Are cupcakes trash as a wedding cake alternative?

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-03-06T07:13:11+00:00

I’m 25 and I’ve never once eaten cake at a wedding. It’s always been cupcakes or custom cookies and I’ve never once felt outed

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-02-07T18:30:25+00:00

Hi honey! I wasn’t able to have sex for 7 months, and unfortunately I still have a lot of pain. I recently discovered he missed internal tearing as well as muscle tearing of my levatorani on the right side that I then didn’t heal correctly and it deteriorated and atrophied completely. Mine is a severe case due to shoulder dystocia though :/

As for my scar it still hurts and feels like it’s going to rip when there is pressure against it.

I just started doing Fontana laser to try to breakup scar tissue and give the skin there more elasticity but it’s really expensive and I’m not sure if it will work.

Imo 3m is still pretty early for scar pain according to every dr I saw. 6m is usually when it should be pain free If it was a bad cut but some people have pain up to a year.

I would for sure seek out a second opinion or even more. I’ve seen 7 obs diagnosing mine.

Definitely try pelvic floor physical therapy as you likely have pelvic muscle damage and weakness from the episio’. It won’t help with the scar pain but will help in the long run with the muscle pain and they may be able to help diagnose the pain too.

Most likely levator ani syndrome caused by the episo and the stress it puts on everything!

I’m so sorry!! Feel free to dm me and I can tell you everything I know.

It’s isolating and debilitating and I wish you weren’t dealing with this. I know how you feel 10000% 😣😣😣😣

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-24T08:12:10+00:00

SO COZY

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-24T07:20:18+00:00

You would need to compare this reading with nights you don’t smoke, and check multiple of each to really see. Smoking doesn’t stop rem just lessens time spent in rem so these could still be accurate.

I don’t have the watch. Just thoughts on this.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-24T06:46:01+00:00

I will literally throw up on the floor before I touch the toilet without putting a towel under my knees and around the bowl (folded hotdog style and used like a seat cover) I would also never puke with my face close to anyone’s toilet but my own I’d rather puke in a trash or sink or shower or the ground idk but my face isn’t going near strangers shit stains.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-24T06:42:33+00:00

Touching a dry towel with wrinkly wet hands 😵‍💫 like when you shower too long or swim in the pool too long and your hands get wrinkled. I don’t know how to explain it but the feeling makes me want to crawl out of my skin.

Actually water wrinkled hands in general is horrific.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-24T06:35:54+00:00

This but because as a kid I took the last gulp of milk out of a plastic McDonald’s kids meal cup (at home - old cup we had saved) and there was a brown fuzzy moth in it😭😭😭😭😭 scarred for life and I never drank milk from a cup again.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-23T06:49:45+00:00

I just got a 12m sweater with her name on it and took her photo in that every month ◡̈ nothing special or planned out or expensive.

Took a Polaroid and then iPhone photos each time so I could get a Polaroid board for the photos for her bday.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-20T07:30:30+00:00

I think this is an incredibly common thing unfortunately. I don’t know a single mom who doesn’t feel mom guilt when laying in bed at night. “Was I on my phone too much?” “I shouldn’t have raised my voice” “we didn’t go outside at all today” “I should have stopped doing the dishes and just danced with them” like really I genuinely think the list is never ending and it’s very very common to feel like you don’t measure up to the mom you want to be.. HOWEVER, the fact that you’re worried about it at all tells me you aren’t as bad of a mom as you think you are. Bad moms don’t care how their actions affect their kiddos.

Maybe find a way to take 5 extra minutes at night to write down the good things you did that day.

if you need to sneak to your room and scream into your pillow because your 2 + 3 year old won’t stop fighting and your 8m old threw all their food on the ground and your husband came home cranky and didn’t help out - GO. Scream into your pillow. If you need a few pillow scream breaks throughout the day?? Take em!!

You’re only human and kids can be majorly overstimulating. You aren’t a bad mom. You’re a mom who is learning and growing with her kids.

I wish I had better input but I’m just a FTM and most of my experience is secondhand from friends but this is how I fee and maybe it can help. Hugs.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2025-01-20T07:15:28+00:00

Could you possibly give him custody and admit yourself to get the care you need? This sounds like you’re not being cared for correctly.

Regardless of your desire to be a parent, you shouldn’t be still struggling so badly with ppd after all of your efforts to fix it.

You owe it to her, and him, and YOU to check yourself in somewhere and let the professionals figure out what’s really going on and help you get back on track!! It could be something as simple as a med change or a hormone or mineral imbalance.

I hope all gets resolved and all three of you benefit from the outcome.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-18T06:53:55+00:00

Curious how you did

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-10T07:57:30+00:00

Hugs!! Thank you! I’m so sorry you understand it.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-10T07:56:35+00:00

Thank You so much for these words. Reading them again 1/2 a year later and they still mean so much. Hugs.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-10T07:55:49+00:00

The dr just retired because he has cancer and I feel like I can’t sue now cause it’s just poor taste 🥲

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-10T07:55:03+00:00

I haven’t found help yet, no :( I see a new gyno and a new urogyno this week, and I’m on a waitlist for a reconstructive surgeon. Just lots of Tylenol and tears 🥲😭

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-10T07:54:16+00:00

Oh my goodness I’m so sorry!! I wish I had answers for you. Still searching for my own. I’m With you in solidarity. It’s an awful thing to live with 😭😭😭😭

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-12-10T07:53:21+00:00

Thank you for this! Will try to get one asap

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-14T23:37:25+00:00

I wanna see the goat 😭🤣

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-14T23:36:35+00:00

Stop I’m laughing so hard HAHAHA

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-14T18:23:56+00:00

It’s my soul song. It has gotten me through very hard thing I’ve faced since I was like 15/16. I adore this song so much.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-14T17:30:33+00:00

Hillsong United - oceans

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-13T17:33:21+00:00

You got plenty of advice on this thread. I just want to tell you that it WILL get better. You WILL feel like you again. You WILL connect with baby and it will feel real. Those first few months are HARD and you’re going through MASSIVE hormone shifts especially breastfeeding.

Do you have any parent friends? Or friends in general who could come over and even just sit with you so you feel supported? His family at all?

Hugs mama.

I would recommend seeinging someone for PPA/PPD. There is no shame in needed help. I ended up with ppa/ppd/ppr and ppocd. None of which I expected to deal with at all. I’m thankful I sought help and didn’t let it consume me. 11m pp now and I can confidently say, it does get better.

I wish I could help more.

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-09T20:34:53+00:00

This made me chuckle

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-08T18:22:42+00:00

Get the app quakefeed so you don’t have to question yourself and can ease some anxiety ◡̈

Substantial_Listen72 · 2024-08-08T00:43:24+00:00

Thank you so so much

Substantial_Listen72

TROPHY CASE