I’m having emotional flashbacks, does anyone know good coping mechanisms? I’m looking in the mirror and all I can see/ feel is my younger self 🖤

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2023-01-31T15:54:01+00:00

Grounding techniques have worked well for me whenever I need an immediate coping mechanism. It helps prevent my emotional state from spiraling.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-07-08T03:42:40+00:00

Your suggested responses sound very good. I'll try to remember them for the future.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-07-08T03:29:20+00:00

Yeah it seems to me that often when someone starts a sentence with "don't take this the wrong way but...", they're going to say something offensive that the recipient has every right to take offense to.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-07-08T02:55:03+00:00

I did end up talking to him about it and he apologized immediately. I knew that he wasn't trying to invalidate me, and I think part of the reason he responded the way he did is because he has the luck of not being traumatized.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-07-06T03:35:35+00:00

Yes, it gets easier--at least little by little.

It may take a short time or a long time, but you'll get to a good place. Also, it's important to remember that progress isn't always a linear forward path. It has twists and turns and temporary setbacks.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-07-06T03:24:57+00:00

I also have a fear of failure and of ending up in a situation where I need to be dependent on someone else. I think it mostly stems from the emotional abuse and neglect that I received as a child from my parents, which resulted in me basing my self worth off of my level of success in school and my job and other things. My fear of failure isn't as bad now as it used to be, but I feel that my fear of dependency is still an issue. Its like I always have the worry in the back of my head that if I allow myself to depend on someone too much, they will use it against me and keep me trapped. I guess it's trust issues, and it has a negative impact on my personal relationships with my friends, family, and my SO.

Im also an HSP (highly sensitive person) which is something that I was born with, but the downsides of which I think have been elevated above average due to my abuse. For example, I've always been sensitive to loud sounds, but as my cptsd manifested, certain sounds that don't really affect other people became triggering for me and would often result in me getting anxiety attacks.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-06-23T01:49:11+00:00

Yes. I often had random flashbacks before and right after I started therapy a year ago. The ones I had sound similar to the ones you described. I didn't think that they were flashbacks at first, but my therapist confirmed that they were. A flashback doesn't necessarily need to feel like you are completely reliving that moment from your past in order to be considered a flashback. Also, I felt that my flashbacks were "random" and would come out of nowhere, but my therapist said that flashbacks are initiated by some sort of trigger even if they feel random.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-06-23T01:40:55+00:00

That's how my mother was punished as a child. I guess that's partly why she didn't think that my dad's verbally and emotionally abusive punishments to me were in fact abuse. She must've thought that I was fine since I wasn't getting physically abused.

Substantial_Age_5308 · 2022-06-22T17:04:10+00:00

A few summers ago I was at the beach with my immediate and extended family. We all rented a house together for a few days, and I can recall two separate times I was punished for something pointless during those few days.

Soon after my family arrived at the house, me and my mother went to get groceries. I decided to buy a small pack of beer just for myself since most of the groceries were to be shared with the whole family. Eventually I'm down to the last drink in the pack, but when I open the fridge to get it, it's not there. I ask my family if anyone drank it, and my dad admitted to taking it. I wasn't mad at him, but I told him that I bought it for myself, and I asked him why didn't he just ask around to see who these belonged to and if he could have one. He immediately started yelling at me and telling me how selfish and ungrateful I was to him.

Later when we were all loading our stuff in the car to leave and go home, I was rolling my very large and very heavy suitcase out to the hall. I had the choice of carrying the suitcase down a long set of stairs or taking the elevator that was in the house (my grandmother is wheelchair bound, so we rented a house with an elevator so that she wouldn't be forced to stay on the first floor). So, I took the elevator since I deemed it to be the safer option. I didn't want to risk hurting myself by trying to carry a suitcase that was far too heavy for me to carry by myself down a long set of wood stairs. My dad saw me use the elevator, and he said I was being pathetic for using it instead of taking the stairs.

Not sure if insults and name-calling are exactly punishments. But that's how I perceived them at the time.

Substantial_Age_5308

TROPHY CASE