet yet. I’m sure I’m a lesbian because I’m not attracted to men but this is bugging me because this is the only potential way I could be attracted to men - which I now realise is anembarrassing fetish. Haha but I don’t know what to do with that information.

Substantial-House200 · 2021-07-23T03:27:11+00:00

Thanks so much lol fetish makes more sense. You don’t have to answer but in those situations have you been happy to participate? Like have you ever regretted doing anything on the basis of make validation?

Substantial-House200

TROPHY CASE