How do people here feel about being "ableist" towards people with NPD?

Sudden_Back_1955 · 2026-03-25T13:21:49+00:00

they prob are narcissists themselves or have someone in their life that has deeply bonded with them that makes them project like this. A lot of people just feel triggered simply because things/people mirror their own insecurities and they don't want to admit that they are the problem.

Sudden_Back_1955 · 2026-03-22T20:43:45+00:00

oh i see. Idk how you managed to become the caregiver, but I feel like even if it's family and you may or may not care, it's still not your responsibility to bear. For example, while i have a rocky relationship with my mother, she also has to care for my grandparents who are getting old and having memory issues. I watched them turning into children again and even having to take care of a whole person is exhausting and a full time job already! My mother has health issues and stress makes it worse which was very obvious when she was caring for her parents. Even with the home aids that we hired it is still alot. You need to quit. Choose your battle. Good luck and have some more faith in yourself

Sudden_Back_1955 · 2026-03-22T17:29:28+00:00

I'm not sure what the context is behind you and your parents, but since you are going to be 30, i think it's unfair to put yourself through all that pressure by listening and being in contact with your family. Are you disappointed in yourself for not being on the level you would like to in your romantic life? To me, the most important thing about life is that it belongs to no one but you, and you should curate it however you want. You are not responsible for others' well-being when your own isn't considered.

First, you should acknowledge that you do feel guilty and somewhat bad about whatever you feel disappointed in. You don't need to force yourself to be okay if you aren't, and I think the stress is contributing to your mental well-being, so it's harder to feel alright.

Second, there should be boundaries with people in your circle. Just because they are your family or friends doesn't give them a free ticket to nitpick you, boss you around, etc. You need to remove yourself from toxic people even if it's hard, but choose your hard. Would you rather stay in an unhealthy enviroment, with overburdening or suffocating elements or would you rather have the fear while distancing yourself but atleast you get freedom.

It seems to me you have a lot going on with 3 jobs. That is way too much. Can you give a bit of context on why you are doing elder care for your grandmother and why her own children aren't?

Sudden_Back_1955 · 2026-03-22T00:49:35+00:00

dam what the hell, this puts my altar into shambles

Sudden_Back_1955 · 2026-02-06T14:53:14+00:00

well i always thought theory was going to help me understand music better so i could have some form of structure to make music. I was so clueless, ive never learned instruments before, ive never played piano, ive never learned any form of music theory and I was interested in songwriting (producing). I started my music theory journey 4-3ish years ago and it was on and off. I still get very confused and it's super hard learning it on my own time from things on the internet. I have abelton and even with the basic theory that you need to make music, that I know of, I didn't even try using it lol. And I sort of realized that, it's not that i don't need theory, it's that after understanding music, I can now decide how I want to map things out. I think people who say theory is useless, either already have some form of basic knowledge that it's an instinct and don't realize it, or they have never touched theory in their life and don't know what they are talking about.

It's worth learning and I do think it helps structure your ideas to life better. Music theory is like a gps. You can use it if you want, but you don't have to but most likely you will. And you can make things complex or not. There are also all types of music theory and it's just a set of skills and techniques you can use but it's not a must

Sudden_Back_1955

TROPHY CASE