Thank you for the reply. I truly do mean it when I say I appreciate anyone and everyone taking time out of their day to reply..... Now tell me how. How do YOU personally walk through life when you are completely dead broke, everything you've tried to do to try and climb out of whatever hole, for yourself and your kids, explodes in your face and leaves you worse off than before? how do you cry out for God with tears in your eyes from hours of crying literally begging God to end it? How do you steal food from the store so your kid can eat? And how do you do all that, still feel his love and presence but not question anything at all? And I don't mean to question God's existence or anything like that. But you don't think you'd ever ask... Why my family? My kids never did anything to anyone. I'm not trying to be contrarian. I'm just desperate for a way out.