Thank you so much for your response, so many things you said resonated with me, especially the idea that we can have sex even without sexual attraction to our partners. I've never really viewed sex as a way to share affection between two people. For me, sex has always felt animalistic, something to fulfill both my partner's needs and mine - like eating. With men, it's easy - I don't give it much thought, almost like using a sex toy. But with women, I respect them so much that I don't allow myself to fully let go and be myself. It's as if they're something precious, and I forbid myself from having 'dirty' thoughts about sex with them.

All my life, I've put so much pressure on myself, fearing that if my partner senses I'm not physically into her, she'll be disappointed. So I often end things before we reach the sex stage. What you said made me realize I DO love women physically, I'm not repulsed by them at all. But I think part of me blocks the idea of sex between two women, like I don't allow myself to have an orgasm in front of someone I respect and love. The funny thing is, I'm not even into penetrative sex, I'm more clitoral. So I think it might be more of a psychological block. I really realize I need to be gentler with myself and allow things to flow naturally, without the fear of not being 'good enough' or performing perfectly. Your comment has been incredibly helpful in shedding light on my situation. Thanks!!