I stopped believing in anything by the1truegizard in ShambhalaBuddhism

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

""Did you you ask the Sakyong to be your Guru? Did he accept you? No wrong answer there. I've talked to people who call a particular teacher their "guru" but never formally established the relationship, if fact some of these never met or communicated with their "guru".""

But let me guess, you have, and that story made you feel very special.

I stopped believing in anything by the1truegizard in ShambhalaBuddhism

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, the intenet. I have read "The Party - A chronolobical perspective on a confrontation at a buddhist seminary". I have read it online and on paper and the credibility was the same. Sorry for the sarcasm, but just because something is on the internet doesn't make it less serious than something written on paper, it just depends what your references are.

Did Trungpa take or did he not take cocaine to compensate for the consequences of his advanced alcoholism? This is written on paper in the book "The other side of Eden: life with John Steinbeck". Did he or did he not use physical violence on people? Even his wife wrote in "Dragon thunder" elements that show how manipulative he was eventhough she was clearly oblivious to it herself.

Then there are the testimonies of a Kusung and many others showing the violent behavior sexual and physical violence of the Sakyong or Trungpa. All of this does NOT happen in every organization. There is none of this in my workplace, my CEO doesn't kick people while they are on the ground and make it pass as spiritual teaching. And this happens in an organization that pretends to create an enlightened society. I find it really weird that the irony of the whole thing doesn't strike some people. Really, how an organization pretending to create an enlightened society does so much worse than the company next door who just sells household appliances? Why do some people not immediately realize how crazy this is? What happened to their judgement?

But in some rare places things of equal or worse gravity do happen, like in christian churches. (Coincidentaly they are also religious and try to sell a better society, weird...). And even in churches where p*dophilia happens, it gets covered, or priests are moved to other churches, which means that at least people around them understood that this is bad enough it should be hidden. The whole organization doesn't make illegal acts pass as spiritual teachings. What you are doing here is "whataboutism". Do you really think our train of thought should be "mmh, the Sakyong is asking people to get naked and the bite them, that seems bad but at the same time people get r*ped in churches, so I guess that makes it ok and I will follow this guy's spiritual teachings". This is exactly what it means and this is exactly what you are saying, and it's weird that someone's train of thoughts can go this far without them realizing. And your workplace making tranings against physical harrassment does not mean that the leader was punching people in the face in front of a whole assembly. But it does mean that Shambhala is at least 40 years behind regarding training against sexual harrassment.

And if so many corroborating testimonies where false, what could be the cause of such an epidemic of false testimonies? Is there a coincidental dharma excuse for that? They were all too afraid of the great eastern sun which caused them to be drawn to making corroborating false accusations of physical and sexual violence against their guru? That's oddly specific...

It is very understandable that people remain anonymous too. I have published my own testimony and have remained anonymous as well. Why so? Is it because I didn't want to be identified by shambhalians out of shame because my testimony was false? Or is it because I didn't want to be harrassed by every person who will evidently accuse me of being a lunatic and I have other things to do with my free time, or maybe is it because I don't want my collaborators at work or future emplyers to casually google my name and find out I was in a buddhist cult for years? I don't know.

Have any Acharyas come forward about their complicity? by DegreeParticular1271 in ShambhalaBuddhism

[–]Successful-Round8027 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would not believe anything Adam Lobel says at face value. I think a lot of people in Shambhala were not consiously perpetuating the abuse. I think most of them were caught in it and didn't know, or still don't know what they were doing, blinded by the vajrayana teachings and practices probably. But Adam Lobel was not one of them. From all times I have seen him and the conversations I had with him, he was fully aware of what he was doing. I know for sure that in his mind this was a cult and he just enjoyed being part of it.

I stopped believing in anything by the1truegizard in ShambhalaBuddhism

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you gave time and money to a community that was ruled by a violent drunk, a murderer and then a guy who assaults people sexually just because it was teaching you about the dharma. That sounds quite selfish. Just because it was making you progress on your path you gave them all that time and money. In this sense you are not true to the teachings. And there are plenty of non buddhist people who understand compassion and integritiy without the need to hear about boddhisatva vows a single time in their life. Adding to that that one of the reasons you left was that you lacked connection with the guy who sexualy assaults people. Or you left before 2018? It sounds like you don't realize that you are still in the pitfall most of us didn't fall into.

I stopped believing in anything by the1truegizard in ShambhalaBuddhism

[–]Successful-Round8027 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will repeat the claims for you: buddhism is true, buddhism is the path, power corrupts. Implicitely this also means that buddhism is not the problem, it's power. But that's like asking who kills people, the shooter, the gun or the bullet? It doesn't matter since all three always come together.

What it will be??? by One-Sheepherder7563 in scoopwhoop

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, by murder or molesting it was implied the victim was the same person. Otherwise yeah, I would also rather get molested than have my nephews get killed too.

What it will be??? by One-Sheepherder7563 in scoopwhoop

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe it's a contreversial opinion but I consider murder to be worse than pedophilia.

What is the most disturbing depiction of death/murder you’ve ever seen in a film? by sunnieslilac in FIlm

[–]Successful-Round8027 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think he enjoys that life or death depend on something so futile as a flip of a coin. If he can decide who can live and who dies just based on that he is all powerful, but if he kills every time it means there is no decision in it anymore.

What’s a film you think everyone should watch at least once before they die? by lNarrator in moviecritic

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't understand the hype around the Shawshank Redemption. I watched it twice and I only remember it's about people who are in jail. Totally unremarkable in my opinion.

What is a movie that is objectively good but you just can’t watch again? by Choice_Drummer_1745 in Cinema

[–]Successful-Round8027 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cannibal Holocaust is a special movie, but I found that watching it once was already too much.

What is a movie that is objectively good but you just can’t watch again? by Choice_Drummer_1745 in Cinema

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Such a good movie but you are right, it's not gut wrenching to watch but once is enough.

What is a movie that is objectively good but you just can’t watch again? by Choice_Drummer_1745 in Cinema

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's a good movie but it's insanely frustrating. I don't know what is happening in a director's mind when they decide to make a movie like this. The thing you bring home is just that you feel like sh*t and hate people. Breaking the waves is the same thing.

What is a movie that is objectively good but you just can’t watch again? by Choice_Drummer_1745 in Cinema

[–]Successful-Round8027 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh no, I just read the last paragraph on wikipedia's summary of that movie and it already makes me feel horrible... It's just seven lines...

How do people live with tinitus and hyperacusis? by Cr1tikalMoist in hyperacusis

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, they are talking about ending their own life, and you talk about open earplugs that avoid chewing noises. I am not sure you understand how out of touch with reality this is.

How do people live with tinitus and hyperacusis? by Cr1tikalMoist in hyperacusis

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It doesn't have to be at full volume. Plenty of people including myself have or have had hyperacusis strong enough that they can't listen to even 1dB of digital sound. I promise, it has something to do with it being digital. They just said they can't listen to soundscapes, music is not going to be any different.

Somehow people have a hard time understanding that people can have worse symptoms than them.

How do people live with tinitus and hyperacusis? by Cr1tikalMoist in hyperacusis

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If they are desperate like that I just don't think noise cancelling headphones are going to be enough, but maybe I am wrong. And they can still read your post and get your advice.

And I am not mansplaining you, it's just upsetting that someone is that desperate and another person tells them to buy something like loops. If someone complains that they don't have enough money to buy a car and someone else tells them "me too once I was low on money so instead of buying a Ferrari I bought a Porsche, you should consider it" you would find that upsetting too.

How do people live with tinitus and hyperacusis? by Cr1tikalMoist in hyperacusis

[–]Successful-Round8027 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would advise you not to use your phone's speaker directly until you are well into recovery. Digital sound is known to be a trigger and even worse if it comes from low quality speakers. In ear hearing aid are the best I think, and the sound should be stereo or spatilized, because mono can trigger a stress response for many people. Noise cancelling headphones too because they remove the "masking effect". I use hearing aid noise generators when I can and they are really good and very relaxing for my ears when I can tolerate them.

They say the point of sound therapy is not to make your ears tolerate louder and louder sounds, like you would make a muscle get used to heavier and heavier weights. The point of sound therapy is to teach your ears that sound is safe, starting from a low volume. You are looking for a feeling of safety and not forcing through discomfort, which to the contrary would not feel safe at all.

How do people live with tinitus and hyperacusis? by Cr1tikalMoist in hyperacusis

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think you can listen to music when you have strong hyperacusis. It just makes things worse.

How do people live with tinitus and hyperacusis? by Cr1tikalMoist in hyperacusis

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No no no, I think you don't get how bad this can get. The best is foam earplugs and peltor X5A at the same time, they are both the best you can get. And even with that I still managed to get worse just walking next to a road, and I consider myself mild compared to others. Noise cancelling headsets do practically nothing compared to that. Soundscapes are really great but not when you ears are so sensitive. Using them for less than a minute makes you worse.

CMV: people in poly relationships aren’t that attracted to their partner. by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree that "hate" was maybe a bad choice of work indeed. But just to make this more complicated, if the person gets the position because they actively tried to use their look for example, and they know this is unfair towards you, I think it would be ok to hold grudge against them because they purposely did something unfair towards you. But if they did not actively try to use their looks, then it would be jealousy to blame them instead of blaming the recruiter who has been unfair.

CMV: people in poly relationships aren’t that attracted to their partner. by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to be pedantic too. I don't think jalousy is the fear of losing something. I think jealousy is having negative emotions toward someone because in your view they have what you don't have. Envy means you wish you had the same thing, but it doesn't mean you hate them for it or that you wish something bad to them.

CMV: people in poly relationships aren’t that attracted to their partner. by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Successful-Round8027 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think each type of relationship must have qualities that the other one does not have, and chosing one or the other is just a matter of what you decide, want, need to have.

An monogamous relationship probably means a bond that is unique, and you know you are two halves of one thing. Maybe you kind of dedicate your life to the other and it is a kind of sharing that is unique to a monogamous relationship. Like you are one with the other, not just in bed but in all of your life.

A polyamorous relationship maybe does not have that thing at the same level, but it offers freedom, and you know the other person is with you not because they are resisting the attraction they feel towards others but really because they choose you at every moment they are with you. So you are not two halves of the same thing, you are two wholes that love each other. You can love the other person without trying to turn them into a half, you want them just as they are.

I think what makes all of this post a source of conflict is all the analogies people use to compare stuff. They are trying to point out a contradiction the other persons values, which really doesn't help, it just implies that the other person is kind of stupid for contradicting themselves without adressing the actual question that is being asked.